Understanding Ruptured Mother-Daughter Relationships


Book Description

Exploring the stages of estrangement between adult daughters and their mothers for mental health professionals who serve women, this book illustrates different stages of estrangement through the Estrangement Energy Cycle and client stories and provides practical tools to therapeutically support clients.




I Am My Mother's Daughter


Book Description

Iris Krasnow -- mother, daughter, and best-selling Journalist -- tackles the toughest relationship in the lives of many grown women: the mother-daughter bond. With women's life expectancy inching up past eighty, you may be embroiled with your mother well past the time your own hair turns white. The good news: Living longer means more time to make peace -- and this book shows you how. Drawing on her own experience with her colorful eighty-four-year-old mother and the collective wisdom of more than one hundred other adult daughters, Krasnow offers a fresh perspective on how to overcome the anger, guilt, and resentment that can destroy a family. The time to repair the bond is now, she reminds us: You can't kiss and make up at her funeral. The key is to let go of the fantasy mom and embrace the flesh-and-blood woman, with all her flaws.




Restoring Family Connections


Book Description

Broken relationships between adult children and their parents is a widespread phenomenon. While the parent-child attachment relationship is of critical importance for the child in the early years of life, the parent-child relationship continues to be a source of great importance over the course of the individual’s life span for both the child and the parent. For adults and adult children who are estranged/alienated from each other, the pain and dissatisfaction never fully go away. Despite the prevalence of the problem of ruptured relationships, there are few resources available for mental health professionals working with this population. This book provides a tool for clinicians to turn to when they are working with adult children and their parents seeking to resolve conflict, improve communication, and enhance their relationships.




Will I Ever be Good Enough?


Book Description

The first book specifically for daughters suffering from the emotional abuse of selfish, self-involved mothers,Will I Ever Be Good Enough?provides the expert assistance you need in order to overcome this debilitating history and reclaim your life for yourself. Drawing on over two decades of experience as a therapist specializing in women's psychology and health, psychotherapist Dr. Karyl McBride helpsyou recognize the widespread effects of this maternal emotional abuse and guides you as you create an individualized program for self-protection, resolution, and complete recovery.An estimated 1.5 million American women have narcissistic personality disorder, which makes them so insecure and overbearing, insensitive and domineering that they can psychologically damage their daughters for life. Daughters of narcissistic mothers learn that maternal love is not unconditional, and that it is given only when they behave in accordance with their mothers' often unreasonable expectations and whims. As adults, these daughters consequently have difficulty overcoming their insecurities and feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, sadness, and emotional emptiness. They may also have a terrible fear of abandonment that leads them to form unhealthy love relationships, as well as a tendency to perfectionism and unrelenting self-criticism, or to self-sabotage and frustration.Herself the recovering daughter of a narcissistic mother, Dr. McBride includes her personal struggle, which adds a profound level of authority to her work, along with the perspectives of the hundreds of suffering daughters she's interviewed over the years. Their stories of how maternal abuse has manifested in their lives -- as well as how they have successfully overcome its effects -- show you that you're not alone and that you can take back your life and have the controlyouwant.Dr. McBride's step-by-step program will enable you to:(1) Recognize your own experience with maternal narcissism and its effects on all aspects of your life (2) Discover how you have internalized verbal and nonverbal messages from your mother and how these have translated into a strong desire to overachieve or a tendency to self-sabotage (3) Construct a step-by-step program to reclaim your life and enhance your sense of self, a process that includes creating a psychological separation from your mother and breaking the legacy of abuse. You will also learn how not to repeat your mother's mistakes with your own daughter.Warm and sympathetic, filled with the examples of women who have established healthy boundaries with their hurtful mothers,Will I Ever Be Good Enough?encourages and inspires you as it aids your recovery.




Difficult


Book Description

A much-needed perspective on how to mother difficult adult children while balancing one’s own needs. Difficult brings to life the conflicts that arise for mothers who are confronted with the unexpected, burdensome, and even catastrophic dependencies of their adult children associated with mental illness, substance use, or chronic unemployment. Through real stories of mothers and their challenging adult children, this book offers relatable, provocative, and, at times, shocking illustrations of the excruciating maternal dilemma: Which takes precedence—the needs of the mother or of the distressed adult child? With guidance for finding social support, staying safe, engaging in self-care, and helping the adult child, Difficult is a compassionate resource for those living in a family situation which too many keep secret and allows readers to see that they are not alone.




Mended


Book Description

“An amazing resource for anyone who desires to deepen their mother-daughter relationship in a biblical, healthy, and healed way.” —Lysa TerKeurst, New York Times bestselling author and president of Proverbs 31 Ministries You can be restored even when your relationship is frayed Ever wonder why mothers and daughters can be so different and even seem to speak different languages? Mended gives you conversation starters to speak life into your relationship with your mother or daughter. Discover powerful words that usher in healing for wounded hearts and rebuild, restore, and reconcile your connection. Set new patterns going forward as you… find common ground and put your relationship ahead of your differences learn what to say when you don’t know what to say grow closer when you do hard things together If you have a difficult history with your mother or daughter, you don’t have to continue patterns of brokenness. No matter how worn you feel, you don’t have to become unthreaded. God wants to mend your heart to His and to hers.




Writing Mothers and Daughters


Book Description

This first systematic study of mother-daughter relationships as represented in Western European fiction during the second half of the 20th century provides a comparative study of works from England, France, Germany, Austria, Ireland, Italy, and Spain. For each individual body of texts, the authors identify characteristics arising from specific national literary traditions and from internal cultural diversities. The text suggests avenues for future investigation both within and across national boundaries. The featured writers include Steedman, Diski, Winterson, Tennant, de Beauvoir, Leduc, Djura, Wolf, Jelinek, Mitgutsch, Novak, Lavin, O'Brien, O'Faolin, Morante, Sanvitale, Ramondino, Chacel, Rodoreda, and Martin Gaite. The six contributing authors are scholars from New Zealand, England, Ireland, Italy and Wales. Annotation copyrighted by Book News, Inc., Portland, OR




Progress in Self Psychology, V. 12


Book Description

Volume 12 of the Progress in Self Psychology series begins with reassessments of frustration and responsiveness, optimal and otherwise, by MacIsaac, Bacal and Thomson, the Shanes, and Doctors. The philosophical dimension of self psychology is addressed by Riker, who looks at Kohut's bipolar theory of the self, and Kriegman, who examines the subjectivism-objectivism dialectic in self psychology from the standpoint of evolutionary biology. Clinical studies focus on self- and mutual regulation in relation to therapeutic action, countertransference and the curative process, and the consequences of the negative selfobject in early character formation. A separate section of child studies includes a case study exemplifying a self-psychological approach to child therapy and an examination of pathological adaptation to childhood parent loss. With a concluding section of richly varied studies in applied self psychology, Basic Ideas Reconsidered promises to be basic reading for all students of contemporary self psychology.




Working with Refugee Families


Book Description

This important new book explores how to support refugee family relationships in promoting post-trauma recovery and adaptation in exile.




Call Me Auntie


Book Description

A truly original story of life in and after care. A unique account of trans-racial fostering which focuses on identity, family history and loss. Call Me Auntie adds to the literature of post-Windrush 1950s Britain and tells of ‘Heartbreak House’ care homes. The author’s account of being abandoned by her mother as a young child and her life in homes and institutions will captivate any reader. The mystery of her search for her mother and constant rejections will leave the reader wondering what demons drove her to be so elusive. “Call Me Auntie” was the best her mother could offer but this was just the start of a bizarre sequence of events. After discovering she had a brother and looking for her long lost family in Barbados the author finally came to understand she “may be a princess after all”. Call Me Auntie is a story of survival, resilience and changing attitudes to racism and ethnicity as the author forged a successful career beginning as a Woolworth’s shop girl before joining the police, then moving into social work. Reviews ‘Anne’s story is a compelling account, not just of her search for her birth mother but of her extraordinary journey from being a child in care, then qualifying as a social worker and finally becoming a magistrate?…?I read it at a sitting and could not put it down. Her account of life in a children’s home in the 1960s and 1970s deserves to find a place on every social work training course’— Retired Judge Robert Zara. ‘This is an excellent read for anyone who has compassion. The author had a really tough childhood brought up by the care system. She raises really important questions. A must-read for anyone who wants to make a difference for children and their lives. Make it compulsory for all social work students’— John Bolton, Visiting Professor, Institute of Public Care, Oxford Brookes University, and a former Director of Social Services. Extract ‘Our new house-parents were Harold and Dora … He was a big guy who always looked angry. She was a little mousy figure but with a steel will underneath … Overnight, the household regime changed. As controlled as our lives might have been in the [previous houseparents’] time, the changes were shocking. Chores had to be performed to much higher standards, and there were new ones … There were new rules, routines, and responsibilities. But this was not all. With the new chores and new rules, our fear set in.'