Gorgeous George & the Zigzag Zit-Faced Zombies. Stuart Reid


Book Description

A chemical experiment by the military has gone wrong and the toxins are now airborne. The pupils of Little Pumpington primary school are breathing in the gas and their behaviour is becoming bonkers. Do you still pick your nose? Do you sit next to someone in school who still picks their nose? Do they eat it, even in secret? The Little Pumpington nose-pickers are taking over in the school and their own bogies are not enough any more, they need to eat everybody else's too. Thses psychotic snot zombies are on the rampage, feasting on the nostril contents of the entire town and the army will do nothing to prevent them. Can Gorgeous George, Allison and Crayon Kenny find a cure before the military decide to blow up the school?







Grandpa Jock and the Incredible Iron-Bru-Man Incident


Book Description

Presidents, planets and a person called Poop. An awesome alien adventure for any age group! How would you feel if aliens landed in your back garden? What would you do if the Men in Black turned up at your front door? Probably poop your pants! (I know I would). And not just one alien. An entire army of aliens... ancient aliens... awesome aliens... Four different species of aliens, each ready to rule the world, save the world, stop the world or eat every last person on the planet! What the world needs now is a new brand of superhero! Super-duperheroes, and super-sheroes... all younger, more dynamic, more adventurous and willing to risk life and limb to leap over a paddling pool full of pee. These are the Guardians of the Garden. A new breed of superhero... Except one. He's really old. He's so old that nobody knows how old he actually is... not even the old geezer himself. Grandpa Jock makes an impressive superhero landing in his first fist-pounding, heart-pumping adventure in the Gorgeous George universe. The usual suspects, George, Allison and Crayon Kenny are there, along with the welcome return of those cool kids next door, Ben and Barbara. If you've never read a Gorgeous George adventure before, first of all, WHY NOT? and second of all, start with this one. It's like an instruction manual... This book might just save your planet! Standalone or read as part of the series.




Gorgeous George and the Jumbo Jobby Juicer


Book Description

Burgers, bottoms, baddies and burps. Power Pink, pumping and poop! The circus is coming to town and Grandpa Jock has almost wet himself with excitement and George's suspicions are aroused when the circus elephants begin dumping piles of pink poo on the pavement.




Gorgeous George and the Timewarp Trouser Trumpets


Book Description

Ever wanted a book so exciting it keeps you up past your bedtime? A story so mad that you're scared to put it down in case the adventure goes on inside the pages after you've stopped reading? This book is a big ball of wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff (Who?) that loops & swoops & poops & pops out to the shops, then meets itself coming back!




Let's Spend the Night Together


Book Description

Presents biographies of twenty-four rock groupies in their own words, including Tura Satana, Miss Mercy, Cynthia Plaster Caster, and Miss B.




Gorgeous George and His Stupid Stinky Stories


Book Description

Long stories, short stories, tall stories, funny stories. Yucky stories, lucky stories and even some mucky stories. Stories good enough to grace any book. Stories gross enough to make you want to puke. WARNING: This book contains words like BUM, POO, BARF and WEE. Do NOT read this book if you are easily offended. You have been warned!




Gorgeous George and the Unidentified Unsinkable Underpants Part 1


Book Description

Pumping, parping and poo! Plesiosaurs, porridge and pants! Gorgeous George and his wacky old Grandpa Jock are off to Loch Ness to track down a monster. There's something out there and it wees in the water! 'Stuart Reid is funnyer than David Walyums!' wrote Ben, aged 8




The Oxford Dictionary of Modern Slang


Book Description

A dictionary of modern slang draws on the resources of the "Oxford English Dictionary" to cover over five thousand slang words and phrases from throughout the English-speaking world.




Hag Storm


Book Description

In 1771, Robert Burns, future national poet and folk hero of Scotland, has big problems.12-year-old Rab spends all of his time doing backbreaking work on his family's farm instead of attending school, but when he finds a hag stone in one of the fields, everything changes.Looking through its circular hole, he sees witches gathering in a coming storm, and they've set their sights on his family. Can Rab save his sisters from the clutches of the witches' coven before their Halloween ceremony in the old kirk?Filled with mystery and magic, Hag Storm is a spooky, historical adventure with a supernatural twist, based on the life of Robert Burns and one of his most famous and best-loved poems, Tam O'Shanter.