You'll Leave This World With Your Butt Sewn Shut


Book Description

An irreverent book of morbid curiosities that leaves no headstone unturned This isn’t your average walk through the graveyard. Filled with facts that will tickle your gray matter, You’ll Leave This World with Your Butt Sewn Shut provides answers to all the questions about death that you’ve ever wanted to ask (and more than a few you never thought to). You’ll learn how to avoid incendiary pacemakers and exploding caskets, why Victorians ate mummies and Napoleon artfully arranged skulls, and what morticians do to give you a rosy glow without blood flow. - Is your hamster, cat, or dog most likely to be first in line at the dead-body buffet? The answer may surprise you! - Why did people start booby-trapping graves after the Civil War? Hint: It’s not vampire related. - What’s your best shot at becoming a tree after you die? If you said cremation, you may want to sit down for Chapter 5. But have no fear—this no-holds-barred account of the end that awaits us all is delivered with a smile and a wink. Death always wins, but laughter is a nice consolation prize.




The Code for Love and Heartbreak


Book Description

In this contemporary romcom retelling of Jane Austen’s Emma by USA TODAY bestselling author Jillian Cantor, there’s nothing more complex—or unpredictable—than love. When math genius Emma and her coding club co-president, George, are tasked with brainstorming a new project, The Code for Love is born. George disapproves of Emma’s idea of creating a matchmaking app, accusing her of meddling in people’s lives. But all the happy new couples at school are proof that the app works. At least at first. Emma’s code is flawless. So why is it that perfectly matched couples start breaking up, the wrong people keep falling for each other, and Emma’s own feelings defy any algorithm?




Harpers Weekly


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Poems by Emily Dickinson


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Five Feet Apart


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Also a major motion picture starring Cole Sprouse and Haley Lu Richardson! Goodreads Choice Winner, Best Young Adult Fiction of 2019 In this #1 New York Times bestselling novel that’s perfect for fans of John Green’s The Fault in Our Stars, two teens fall in love with just one minor complication—they can’t get within a few feet of each other without risking their lives. Can you love someone you can never touch? Stella Grant likes to be in control—even though her totally out of control lungs have sent her in and out of the hospital most of her life. At this point, what Stella needs to control most is keeping herself away from anyone or anything that might pass along an infection and jeopardize the possibility of a lung transplant. Six feet apart. No exceptions. The only thing Will Newman wants to be in control of is getting out of this hospital. He couldn’t care less about his treatments, or a fancy new clinical drug trial. Soon, he’ll turn eighteen and then he’ll be able to unplug all these machines and actually go see the world, not just its hospitals. Will’s exactly what Stella needs to stay away from. If he so much as breathes on Stella, she could lose her spot on the transplant list. Either one of them could die. The only way to stay alive is to stay apart. But suddenly six feet doesn’t feel like safety. It feels like punishment. What if they could steal back just a little bit of the space their broken lungs have stolen from them? Would five feet apart really be so dangerous if it stops their hearts from breaking too?




The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle (Scholastic Gold)


Book Description

Avi's treasured Newbery Honor Book now in expanded After Words edition!Thirteen-year-old Charlotte Doyle is excited to return home from her school in England to her family in Rhode Island in the summer of 1832. But when the two families she was supposed to travel with mysteriously cancel their trips, Charlotte finds herself the lone passenger on a long sea voyage with a cruel captain and a mutinous crew. Worse yet, soon after stepping aboard the ship, she becomes enmeshed in a conflict between them! What begins as an eagerly anticipated ocean crossing turns into a harrowing journey, where Charlotte gains a villainous enemy . . . and is put on trial for murder!After Words material includes author Q & A, journal writing tips, and other activities that bring Charlotte's world to life!




Sh*t Towns of New Zealand


Book Description

Based on the hugely popular Facebook page 'Shit Towns of New Zealand', this book describes New Zealand's towns and suburbs from the affluent to the effluent, the rural to the urinal, profiling all the best places not to visit, or heaven forbid, live. Slagging off our towns is as much a national pastime as binge drinking and ball sports. Ever since a Dutch bloke in a sailboat did a drive-by and claimed to have discovered the place, New Zealanders have revelled in taking the mickey. The towns and cities reviewed here have been carefully selected using an exacting set of scientific criteria, combined with extensive field research and a healthy sense of humour. 'Offensive.' Todd McClay, Rotorua MP 'Pretty funny.' Frankie Stevens, National Treasure




Things We Lost in the Fire


Book Description

The “propulsive and mesmerizing” (The New York Times) story collection by the International Booker–shortlisted author of The Dangers of Smoking in Bed and Our Share of Night—now with a new short story. The short stories of Mariana Enriquez are: “The most exciting discovery I’ve made in fiction for some time.”—Kazuo Ishiguro “Violent and cool, told in voices so lucid they feel spoken.”—The Boston Globe (Best Books of the Year) Electric, disturbing, and exhilarating, the stories of Things We Lost in the Fire explore multiple dimensions of life and death in contemporary Argentina. Each haunting tale simmers with the nation's troubled history, but among the abandoned houses, black magic, superstitions, lost loves and regrets, there is also friendship, compassion, and humor. Translated by the National Book Award-winning Megan McDowell, these “slim but phenomenal” (Vanity Fair) stories ask the biggest questions of life and show why Mariana Enriquez has become one of the most celebrated new voices in global literature.




Treasure Island


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