Boyface and the Quantum Chromatic Disruption Machine


Book Description

Boyface Antelope has been waiting his whole life to turn ten and be allowed to enter his parents' stripemongering shop so he can take stripes off animals and put them on something different. Like tartan onto badgers, or removing the stripes of zebras to make ponies. On the morning of his tenth birthday he finds his parents ill, and they ask him not just to go in the shop but to look after it on his own! Will he be able to keep the stripemongery running smoothly?




Boyface and the Power of Three and a Bit


Book Description

Mr Antelope has disappeared, leaving Boyface Antelope in charge of the stripemongering shop. When Boyface gets a message from his dad, hidden in a message in a bottle, he is determined to go and rescue him. Will Boyface and his friends be able to defeat the evil villain and rescue his dad?




Boyface and the Uncertain Ponies


Book Description

Uncertain Ponies are making the inhabitants of Stoddenage-On-Sea very unhappy. Ponies have turned (back) into zebras, and suspicion is falling on the Antelope family's stripemongering shop as the source of the problem. Could something have gone wrong with the Quantum Chromatic Disruption Machine, and can Boyface Antelope and his friend Clootie Whanger fix it before all of Stoddenage-On-Sea's ponies are affected?




Boyface and the Tartan Badger


Book Description

Boyface Antelope has been given a tartan badger for his tenth birthday. As everyone knows, tartan badgers are the worst pets in the world: they live for up to forty years, you can never give them away, they smell of lemony hospitals and need walking twice a day. And one of those times must be in the middle of the night. But even so, when the tartan badger is stolen Boyface enlists the help of his friend Clootie to get him back. But who could the thief be? The only clue is a red clown nose ...




Boyface and the Quantum Chromatic Disruption Machine


Book Description

Boyface Antelope has been waiting his whole life to turn ten and be allowed to enter his parents' stripemongering shop so he can take stripes off animals and put them on something different. Like tartan onto badgers, or removing the stripes of zebras to make ponies. On the morning of his tenth birthday he finds his parents ill, and they ask him not just to go in the shop but to look after it on his own! Will he be able to keep the stripemongery running smoothly?




The Funny Life of Pets


Book Description

A hilarious book from bestselling author and stand-up comic James Campbell, who has visited over 3,000 primary schools to tell stories and encourage children to write their own. Uncover the sidesplitting life of cucumber scaredy-cats, non-stop pooping hamsters, exploding fish and everything in-between (and some things that have nothing to do with pets but are still ridiculously funny). This hilarious book answers all the big questions, like: do sausage dogs eat sausages? Why has my cat done a poo behind my wardrobe? And how can I persuade my parents to get me a pet? For real-life pet facts, imaginary stories, and a generally laugh-so-hard-snot-comes-out-your-nose read, this is the only pet book you'll ever need! Written by the outstanding children's comedian James Campbell, prepare yourself for The Funny Life of Pets! But be WARNED – this IS NOT a normal book...You read a normal book by starting on page one and reading to the end (BORING). You can read this book forwards, backwards, sideways, and in approximately 861,000 different ways in-between. This is a book with outrageous facts, hilarious jokes, insanely funny online videos and brilliant stories all about pets, the author, and all sorts of other things. WARNING: Anything you think you might have learned from this book might not be very accurate so should not be used in a school project or as part of homework. Unless of course, you are made of stardust and are as brave as sunshine.




Write Your Own Funny Stories


Book Description

_______________ 'James Campbell is the funniest man I know' - Chris Riddell _______________ A fun and engaging activity book from bestselling author and stand-up comic James Campbell, who has visited over 3,000 primary schools to tell stories and encourage children to write their own. Have you ever wanted to write your own sizzlingly stupendous stories but just don't know where to start? Then look no further! Write Your Own Funny Stories will guide you step by step towards becoming the witty wordsmith you always wanted to be. Written by children's stand-up comic and best-selling author of The Funny Life of series, James Campbell, this amazing interactive guide is packed full of everything you need to become an awesome author. From planning story ideas and plots, coming up with brilliant characters and settings, and, of course, 'finding the funny', this refreshing and reassuring toolbox of tips and tricks will have you reaching for your duck feather quill and writing slippers faster than you can shout silly simile! With hands on writing and drawing activities throughout, as well as a section at the back of the book for you to write your own funny stories, prepare to astound your friends and family with your amazing superstar writing skills!




The Funny Life of Sharks


Book Description

A hilarious book from bestselling author and stand-up comic James Campbell, who has visited over 3,000 primary schools to tell stories and encourage children to write their own. Ever wondered why sharks have such a bad reputation? Are they dangerous, human-munching monsters? Or have we got it all wrong? In fact, only SIX people get attacked by sharks every year across the WHOLE WORLD. And how many sharks are eaten by humans every year? ONE HUNDRED MILLION! So maybe sharks are more afraid of us ... Take a deep dive into the ridiculously funny life of sharks (and some things that have nothing to do with sharks but are still splendidly funny) according to James Campbell, comedian extraordinaire. This face-achingly funny book will also teach you about great white sharks, tiger sharks and hammerhead sharks, just how incredibly old sharks are, and why sharks are SO important for the environment and how to look after them. So, whether you're seriously afraid of sharks or love them so much you want to invite a shark to your next birthday party, this HILARIOUS book is for you. Prepare to roll around the floor laughing with the snot-inducingly brilliant The Funny Life of Sharks, with side-splittingly funny illustrations from Rob Jones.




Talking at the Gates


Book Description

"This literary biography takes its title from a slave novel that Baldwin planned but never finished. Elegantly written, candid, and original, Talking at the Gates is a comprehensive account of the life and work of a writer who believed that "the unexamined life is not worth living.""--BOOK JACKET.




The Funny Life of Teachers


Book Description

Uncover the ridiculously funny life teachers (and some things that have nothing to do with teachers but are still splendidly funny) according to James Campbell, comedian extraordinaire. This book will have hilarious answers to your burning questions about all kinds of teachers, from the old and nasty ones to the smelly and huge ones, and the extraordinary things they do when they're not in the classroom, like roll around on the carpet, eat a humongous cake, and cast spells. This snot-inducingly funny book will also function as a trusty survival guide to school years. Learn why you should carry an emergency banana with you at all times, how to fart in class silently without pooing yourself, and how to catapult yourself to school by building a medieval style trebuchet in your back garden! But be warned - this is NOT a normal book. You can read it forwards, backwards, sideways, and in approximately 861,000 different ways in between. Whichever way you read it, look no further for fantastic real-life teacher facts, incredibly funny illustrations, imaginary stories, and an impossibly silly read!