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How to Raise a Jewish Dog

Author : Rabbis of Boca Raton Theological Seminary

Publisher : Little, Brown

Page : 124 pages

File Size : 44,77 MB

Release : 2007-09-05

Category : Humor

ISBN : 0316015296

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Book Description

From the authors of the bestselling Yiddish with Dick and Jane and Yiddish with George and Laura, this essential "guide" is sure to be a complete howl. Questions to Ask a Breeder: 1. What kind of job is this, growing dogs? 2. Are these dogs nice? I mean of course they are. But if not, is this refundable? 3. Is this a stable business? Do you make a decent living? 4. Does the insurance kill you or is it okay? 5. Dogs are animals, does this mean you qualify for some kind of Federal ranch subsidies? 6. What do I say to people who want to know how I can spend $1500 and up on a dog when there are so many dogs to be rescued from the pound? The (make-believe) Rabbis of the (fictional) Boca Raton Theological Seminary have developed the essential dog training program for raising a Jewish dog. For the first time, the same dynamic blend of passive-aggressiveness and smothering indulgence, that unique alloy of infantilization and disingenuous manipulation that created generations of high-achieving Jewish boys and girls, can be applied to create a generation of high-achieving Jewish doggies.



Yiddish with Dick and Jane

Author : Ellis Weiner

Publisher : Little Brown

Page : 34 pages

File Size : 42,33 MB

Release : 2014-05-21

Category : FOREIGN LANGUAGE STUDY

ISBN : 9780316145701

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Book Description

"Oy vey"--this is a primer like no other. In an inspired parodic twist, the two least Jewish characters in American literature spout some of the edgy, ironic Yiddishisms that have become part of the American vernacular. 35 full-color drawings.



Jewish as a Second Language

Author : Molly Katz

Publisher : Workman Publishing

Page : 193 pages

File Size : 44,69 MB

Release : 2010-01-01

Category : Humor

ISBN : 0761158405

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Book Description

In this completely revised, updated, and expanded second edition of "Jewish as a Second Language," Katz shows how to worry, interrupt, and say the opposite of what one means.



Yiddish with George and Laura

Author : Barbara Davilman

Publisher : Little, Brown

Page : 57 pages

File Size : 40,22 MB

Release : 2008-11-15

Category : Humor

ISBN : 0316050202

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Book Description

What do George and Laura Bush have in common with Dick and Jane? Well, both hail from prototypical WASP families. And, perhaps more to the point, both exhibit a natural resistance to moral complexity (i.e., reality). That's the premise of this hilarious new primer-style book in which George, Laura, and the entire Bush family communicate with uncharacteristic expressiveness, conveying shades of of feeling and nuances of meaning that plain old English can't deliver -- by peppering their conversatuon with Yiddishisms. See George's mother. Her name is Bar. She wears a lot of pearls and is a farbisseneh. "You are late, George," Bar says. "Of course I am late," George says. "I am the President of the United States. I am a big macher." Like all good primers, Yiddish with George and Laura tells a simple story -- and, in the end, important life lessons are imparted.



Is Your Dog Jewish?

Author : Leo Dworken

Publisher : Running Press Book Publishers

Page : 154 pages

File Size : 43,23 MB

Release : 1989

Category : History

ISBN :

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Book Description

A funny, serious, trivial, and thought-provoking collection, Is Your Dog Jewish? asks contemporary questions of identity, age-old philosophical dilemmas, and humorous questions of guilt. 2-color throughout.



The Jewish Dog

Author : Asher Kravitz

Publisher :

Page : 0 pages

File Size : 22,59 MB

Release : 2015

Category : Dogs

ISBN : 9780983868538

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Book Description

"Originally published in Hebrew as HaKelev HaYehudi by Yedioth Ahronoth in 2007; translated by Michal Kessler; edited by Shari Dash Greenspan"--Title page verso.



Yiddish for Dogs

Author : Janet Perr

Publisher : Hyperion

Page : 0 pages

File Size : 45,45 MB

Release : 2007-09-18

Category : Humor

ISBN : 9781401303235

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Book Description

Is your dog a shmendrick A putz Oroy veya goniff There is only one way to find out, so nu, dive in to Yiddish for Dogs. This alphabetical handbook of Yiddish words features adorable and hilarious pictures of irresistible pooches. These dogs embody the meaning of well-known words such as kibbitz, tsuris, feh!, shlep, chutzpah, and many more. But thats not all. Consider yourself warned. Once the Yiddish comes out, these dogs have much to say. These dogs kvell. They go through the dreck. They recognize a mensch. They appreciate a nosh. And, believe it or not, they know youre mishuggeh. So the next time your canine friend does a flying leap into your lap, instead of exclaiming, What a klutz!, ask yourself Does my dog want to kibbitz Written and illustrated by award-winning art director and graphic designer Janet Perr, Yiddish for Dogs will have you howling with laughter.



Working Like a Dog

Author : Gena K. Gorrell

Publisher : Tundra Books

Page : 216 pages

File Size : 25,33 MB

Release : 2009-05-08

Category : Juvenile Nonfiction

ISBN : 1770490310

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Book Description

Winner of The 2003 ASPCA Henry Bergh Children’s Book Award Included on VOYA’s ninth annual Nonfiction Honor List Since the first hungry wolf bravely approached an ancient cooking fire and was rewarded with a scrap of meat, our lives and the lives of dogs have been interwoven. Dogs have worked for us as warriors with ammunition strapped to their bodies. Dogs have gone through snow, icy seas, and into the dangerous rubble of collapsed buildings to rescue us. Dogs, with their spectacular ability to detect odors, keep us safe by finding drugs and explosives. They lead us if we cannot see and react for us when we cannot hear. Most of all, they love us – and we love them. This fascinating book by Norma Fleck Award-winner, Gena K. Gorrell, describes the dogs of history, the evolution of breeds for different purposes, and the training involved in preparing the modern-day heroes who find lost children, nab criminals, and point out contraband – heroes who just happen to be dogs.



The Big Jewish Book for Jews

Author : Ellis Weiner

Publisher : Penguin

Page : 281 pages

File Size : 34,47 MB

Release : 2010-07-27

Category : Humor

ISBN : 1101457112

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Book Description

A hilarious compendium of traditional wisdom, recipes, and lore from the authors of the bestselling Yiddish with Dick and Jane. Modern Jews have forgotten cherished traditions and become, sadly, all- too assimilated. It's enough to make you meshugeneh. Today's Jews need to relearn the old ways so that cultural identity means something other than laughing knowingly at Curb Your Enthusiasm- and The Big Jewish Book for Jews is here to help. This wise and wise-cracking fully-illustrated book offers invaluable instruction on everything from how to sacrifice a lamb unto the lord to the rules of Mahjong. Jews of all ages and backgrounds will welcome the opportunity to be the Jewiest Jew of all, and reconnect to ancestors going all the way back to Moses and a time when God was the only GPS a Jew needed.



Monsters of the Ivy League

Author : Ellis Weiner

Publisher : Little, Brown

Page : 503 pages

File Size : 17,27 MB

Release : 2017-04-11

Category : Humor

ISBN : 0316465283

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Book Description

Everybody knows that the schools of the Ivy League -- universally touted as the pinnacle of American higher education -- have graduated countless political leaders, corporate titans, and global power brokers. But did you know these schools have also produced murderers, warmongers, traitors, plagiarists, slave traders, pederasts, and every other variety of moral reprobate? Whether you're a high school student grinding away in the hope of gaining admission to one of these institutions, a parent propelling a child toward Ivy glory, a current Ivy League undergraduate wondering "What the hell is this place?" -- or even an Ivy League alum, professor, administrator, or dropout -- this book was written specifically for you. As a warning. Because there are certain things -- monstrous things -- that go unmentioned in the catalog, campus tour, or employment package. And if your Ivy League application was rejected, here's compelling and consoling evidence of how lucky you are.