How Not to Become a Little Old Lady


Book Description

You can be little. You can be old. You can be a lady. But you don’t have to be a little old lady! We’ve all seen her, hunched forward, her hair tucked neatly under a plastic rain bonnet. She’s clutching expired coupons, or discussing her latest health problems over lunch. She’s a little old lady . . . and she's coming your way at 2 mph. Little old ladies have elastic waistbands on all their slacks. They save rubber bands, remember fifteen-cent McDonald’s hamburgers, and have never seen a public rest room that was clean enough. How Not to Become a Little Old Lady is for any woman who is proud to have escaped little old ladyhood—or those in danger of slipping into it. Lighthearted and affectionately funny, it also includes charming illustrations from Adrienne Hartman.




How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man


Book Description

Good things come in small sizes. That is so true, especially for How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man. Big on fun and filled with hilarious insights about how not to let our inner crotchety old man out, this one makes the perfect Father's Day gift. Men will learn how to age gracefully so they never rattle off an inappropriate "dirty old man" joke. They'll learn that reading the obits first is a cardinal sin and that never reading the instructions is a close second.




The Little Old Lady Who Was Not Afraid of Anything


Book Description

‘A clever reworking of a classic story. The little old lady’s fearless attitude and her clever solution as to what to do with the lively shoes, pants, shirt and pumpkin head that are chasing her will enchant young audiences. With brilliantly colored, detailed folk art illustrations. A great purchase.’ —SLJ. Children's Choices for 1987 (IRA/CBC) Notable 1986 Children's Trade Books in Social Studies (NCSS/CBC) Children's Books of 1986 (Library of Congress) 1988 Keystone to Reading Book Award (Pennsylvania Reading Association)




How Not to Act Like a Little Old Lady


Book Description

For everyone who wants to make the years ahead more fulfilling, more fun and more meaningful. Secrets for living a long and happy life after 50.




The Little Old Lady Who Broke All the Rules


Book Description

#1 International Bestseller The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel meets The Italian Job in internationally-bestselling author Catharina Ingelman-Sundberg’s witty and insightful comedy of errors about a group of delinquent seniors whose desire for a better quality of life leads them to rob and ransom priceless artwork. Martha Andersson may be seventy-nine-years-old and live in a retirement home, but that doesn’t mean she’s ready to stop enjoying life. So when the new management of Diamond House starts cutting corners to save money, Martha and her four closest friends—The Genius, The Rake, Christina and Anna-Gretta (a.k.a. The League of Pensioners)—won’t stand for it. Fed up with early bedtimes and overcooked veggies, this group of feisty seniors sets about to regain their independence, improve their lot, and stand up for seniors everywhere. Their solution? White collar crime. What begins as a relatively straightforward robbery of a nearby luxury hotel quickly escalates into an unsolvable heist at the National Museum. With police baffled and the Mafia hot on their trail, the League of Pensioners has to stay one walker’s length ahead if it’s going to succeed…. Told with all the insight and humor of A Man Called Ove or Where’d You Go Bernadette?, The Little Old Lady Who Broke All the Rules is a delightful and heartwarming novel that goes to prove the adage that it’s not the years in your life that count, it’s the life in your years.




How Not to Be Old (Even If You Are)


Book Description

A PEOPLE Magazine Editor's Pick! “The book brims with wisdom, heart and self-deprecating humor. Friend to every generation, Jill Orr writes with an easy, knowing style — you can practically sense her smile radiating through the page.” — Columbia Daily Tribune Old suggests you have life experience, but OLD means you won’t shut up about it. Old brings with it a more relaxed pace of life, while OLD is synonymous with slow driving (and even slower digestion). Old comes with a quiet confidence envied by youth, but OLD comes with bitterness and a rigidity that youth cannot rightfully stand. While growing old is a privilege, becoming OLD is optional. If you don’t mind being “Okay, Karen-ed” by Millennials and Gen Zs, that's totally your choice. But if want to update some of your long-held beliefs (and possibly your even-longer-held hairstyle) to become more relevant, How Not to Be Old will clue you in on how a slight adjustment in behavior and thinking will help you more fully connect with today’s world... and the people who will be in charge of your nursing home one day. A humorous how-to guide on aging gracefully... or not. Perfect gift for boomers, GenX, & millennials looking to find the funny in getting older.




An Elderly Lady Is Up to No Good


Book Description

Maud is an irascible 88-year-old Swedish woman with no family, no friends, and... no qualms about a little murder. This funny, irreverent story collection by Helene Tursten, author of the Irene Huss investigations, features two-never-before translated stories that will keep you laughing all the way to the retirement home. Ever since her darling father's untimely death when she was only eighteen, Maud has lived in the family's spacious apartment in downtown Gothenburg rent-free, thanks to a minor clause in a hastily negotiated contract. That was how Maud learned that good things can come from tragedy. Now in her late eighties, Maud contents herself with traveling the world and surfing the net from the comfort of her father's ancient armchair. It's a solitary existence, and she likes it that way. Over the course of her adventures—or misadventures—this little bold lady will handle a crisis with a local celebrity who has her eyes on Maud's apartment, foil the engagement of her long-ago lover, and dispose of some pesky neighbors. But when the local authorities are called to investigate a dead body found in Maud's apartment, will Maud finally become a suspect?




The Little Old Lady Who Struck Lucky Again!


Book Description

The little old lady is back! This time, Martha Andersson and her friends – the League of Pensioners – have left behind their dreary care home in Stockholm and are enjoying the bright lights of Las Vegas. This is their opportunity for a new lease of life and they plan to make the most of it. But before long, they are up to their old tricks and with ingenious tactics, a pair of false teeth and a wheelchair each, they plot to outwit the security system at one of the casinos. As their antics become more and more daring, Martha and her friends head back to Sweden full of ideas for more money making schemes. However, they aren't the only ones planning on stealing bucket loads of cash and soon find themselves pitted against a gang of dangerous criminals. Can the group of elderly friends work together to outsmart the younger robbers and get away with their biggest heist yet? Or will this job be a step too far for The League of Pensioners? The Little Old Lady Who Struck Lucky Again! by Catharina Ingelman-Sundberg is an insightful comedy, perfect for fans of The Hundred-Year-Old Man Series and The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. Enjoy more funny escapades with The Little Old Lady Behaving Badly!




Little Old Lady Recipes


Book Description

Celebrity chefs? Immersion blenders? Who needs ’em?!? This charmingly unique comfort food cookbook is chock-full of delicious home cooked recipes, hilarious advice and vintage images Meet the extraordinary women who create potluck dinners, church socials, and the best desserts you’ve ever tasted. Every page features their simple, no-frills recipes along with gorgeous photography of the chefs and generous portions of kitchen table wisdom. (“Butter comes from a cow. Tell me where the heck margarine comes from, and then maybe I’ll eat it!”) These satisfying and nostalgic recipes include: • pot roast • meat loaf • dumplings • corn bread • fried chicken • bundt cake and other old-time favorites So ditch the food processor, stop wasting money on overpriced organic frozen dinners, and start enjoying the classic dishes that our aunties and grandmothers have made for generations!




An Elderly Lady Must Not Be Crossed


Book Description

Don’t let her age fool you. Maud may be nearly ninety, but if you cross her, this elderly lady is more sinister than sweet. Just when things have finally cooled down for 88-year-old Maud after the disturbing discovery of a dead body in her apartment in Gothenburg, a couple of detectives return to her doorstep. Though Maud dodges their questions with the skill of an Olympic gymnast a fifth of her age, she wonders if suspicion has fallen on her, little old lady that she is. The truth is, ever since Maud was a girl, death has seemed to follow her. In these six interlocking stories, memories of unfortunate incidents from Maud’s past keep bubbling to the surface. Meanwhile, certain Problems in the present require immediate attention. Luckily, Maud is no stranger to taking matters into her own hands . . . even if it means she has to get a little blood on them in the process. *Includes cookie recipes*