10 Things I Hate About Yule


Book Description

When you’re thirsty and hot cocoa simply will not do. Let this spicy holiday collection satisfy your need for a quickie. 10 Things I hate About Yule Christmas Knockout (the extended hot version) The Christmas Package Trimming His Tree Unwrapped Five fast-read Christmas shorts to keep you in the holiday mood. You may have caught a few of these previously in limited edition anthologies, now they are all together in a single collection for your entertainment.




Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat


Book Description

For fans of Laurie Notaro and Jenny Lawson comes an uproarious and oddly endearing essay collection for anyone trying to survive the holidays in one piece. When it comes to time-honored holiday traditions, Jen Mann pulls no punches In this hilariously irreverent collection of essays, Jen Mann, nationally bestselling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat, turns her mordant wit on the holidays. On Mann’s naughty list: mothers who go way overboard with their Elf on the Shelf, overzealous carolers who can’t take a hint, and people who write their Christmas cards in the third person (“Joyce is enjoying Bunko. Yeah, Joyce, we know you wrote this letter.”). And on her nice list . . . well, she’s working on that one. Here, no celebration is off-limits. The essays include: • You Can Keep Your Cookies, I’m Just Here for the Booze • Nice Halloween Costume. Was Skank Sold Out? • Why You Won’t Be Invited to Our Chinese New Year Party From hosting an ill-fated Chinese New Year party, to receiving horrible gifts from her husband on Mother’s Day, to reluctantly telling her son the truth about the Easter Bunny, Mann knows the challenge of navigating the holidays while keeping her sanity intact. And even if she can’t get out of attending another Christmas cookie exchange, at least she can try again next year. Praise for Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat “Mann’s writing has transcended from witty anecdotes and complaints to notable satire. Hidden among the many laugh-out-loud zingers are lessons on how we relate to each other, and how ridiculous parenting culture has become.”—Associated Press “Following the success of her first book, she is now punching throats at holidays, starting from her being age two and continuing to the present, where she is a harried mother bemoaning not just Christmas but all holidays. . . . Harried holiday haters will chuckle and perhaps see themselves somewhere in Mann’s lifetime dislike of and misbehavior during America’s increasingly commercialized celebrations.”—Booklist “The cure for my cold holiday spirit this year is the sidesplitting new book by Jen Mann. . . . Mann delivers her signature punch lines and sharp critique on the oftentimes ridiculous shenanigans of the modern family. Her ability to make an otherwise boring subject come alive with colorful personalities, biting sarcasm, and impressively astute observations on suburban culture is what makes Mann so much fun to read and so easy to relate to.”—The Huffington Post “A lighthearted, laugh-out-loud book . . . with a feel of peeking into a diary.”—Mommy’s Memorandum “It really does make you laugh out loud.”—Shooting Stars Mag “A quick and delightful read that you can sneak in right before bed or when the kids are finally napping.”—FangirlNation “Grab a cup of hot cocoa, sit back and enjoy Jen’s latest collection of humorous rants dissecting the ‘most wonderful time’ of the year. She unleashes her biting wit and hilarious opinions on everything from cookie exchanges to annual humblebrag Christmas letters from overachieving moms to horrifying Christmases of her childhood.”—Creating Serenity “[Mann] has really mastered the short story format. . . . She packs the maximum amount of funny into the fewest words, and many of these essays are downright hilarious. . . . If you’ve read and liked her other books, you will definitely want to read this one, too.”—Bug Bug Book Reviews




Introducing Performative Pragmatics


Book Description

This user-friendly introduction to a new ‘performative’ methodology in linguistic pragmatics breaks away from the traditional approach which understands language as a machine. Drawing on a wide spectrum of research and theory from the past thirty years in particular, Douglas Robinson presents a combination of ‘action-oriented approaches’ from sources such as J.L. Austin, H. Paul Grice, Harold Garfinkel and Erving Goffman. Paying particular attention to language as drama, the group regulation of language use, individual resistance to these regulatory pressures and nonverbal communication, the work also explains groundbreaking concepts and analytical models. With a key points section, discussion questions and exercises in every chapter, this book will be an invaluable resource to students and teachers on a variety of courses, including linguistic pragmatics, sociolinguistics and interpersonal communication.




Krampus


Book Description

“Terrific. A wild ride….I loved it. It hooked me and I couldn’t put it down.” —Mike Mignola, creator of Hellboy "Brom is that rare breed: a person who is skilled in more than one area of artistic expression. Here's hoping that he will continue to share his dark and often beautiful dreams with us for many years to come." --Christopher Paolini, New York Times bestselling author of Eragon Acclaimed author and artist Brom raised eyebrows and pulse rates with The Child Thief, his grim, brilliantly audacious, gorgeously illustrated reimagining of the Peter Pan legend. So what does this innovative fantasist do for an encore? He tinkers darkly with the beloved mythology of Santa Claus. Set in Appalachia, Krampus the Yule Lord is a twisted fairytale about a failed West Virginia songwriter who gets ensnared on Christmas Eve in an eternal war between a not-so-saintly Saint Nick and his dark enemy Krampus, aka Black Peter, an ancient trickster demon. Krampus the Yule Lord is Gregory Maguire (Wicked) meets Susanna Clarke (Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell) in the realm of Guillermo Del Toro’s Pan’s Labyrinth, as Clive Barker (Mr. B. Gone) works his dark sorcery from the shadows. Once again featuring Brom’s chillingly beautiful artwork throughout, Krampus the Yule Lord is a feast of wonder straight from the kitchen of Sweeney Todd.




Nothing Lasts Forever (Basis for the film Die Hard)


Book Description

High atop a Los Angeles skyscraper, an office Christmas party turns into a deadly cage-match between a lone New York City cop and a gang of international terrorists. Every action fan knows it could only be the explosive big-screen blockbuster Die Hard. But before Bruce Willis blew away audiences as unstoppable hero John McClane, author Roderick Thorp knocked out thriller readers with the bestseller that started it all. A dozen heavily armed terrorists have taken hostages, issued demands, and promised bloodshed — all according to plan. But they haven’t counted on a death-defying, one-man cavalry with no shoes, no backup, and no intention of going down easily. As hot-headed cops swarm outside, and cold-blooded killers wield machine guns and rocket launchers inside, the stage is set for the ultimate showdown between anti-hero and uber-villains. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good fight... to the death. Ho ho ho!




How the Grinch Stole Christmas


Book Description

Get in on the Christmas cheer with Dr. Seuss’s iconic holiday classic starring the Grinch and Cindy-Lou Who—guaranteed to grow your heart three sizes! Every Who down in Who-ville liked Christmas a lot...but the Grinch, who lived just north of Who-ville, did NOT! Not since “’Twas the night before Christmas” has the beginning of a Christmas tale been so instantly recognizable. From the Grinch and his dog, Max, to Cindy-Lou and all the residents of Who-ville, this heartwarming story about the effects of the Christmas spirit will warm even the coldest and smallest of hearts. Like mistletoe, candy canes, and caroling, the Grinch is a mainstay of the holidays, and his story is perfect for readers young and old.




Yule and Christmas


Book Description




The Graveyard Book


Book Description

It takes a graveyard to raise a child. Nobody Owens, known as Bod, is a normal boy. He would be completely normal if he didn't live in a graveyard, being raised by ghosts, with a guardian who belongs to neither the world of the living nor the dead. There are adventures in the graveyard for a boy—an ancient Indigo Man, a gateway to the abandoned city of ghouls, the strange and terrible Sleer. But if Bod leaves the graveyard, he will be in danger from the man Jack—who has already killed Bod's family.




Rebel Yule (A Rookie Rebels Holiday Novella)


Book Description

A holiday entry in the Rookie Rebels series, featuring a player who’s been here from the start . . . Chicago Rebels goalie Erik gets his shot at love . . . but first he'll have to figure out what he did to offend the woman he's crushed on forever. Casey Higgins, assistant to the Chicago Rebels owner, has a smile for everyone who comes into the front office—everyone but goalie Erik Jorgenson. And he has no idea why. For the last year, she’s refused to give him a kind word, and finally, he’s had enough. At the Rebels holiday party he’ll uncover the root of their mysterious conflict and show this woman that goalkeepers do their best work . . . on their knees. Can a little Yuletide cheer get Erik into Casey’s good graces, warm bed, and frozen heart? Or will he fumble the puck and lose his chance? Join the Chicago Rebels this holiday season and find out if Erik is as good at saving Christmas as he is at saving goals!




These Are a Few of the Things That I Hate


Book Description

Walk through the politically incorrect year of satire, humor and outrageously absurd yet realistic observations to help you get through the day. Free your curmudgeonly mind with these hilarious observations, stories and nod to blistering diatribes that will have you laughing from January to December. This obsessive and fearless collection of life's injustices, grievances and petty pretensions will help you categorize the things you hate. Because it's about time someone wrote this stuff down! From New Year's resolutions through St. Patrick's Day, toning up for the beach, Thanksgiving treachery, the IRS, politics and right into Christmas, this is the funny side of hatred.




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