On My Ass


Book Description

Author Lou Dean and her riding buddy Jeanne saddled their faithful steeds Jesse James, a donkey, and Tut, an Arabian. They began a month long ride that took them across northern Colorado, to promote non-violence in schools. As they encounter unforeseen challenges along the trail, Lou Dean wrestles with the brokenness of her past and seeks the courage to stay in the saddle.




Would You Like to Play with My Ass?


Book Description

This may sound a bit crass, but would you like to play with my ass? My ass is big, my ass is strong, when you play with my ass, you're never wrong... This fun, beautiful illustrated playful book will surely crack you up with laughter. The innocent little cute story will get you spend all day reading and laughing. This book will be a huge hit for all occasions: gag gift, baby showers, birthday parties, and wedding presents. Give this book as a gag gift to your friend, and they will remember you forever! *You probably should not read this to your children. The must have book for all people with a great sense of humor. Get this book now and start laughing.




The Best Thing About My Ass Is That It's Behind Me


Book Description

Actress and comic Lisa Ann Walter offers a hilarious, star-studded collection of essays encouraging women to laugh at what they can't change, enjoy a guilty pleasure or two, and finally accept the lives and the bodies they're in now. The star of shows like Abbott Elementary and movies like The Parent Trap, Shall We Dance, and Bruce Almighty delivers a warm, wry, honest, and effective exhortation to find happiness where you are, in a serenity prayer for today’s woman that’s perfect for fans of Gretchen Rubin’s The Happiness Project, Valerie Bertinelli’s Losing It and Chelsea Handler’s My Horizontal Life.




The Ass Book


Book Description

Finally a comprehensive guide to a man's second most important sensual organ! Designed for practical use, "The Ass Book" tells you how you and your partner can get more pleasure from your backside. The authors not only provide you with crucial information about anatomy, but give you useful tips to improve your health, fitness, and appearance and of course for better fun down under. Easy-to-understand and written with the gay man in mind, this book is rounded out with advice from experts and interesting sections on the rear in art, literature, and psychology.




I need a new bum


Book Description

I need a new bum! Mine's got a crack. I can see in the mirror a crack in the back. What to do when you need a new bum? Should you get one that's blue or yellow spotted? A Chevy bum, a rocket bum that's all fire and thrust, or a robo-bum? The options are endless - but wait, Dad's bum crack is showing too? Maybe this is contagious.




Maestro, My Ass!


Book Description

From the Author's Prologue I wrote the original manuscript of this book in 2003, prior to any immediately obvious signs that a crash of the financial markets was on the near (one to five years) horizon. At that time I presented the manuscript to my employer, I was a trader for a major multinational bank, and asked permission to publish it. Since the manuscript was critical of Greenspan and his policies, and stated clearly where they would probably lead us, permission was not granted. At that time, major financial institutions hesitated to challenge Greenspan, and they were very cautious about allowing any of their employees to do so in a public forum. Now that I have left the bank, and the result of Greenspan's policies have been realized, I have decided that it is time to air these opinions and share some of my concerns and suggestions for the future. This is, to be sure, not as timely now as it would have been then. However, it would be presumptuous of me to suggest that publishing this book at that time would have made any difference in what subsequently has taken place-individuals with more authority than mine tried to warn the financial community of the impending disaster, and it is now obvious that they were not listened to. ... The case against Alan Greenspan will have to stand on the evidence presented; it's up to you to decide just how egregious Greenspan's errors of judgment were and whether or not what I have said here convinces you that proper analysis of the situation at the time would have forestalled the current crisis.




My Smelly Ass


Book Description

A story about a smelly donkey with a gas problem, which will have you and your children laughing out loud! Suitable for both boys and girls aged 3 years old up to 8 years old




One Weekend a Month - My Ass!


Book Description

This book is written from a collection of journal entries I kept during my training in California before I went overseas to serve in Iraq, copies of letter I sent home to my two daughters and school that I taught at when activated, as well as some stories that I wrote about my experiences. There are some facts that are incorrect in this book but I kept them in because they were the truth to me at the time. The letters are mostly word for word as they were written and sent. I have included pictures that go along with my writings that help to show, as well as explain, what I experienced. I have changed or omitted the names of people to protect their privacy. I was not a hero, nor was I involved in any large fighting that took place in Iraq. I was just a fifty-three year old man, close to my twenty-year letter for retirement in the National Guard who happened to be sent to war in Iraq. I dont pretend to be brave or have any deep meaning to my experiences. I just want to share an average story of an average soldier in Iraq. Sgt. Joseph Berlin (ret.)




Politically Correct My Ass...


Book Description

As we begin our journey down the path of enrichment, enlightenment and empowerment, let us pray for deliverance from the forces of ignorance and stupidity that rise up before us, and seek to destroy us: "Dominus ominus, exodous en massicus, afarious fromicus, all ye dumbassicus." Do you like that? I wrote it myself...and would you believe that I've never even studied Latin...




Footpath My Ass!


Book Description

When Terry Croteau was twelve years old, tromping around the woods on family outings, looking under leaves for frogs and salamanders, and relieving herself behind trees, she had no idea she’d end up spending over half year doing the same thing from Georgia to Maine. . . in her fifties! What causes a midlife baby boomer to leave her job, sell the house, farm out the furniture and cram all the leftovers in a ten by ten foot storage unit and carry thirty-five plus pounds on her back over 2174 miles? Well, your guess is as good as mine, but that’s what she did. Join Terry, (trail name ‘Bluebird’) as she prepares, then walks, crawls, trips, and falls her way up the Appalachian Trail, (AT) from Springer Mountain, GA to Baxter Park’s Katahdin, in ME. Allow yourself the experience of hiking the AT by living vicariously through Bluebird’s journal entries and reflections. Experience the routine and the totally unexpected, in the life of a long distance thru hiker. Learn where a good sense of humor, sweat, tears and a ‘Don’t give up!’ attitude might take you. Realize how success can be measured more keenly by your attitude than by your accomplishments, that believing in ‘you’ is half the battle, the other half is putting one foot in front of the other. According to the Appalachian Trail Conservancy, approximately 1,150 northbound thru hikers began their trek in 2006 (GA to ME) of the 1,150 hikers, 659 individuals, a little over half, made it to Harpers Ferry, W.Va. (Bluebird was number 501) Maine’s Katahdin greeted 30% of the original 1,150 hikers, with a total of 349 completions in 2006. You will connect with some of those people in Terry’s journal. It doesn’t matter if you’re young, old, male or female, you will appreciate what you find between the cover pages of this book. The author reminds us that, “Life isn’t over till your six foot under and if you’re on this side of the dirt and breathing, you’re alive! So, for God sake and your own, live!”