A Man Walks Into a Barn


Book Description

A smart, funny memoir exploring the evolution of a man and his relationship with his daughters as they grow up in the grips of the equestrian life. When Chad Oldfather found himself the parent of a toddler who, out of nowhere, became obsessed with horses, he had no idea what awaited. With his younger daughters similarly afflicted, Oldfather was soon enmeshed in the consuming subculture of barns, riding, and horse shows, learning not just about the animals that so inexplicably drew his girls, but also about the people and personalities that populated the spaces around them. A book for parents, whatever their children's interests, and for equestrians, who know what it's like “on the inside” (but maybe not what it's like on the outside, looking in), A Man Walks into a Barn is a wise, witty, and, at times, critical look at both the light and dark sides of youth sports, and equestrianism in particular. Readers find themselves rooting for Oldfather as he struggles to be the best dad he can, supporting a child's dreams in the face of long odds and extraordinary expenses. He writes about his parenting choices and the strange world he finds himself in with humor and honesty, critically examining riding's high cost and the inaccessibility and inequality that results. Aware of the flaws and dangers of youth athletics, as well as the benefits, he strives to protect his girls while supporting their ambitions the best ways he knows how. Filled with the joys, heartbreaks, and life lessons that come from training, competition, and time in the company of horses, this is mostly a book about family, and the strong bonds that can form when parent and child join hands and pursue a passion together.




A Horse Walks Into a Bar


Book Description

A Guardian and New Statesman Book of the Year The setting is a comedy club in a small Israeli town. An audience that has come expecting an evening of amusement instead sees a comedian falling apart on stage; an act of disintegration, a man crumbling, as a matter of choice, before their eyes. They could get up and leave, or boo and whistle and drive him from the stage, if they were not so drawn to glimpse his personal hell. Dovaleh G, a veteran stand-up comic - charming, erratic, repellent - exposes a wound he has been living with for years: a fateful and gruesome choice he had to make between the two people who were dearest to him. A Horse Walks into a Bar is a shocking and breathtaking read. Betrayals between lovers, the treachery of friends, guilt demanding redress. Flaying alive both himself and the people watching him, Dovaleh G provokes both revulsion and empathy from an audience that doesn't know whether to laugh or cry - and all this in the presence of a former childhood friend who is trying to understand why he's been summoned to this performance.




Man Walks Into a Room


Book Description

A luminous and unforgettable first novel by an astonishing new voice in fiction, hailed by Esquire magazine as “one of America’s best young writers.” Samson Greene, a young and popular professor at Columbia, is found wandering in the Nevada desert. When his wife, Anna, comes to bring him home, she finds a man who remembers nothing, not even his own name. The removal of a small brain tumor saves his life, but his memories beyond the age of twelve are permanently lost. Here is the story of a keenly intelligent, sensitive man returned to a life in which everything is strange and new. An emigrant from his own life, set free from all that once defined him, Samson Greene believes he has nothing left to lose. So, when a charismatic scientist asks him to participate in a bold experiment, he agrees. Launched into a turbulent journey that takes him to the furthest extremes of solitude and intimacy, what he gains is nothing short of the revelation of what it means to be human.




Man Walks into a Bar


Book Description

A massive collection of laugh-out-loud jokes—arranged A-to-Z by subject! •Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring? He finally decided to stick it out for one more year! •A dog with three legs walks into a Wild West bar and says, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.” •Where do you get virgin wool from? An ugly sheep! •What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios? “Oh look! Donut seeds!” •The police have reported the theft of a shipment of filing cabinets, document folders, and labeling machines—it’s believed to have been the work of organized crime. Keep yourself—and friends and family—laughing with a new joke every day. This book is packed full of thousands of jokes, alphabetically organized into hundreds of topics from accountants to zebras, providing one gigantic, over-the-top, laugh-out-loud collection.




The Big Ass Book of Jokes


Book Description

A Simon & Schuster eBook. Simon & Schuster has a great book for every reader.




Love Walks on Wounded Feet


Book Description

In this new volume of sermons for the Common Lectionary (Revised), experienced preacher and pastor Bruce L. Taylor offers more theologically rich, sacramentally sensitive, and biblically centered proclamations for the Sundays and major feast days from Advent through Eastertide. As in his earlier sermon collections, readers will find in this first installment in a new series for the lectionary cycle a strong testimony to Christian unity and a deep appreciation of the heritage and contemporary relevance of the church as well as the importance of individual discipleship and commitment to prophetic servanthood. The collection includes examples of poignant story sermons which demonstrate how this style of preaching can be profound as well as engaging. Preachers, teachers of homiletics and practical theology, and devotional readers alike will find Love Walks on Wounded Feet to be a trustworthy and welcome companion for the Christian journey. Along the way, they will discover the treasures of the liturgical year and faithfully explore Matthew’s Gospel and the accompanying Scripture passages commended for use in Christian worship during Year A of the lectionary cycle.




Bruiser


Book Description

BRUISER is the story and the nickname of a nine-year-old boy living in a highly dysfunctional family in the 1970's (a bit like "The Ice Storm" on the Upper West Side) whose search for meaning and answers leads him to the open road and, eventually, the seeds of wisdom. Through the limitations of a young boy's awareness, we see the deteriorating marriage of his distant father and struggling mother, and the effects of their conflicts on Bruiser and his two older brothers. The disjunction between his literal misinterpretations, which often contain an emotional truth, and our adult understanding of the circumstances, creates the tension that runs throughout the novel. Bruiser has a kindred spirit in Darla, the prococious daughter in an already broken home who lives across the alleyway. As the tension mounts in each household, Darla conceives of a plan for the two of them that takes Bruiser on the most frightening and illuminating journey of his life, and one that will have tragic consequences.




The Staff of Ira


Book Description

A time long ago, on the planet of Boldly, a race was on the verge of extinction with little hope left to find a way to stop it. The leader and his scientist tried taking DNA from other species on the planet to create a new life form. A new life they did create, yet it was not acceptable. The scientist told the leader, A female we must have. This statement brought many questions as to how or where. The only females on the planet were infertile. As they sat and pondered as to how they would come about such females, an idea occurred. Lets build a ship, said the scientist, to carry us to other worlds in search of a female.




...But They Call Me Sonny


Book Description

Pamela lost her dad when she was three. Later she begins a search to find a grandfather presented by such a loss. Armed with a mission to find him, the facts start to skew. Clues twist and turn; and then entwine to such a degree she bumps into her dad's story. and learns the only way to find the man fate chose to leave behind is that first she must go through her dad. Both in the search, both on the same path, but forty years apart, do the gods lead them to the one they want so desperately to find. Fourteen and growing up in the streets, Sonny cant wait to leave; he lives for the day he can put all the shame behind him. But with the hard times that have hit the country and the fact all the kids depend on himwhere would he go. Its not as if he has a direction. All he has in this world is his brother Paul. and even though Paul has him by a few years, the big guy depends on him too. Naw, labeled bastards since as far back as they can rememberits just he and Paul against the rest of them. Forced to be the responsible one, he will bide his time and deal with the chaos and turmoil as it comes. That is until he finds out the secret kept; one that ignites a fire so strong that without thought leads him on a journey that will take him to all but two of the forty-eight states in the Union. Join him on his mission. Share his thoughts. Share his dreams. Life now his school, meet those that help shape the man he grows up to be. Travel with him through a period of time when millions of Americans are on the same path. A period of history now known as the Great Depression, they're all looking for a better lifeall that is except one. Sonny isnt looking for a better lifehe is looking for his life. but they call me Sonny is a book based on a real life. Does he have a dad? If so, where is he? Why would the man take off and leave him alone with Susie? Can he fill the void that aches in his heart? and is it true, was he robbed of the life he was born to live? Who are these strangers standing over your grave; ... not knowing your story and you not knowing theirs. We are the ones that know where you lie; ... yet we are the ones that wont let you die. Maybe this story will comfort our hearts; ... to bring us closer and not so far apart. We always wondered, we were always sad; ... and all we could do is call you Dad.




Salem Twilight


Book Description

Day in and day out, the harvest fields of Danvers, MA only provide endless hard labor for 17 year old Claire Proctor who desires more out of life. The longing for excitement Claire holds in her heart is fulfilled when she meets a mysterious woman. With this stranger is a secret that will change her life forever. Little does this young farmer know about the deadly fate she entangles in.