Build a Co-Parenting Team


Book Description

Note: links below connect to the non-profit educational Break the Cycle! Web site (Formerly "Stepfamily inFormation"). Close the pages or use your browser ́s "back" button to return here. Typical multi-home stepfamilies are riddled with conflicts between three or more co-parents and their relatives over child discipline, nutrition, visitations, custody, hygiene, religion, schooling, hoidays, loyalties, expenses, names, responsibilities, and other topics. The scope, complexity, and persistence of these disputes among ex mates, stepparents, and relatives can significantly contribute to eventual re/divorce. (The "/" notes it may be a stepparent ́s first union). This guidebook is part of a series intended to help co-parents and supporters overcome five common hazards that combine to (1) promote epidemic U.S. re/divorce, and (2) pass on significant psychological wounds to vulnerable children. The hazards are: co-parents ́ shared unawarenesses and ignorance of key information; plus... unseen psychological wounds from low-nurturance childhoods; plus... incomplete or blocked grief in kids and/or adults, which inhibits new bonds and adult intimacy; plus... courtship neediness and romantic illusions; plus... little informed stepfamily help in the media and local community. Typical nuclear stepfamilies include three or more co-parents (bioparents and stepparents) and several minor kids shuttling between two or more homes: Parenting effectively in this environment is far more complex than in "traditional" intact biological families - which catches typical co-parents and relatives by surprise. Why this book (and series)? Families exist to nurture - i.e. to fill key needs of their kids and adults. Most U.S. stepfamilies follow the divorce of one or both new mates, most of whom are parents. Divorce suggests that their kids weren ́t well nurtured in their first family, and have many concurrent developmental + special needs to fill in their complex stepfamily.




Combative to Collaborative


Book Description

Combative to Collaborative: The Co-parenting Code channels parents' interactions with each other to what they really want?to be good parents together. But while most co-parenting books tell parents to just put the kids first even if that means sacrificing their own happiness, Combative to Collaborative shows parents how supporting each other as good parenting partners ensures they do what's best for their kids while also achieving personal happiness. Move from anger, hurt, and loss to consideration, kindness, and cooperation.Discover how to:- Diffuse a co-parent's snarky behavior and avoid triggering their hostility- Recognize your own combative behaviors and stop exhibiting them- Plan for co-parenting collaboration and success- Correct course when a relationship goes astray - even after many years of conflict!The book is divided into three stages: Uncoupling, Life Goes On, and Correcting Course. Then each chapter lays out a roadmap for a particular area of co-parenting. Whether parents are newly separated, well into their journey, or have been at it for years, this book will guide the way. For each co-parenting topic covered...- Explore what's at stake for the child, parents, and others involved.- Identify the combative behaviors that derail parenting efforts and make life miserable for everyone.- Read True Stories to see how real parents have handled situations both successfully and not as well. As you read these stories, you'll learn what worked and what didn't and also find out you're not alone.- Learn the DOs and DON'Ts of collaborative behaviors.- Answer questions that will help you adopt an empathetic mindset, apply the Golden Rule to your situation, and achieve the positive outcome you desire.This is The Co-parenting Code!Combative to Collaborative: The Co-parenting Code is the essential guide for parents living separately to not only improve life for their children, but also for themselves and everyone that surrounds them. You can save your family. You can be happy! A painful decision does not have to mean a pain-filled life.




Ex-etiquette for Parents


Book Description

Written for both biological parents and stepparents, this helpful guide provides the tools necessary to raising well-adjusted children after a stressful divorce. Innovative in its technique and cowritten by a certified divorce and stepfamily expert and her own stepchildren's mother, this etiquette book provides an authentic guide for ex-spouses to interact on a civil and healthy level. Sample conversation for everyday scenarios help exes create a positive environment and ensure the mental and physical well-being of the children. Whether it's coordinating discipline between households, introducing a new partner, dealing with late child support payments, or providing a regular schedule for children, this guide empowers parents to change what they can--their attitudes and communication skills. In doing so, divorced parents can increase their self-esteem and personal growth and emerge confident that they can handle awkward situations and powerful emotions while keeping the children's best interests a priority.




Co-parenting 101


Book Description

A successful co-parenting relationship is as vital to your child's well-being and health as nutritious food or proper exercise. Research, anecdotal evidence, and plain common sense all point to the fact that children are happier, healthier, and better adjusted when both of their parents play an active role in their lives. Studies also show that the trauma children experience in the wake of a divorce or separation can be lessened when they see their parents getting along. Kids whose parents successfully co-parent feel more secure than those who have limited or no connection to one of their parents post divorce. Co-Parenting 101 is based on the premise that co-parenting is a must, not an option. The involvement of both parents—not just the primary guardian—is the cornerstone of successful co-parenting. This is the first book written by a formerly married couple for whom co parenting is central to their day to day lives, and it offers a comprehensive, personal, and upfront look at how to effectively raise kids with an ex-spouse. Authors Deesha Philyaw and Michael D. Thomas, the creators of the popular co-parenting website, co-parenting101.org, share their own experiences raising their children together, as well as provide professional advice from co-parenting experts. Through practical tips combined with expert parental strategies, this book a great resource for divorced parents with children. For parents, less time stressed out about legal wrangling means more time to be fully present and engaged with the children. By learning to put their animosity aside, parents can focus on putting their kids first.




The Work/Parent Switch


Book Description

You can still work and be a great parent! Most modern parents work. And we have limited time, limited energy, limited patience and too much to do. We are seldom at our best at the end of a long working day when the parenting shift kicks in. We want to do the right thing but, in the thick of it, with no time to think and no energy to spare, it’s easy to miss the small changes that could make a big difference to our child’s (and our own) well-being. The Work/Parent Switch is essential reading for every working parent. Written by an expert in child development and psychology who has worked with thousands of stressed out working parents, it will walk you through an approach to parenting that will transform family life and can be fitted into modern working patterns. Covering all the key challenges such getting everyone out of the house on time in the morning, managing difficult behaviour when you’re tired at the end of the day, controlling tech time and avoiding Sunday night homework battles, The Parent/Work Switch will help you to stop feeling guilty about being at work and give you the tools to create the family life you want to come home to.




Better Apart


Book Description

“Potent, accessible tools for your family and your future.” —Gwyneth Paltrow Marital strife and divorce can be your chance to profoundly transform yourself, your mindset and your relationship with a more harmonious and steady vision. While many of us may be better together, some of us can actually become better apart. What if you emerged from your divorce stronger and more resilient than ever before? Better Apart is the first book to apply the life-changing, healing wisdom of meditation and yoga, combined with practical advice, to help anyone going through the painful and seemingly intractable realities of divorce. Gabrielle Hartley and Elena Brower are warm and caring guides who can help you compassionately part from your partner. Whether your separation is amicable, or your ex is combative, Better Apart can help you find peace, calm, and hope. Blending practical advice from a legal perspective together with spiritual wisdom, Gabrielle and Elena are experts and realists who have created a simple five-step process that uses original meditations, perspective-shifting exercises, and fresh suggestions to help navigate the common legal and emotional pitfalls of divorce. Don’t worry if you’ve never tried yoga or mediation; Gabrielle’s insight buttressed by Elena’s practices and exercises are accessible for all. Together, they show you how to meaningfully shift your mindset and to move forward though any—or all—parts of this emotionally fraught process. Better Apart radically reframes the way couples experience, execute, and recover from when “for better or worse” is no longer an option, and helps you find the road to a new mindset and better life.




Connection Parenting


Book Description

The author believes that every child's greatest emotional need is to have a strong emotional bond with at least one adult. When we have a bond with a child we have influence with a child. The author teaches us that when we strengthen our parent-child bond we meet the child's need for connection and our need for influence.--From back cover.




Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex


Book Description

Protect your child from alienation and loyalty conflicts. During and after a difficult divorce, it’s easy for your relationship with your kids to become strained—especially if you are dealing with a toxic ex who bad-mouths you in front of your children, accuses you of being a bad parent, and even attempts to “replace” you with a new partner in your children’s lives. Your children may become confused, conflicted, angry, anxious, or depressed—and you may feel powerless. But there is help. In this guide, you’ll discover a positive parenting approach to dealing with a hostile ex-spouse. You'll learn the best ways to protect your children from painful loyalty conflicts, how to avoid parental alienation syndrome, and techniques for talking to your children in a way that fosters honesty and trust. Co-parenting with a toxic ex can be challenging, but with the right tools you can protect your kids and make your relationship with them stronger than ever.




Blend


Book Description

A wise and inspiring guide to creating a happy and healthy blended family by Mashonda Tifrere with contributions from her co-parents--Swizz Beatz and his wife, Grammy-Award winning singer and songwriter Alicia Keys. In January 2010, founder of ArtLeadHer Mashonda Tifrere and legendary record producer Swizz Beatz finalized their divorce. When Swizz married award-winning singer/songwriter Alicia Keys, a new dynamic was born--three adults who loved and were deeply committed to raising Mashonda and Swizz's four-year old son Kasseem. In Blend, Tifrere draws on the insights they gained from their journey as well as advice from family therapists, parenting experts, and other blending families, to provide an invaluable resource for blended families. Statistics show that one in three Americans is now a step-parent, stepchild, step-sibling or other member of a blended family. The number of first time marriages or romantic relationships that end in divorce or breakups and the high percentage of remarriages and new relationships that involve children demand a unique, life-affirming approach to processing the end of one relationship and the rebirth of a new familial dynamic with the well-being of children at its center. In this book, Tifrere shares intimate details on how she and her co-parents used communication, patience and love to create an environment where they were able to work as a team and all the children involved could thrive. Blend will inspire a generation of families.




The Screen Strong Solution


Book Description

Yesterday, our kids were dressing up in princess costumes and tracking mud in the house. Today, they are lost in a virtual world, obsessed with video games, social media, and smartphones. As a result, kids are getting hurt. They have become more stressed, anxious, and depressed. And families are being pulled apart. But it's not too late to win back your kids. In "The Screen Strong Solution," you will learn how to free your child from screen addiction and obsession. Based on scientific research and authentic experiences, Melanie Hempe, RN by trade and mother of four, lays out the step-by-step game plan you'll need to reclaim your kids and reconnect your family. You'll learn why your child craves screen time, what building blocks are necessary for healthy development, how to nurture the most important relationships in your child's life, and how to replace the digital world with the real one. Today is the day to rethink the screens in your home, reclaim your kids, and reconnect your family.