The Roadkill Tales


Book Description

Earl was you average worm-ranching armadillo until an accident turned his world upside down. Earl no longer looks like an armadillo...he looks more like a tortilla. Now, Earl has to overcome his new "condition" and must learn to coup with a new nickname. With help from friends, love from his wife, and a burst of self confidence, Earl begins to embrace who he is now, learning to love life once again. This book is a silly look through the eyes of typical critters that are found throughout Texas and the United States. With the comical writing style, goofy pictures, and simple story, "The Legend of Tortilla the Armadillo" is the perfect book for children who are beginning their reading journey. This book is written to remind children that reading should be fun, and shies away from the complex world of modern day. Author Michael Lawrence's mission for this book is to remind children that it is okay to be goofy, silly, and to have fun for the sake of having fun. Leave adult situations to adults, and let kids be kids. Children's literature is meant to be an escape, not a platform for social agendas.Enjoy!!!




Antiques Roadkill


Book Description

Brandy Borne finds her return home met with mayhem and murder when her mother, a larger-than-life actress and gossip, is swindled out of some priceless antiques by Clint Carson who then winds up dead, making Brandy the prime suspect in the murder investigation.




Something Rotten


Book Description

An ALA Notable book An Orbis Pictus Recommended title When Heather L. Montgomery sees a rattlesnake flattened on the side of the road, her first instinct is to pick it up and dissect it--she's always wanted to see how a snake's fangs retract when they close their mouths, and it's not exactly safe to poke around in a live reptile's mouth. A wildlife researcher with a special penchant for the animals that litter the roadways, Heather isn't satisfied with dissecting just one snake. Her fascination with roadkill sets her off on a journey from her own backyard and the roadways of the American South to scientists and kids in labs and homes across the globe. From biologists who use the corpses of Tasmanian devils to investigate cures for a contagious cancer, to a scientist who discovered a whole new species of bird from a single wing left behind, to a boy rebuilding animal bodies from the bones up, to a restaurant that serves up animal remnants, Heather discovers that death is just the beginning for these creatures. This engaging narrative nonfiction is an eye-opening and irreverent look at the dead and dying animals that we pass by without a second thought--as well as a fascinating insight to the scientific research process.




If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him


Book Description

A fresh, realistic approach to altering one's destiny and accepting the responsibility that grows with freedom. No meaning that comes from outside of ourselves is real. The Buddahood of each of us has already been obtained. We only need to recognize it. “The most important things that each man must learn no one can teach him. Once he accepts this disappointment, he will be able to stop depending on the therapist, the guru who turns out to be just another struggling human being.” Using the myth of Gilgamesh, Siddhartha, The Wife of Bath, Don Quizote . . . the works of Buber, Ginsberg, Shakespeare, Karka, Nin, Dante and Jung . . . a brilliant psychotherapist, guru and pilgrim shares the epic tales and intimate revelations that help to shape Everyman's journey through life.




Road Kill


Book Description

"It has been the best part of 12 years since I investigated a fatal accident and dealt with grieving relatives. It has taken me 12 years to have the strength to write about it, to put pen to paper and record what has caused me so much grief and anguish." So writes Craig Hodge, one of Victoria Police's leading investigators of fatal road accidents. A police officer for 20 years, eight of which he spent with the Accident Investigation Section (now the Major Collision Investigation Unit), Hodge attended the horrific scenes of more than 350 accidents that resulted in deaths and serious injuries. In ROAD KILL, Hodge recounts harrowing investigations and details the processes involved in finding out the causes of such tragedies, which often led to prosecutions. His story is a cautionary tale in which responsible driving messages loom large. ROAD KILL also provides a poignant account of the emotional and psychological impact such carnage has on all involved, not least of all on investigators like Hodge, who struggled at times to find a balance between being sensitive to victims and their families, while also trying to remain emotionally detached for his own sanity and wellbeing.




If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him


Book Description

A fresh, realistic approach to altering one's destiny and accepting the responsibility that grows with freedom. No meaning that comes from outside of ourselves is real. The Buddahood of each of us has already been obtained. We only need to recognize it. “The most important things that each man must learn no one can teach him. Once he accepts this disappointment, he will be able to stop depending on the therapist, the guru who turns out to be just another struggling human being.” Using the myth of Gilgamesh, Siddhartha, The Wife of Bath, Don Quizote . . . the works of Buber, Ginsberg, Shakespeare, Karka, Nin, Dante and Jung . . . a brilliant psychotherapist, guru and pilgrim shares the epic tales and intimate revelations that help to shape Everyman's journey through life.




PC Roadkill


Book Description

This is the perfect book for anyone who's ever even thought about a computer let alone used one. Inside, readers will get hilarious, yet often twisted, anecdotes of industry wizards as well as the inside scoop on product packaging, computer lingo, favorite foods, first cars, the mouse's background, the best nerd jokes and much, much more!




The Roadkill of Middle Earth


Book Description

A loving parody of Tolkien's characters from his trilogy "Lord of the Rings, The Roadkill of Middle Earth" finds a killer truck on the loose, flattening any wizards, dragons or Hobbits that get in its way. Illustrations.




Florida Roadkill


Book Description

Sunshine State trivia buff Serge A. Storms loves eliminating jerks and pests. His drug-addled partner Coleman loves cartoons. Hot stripper Sharon Rhodes loves cocaine, especially when purchased with rich dead men's money. On the other hand, there's Sean and David, who love fishing and are kind to animals -- and who are about to cross paths with a suitcase filled with $5 million in stolen insurance money. Serge wants the suitcase. Sharon wants the suitcase. Coleman wants more drugs . . . and the suitcase. In the meantime, there's murder by gun, Space Shuttle, Barbie doll, and Levi's 501s. In other words, welcome to Tim Dorsey's Florida -- where nobody gets out unscathed and untanned!




The Pied Piper of Hamelin


Book Description

With this first book in Russell Brand’s Trickster Tales series, the famed comedian, actor, and bestselling author delivers a hilarious retelling of an old fairytale favorite that will appeal to adults and children alike. Once upon a time, long ago, in a time that seemed, to those present, exactly like now except their teeth weren’t so clean and more things were wooden, there was a town called Hamelin. The people of Hamelin were a pompous bunch who loved themselves and their town so much that if it were possible they would have spent all day zipped up in a space suit smelling their own farts. But space suits hadn’t been invented yet so they couldn’t. Then one day without warning a gang of rats bowled into the town and began causing a right rumpus… So begins Russell Brand’s wildly funny and surprisingly wise retelling of the classic tale The Pied Piper of Hamelin. Whether you’re a kid or a grown-up kid, you’ll be chuckling the whole way through this zany story that bypasses Brand’s more adult humor for the outrageous, the madcap, and the just plain silly. Maybe you’ve heard about the Pied Piper before, with his strange music and those pompous townspeople and pesky rats. Or maybe you haven’t. But one thing is for sure: you’ve never heard it quite like this.