Idiots in Love


Book Description

Here's best-selling humor writer Leland Gregory's sixth collection about everyday idiots-and this time they're in love! Readers are guaranteed to feel better about their own romantic misadventures after reading these jaw-dropping, hilarious tales. Many people do crazy things in the name of love, but some people take things way too far. From failed seductions to botched proposals, from disturbing displays of affection to misguided marriages, Idiots in Love chronicles the stupid things falling in love (or falling out of it) can drive people to do: * A female Coca-Cola employee became engaged to a Pepsi employee, and Coke demanded that she break it off, persuade her fiance to leave Pepsi, or resign from Coca-Cola. She refused and was terminated, but she later won a $600,000 settlement from the company. * A woman in Hardwick, Georgia, divorced her husband on the grounds that he "stayed home too much and was too affectionate." * A couple started divorce proceedings after 90 minutes of marriage. * A Norwegian woman hid a ring in her boyfriend's porridge to propose marriage to him, but he accidentally ate the ring. Fortunately, he accepted the proposal anyway. * In Whitesville, Delaware, it is illegal for a woman to propose to a man. * A European survey revealed that one in nine people admit to sending themselves Valentine's Day cards. Once again, Leland Gregory finds the absolute best and funniest anecdotes and one-liners that will have readers rolling with laughter at the amorous antics of idiots in love.




Idiots in Love


Book Description

From failed seductions to botched proposals, from disturbing displays of affection to misguided marriages, "Idiots in Love" chronicles the stupid things falling in love can drive people to do.




How To Live With An Idiot


Book Description

Ultimate success in living happily with an idiot-whether spouse, child, other relative or roommate-depends upon your willingness to search out and embrace your own inner idiot. We all have one. By learning the art of setting realistic expectations, resentments will diminish and relationships can be rekindled based on strengths rather than continuing to whither on weaknesses. This book offers practical, useful advice for all of us who have to deal with the many true idiots in our lives, but helps us laugh at them, too.




Idiots


Book Description

A fresh, hilarious, and relatable collection of essays about everything from motherhood and marriage to sobriety and work-life balance (or imbalance) from the nationally bestselling author of the “honest, complicated” (SheKnows) Idiot. TRIGGER WARNING: TORN EVERYTHING! In her first book, Idiot, bestselling author Laura Clery gave us mind-blowingly personal life stories about addiction, toxic relationships, and recovery—establishing herself as the preeminent voice of infinite conviction meets zero impulse control. Here she is two kids later asking, “How did we get here?” Sex. Sex is how we got here. Laura’s life has changed a great deal since she wrote Idiot, but her hilarious candor has only increased with motherhood—plus she tells some of the stories she was too scared to tell in her first book (which is really saying something). “Full of wit” (Publishers Weekly) and charm, Laura shares more than anyone wanted about: -Placenta pills, mom brain, and vibrator manifestation -Nipple-twisting orgies and flinging a butt burrito in your doctor’s face -ADHD, autism, postpartum depression, and the wisdom of a ninety-eight-year-old sage named Anne -Unsolicited dick, sexual assault, and sister-drugging -Cheating, fights, and forgiveness -Choosing love over fear and healing the world Laura does not hold back when it comes to sharing stories of screw-ups, triumphs, and learning from her mistakes. Whether she’s crying into a diaper in a Whole Foods parking lot or desperately soliciting advice from a random elderly stranger (who has most certainly considered a restraining order), Laura is able to laugh at herself even during her worst moments—more importantly, she makes us laugh, cry, and feel less alone in the world.




An Idiot in Love


Book Description

"Raw, raunchy, laugh-out-loud funny, and surprisingly affecting, An Idiot In Love is a deeply relatable page-turner. The honesty, candor, and humor of David Jester's prose is something to be admired and enjoyed. I loved this book!" —Davy Rothbart, author of My Heart is an Idiot and creator of FOUND magazine Kieran’s love life didn’t get off to a good start. He threw up after his first kiss; he was beaten up by the first girl to have a crush on him; and after a mix-up with his first love letter, he could only sit back and watch as the entire school mistook him for a brutal murderer. By the time the hormones kicked in, Kieran had all but given up on love, but the worst was yet to come. Relying on advice from friends who are just as dumb and just as clueless, Kieran weaves a stuttering, stumbling path through the world of adult dating. He lacks decorum, charisma, confidence—everything he needs to succeed. Despite that, there is one girl who changes him, one girl who eases his nerves and gives him hope. She is everything he had hoped for: beautiful, generous, funny—and she didn’t turn tail and run when she first saw him. But then, she disappears. Will Kieran find her again? And if he does, can his luck hold long enough to make a relationship with her last? What are the chances that all the mishaps and misadventures that go before, between, and after will put him off dating for good? An Idiot in Love chronicles a series of unfortunate sexual encounters and relationships that every reader can appreciate and sympathize with.




The Idiot


Book Description

A New York Times Book Review Notable Book • Finalist for the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction • Longlisted for the Women's Prize for Fiction “Easily the funniest book I’ve read this year.” —GQ “Masterly funny debut novel . . . Erudite but never pretentious, The Idiot will make you crave more books by Batuman.” —Sloane Crosley, Vanity Fair A portrait of the artist as a young woman. A novel about not just discovering but inventing oneself. The year is 1995, and email is new. Selin, the daughter of Turkish immigrants, arrives for her freshman year at Harvard. She signs up for classes in subjects she has never heard of, befriends her charismatic and worldly Serbian classmate, Svetlana, and, almost by accident, begins corresponding with Ivan, an older mathematics student from Hungary. Selin may have barely spoken to Ivan, but with each email they exchange, the act of writing seems to take on new and increasingly mysterious meanings. At the end of the school year, Ivan goes to Budapest for the summer, and Selin heads to the Hungarian countryside, to teach English in a program run by one of Ivan's friends. On the way, she spends two weeks visiting Paris with Svetlana. Selin's summer in Europe does not resonate with anything she has previously heard about the typical experiences of American college students, or indeed of any other kinds of people. For Selin, this is a journey further inside herself: a coming to grips with the ineffable and exhilarating confusion of first love, and with the growing consciousness that she is doomed to become a writer. With superlative emotional and intellectual sensitivity, mordant wit, and pitch-perfect style, Batuman dramatizes the uncertainty of life on the cusp of adulthood. Her prose is a rare and inimitable combination of tenderness and wisdom; its logic as natural and inscrutable as that of memory itself. The Idiot is a heroic yet self-effacing reckoning with the terror and joy of becoming a person in a world that is as intoxicating as it is disquieting. Batuman's fiction is unguarded against both life's affronts and its beauty--and has at its command the complete range of thinking and feeling which they entail. Named one the best books of the year by Refinery29 • Mashable One • Elle Magazine • The New York Times • Bookpage • Vogue • NPR • Buzzfeed •The Millions




The Complete Idiot's Guide to the Chemistry of Love


Book Description

The Complete Idiot's Guide® to the Chemistry of Love shares the amazing new findings about the chemical reactions that create what people call "love." With the help of neuroscience, biochemistry, and physiology, readers can finally get some real insight into the affairs of the heart and the actual "laws of attraction." • Covers the role of pheromones, neurotransmitters, and hormones that occur during sexual attraction and lead to the euphoria of "love" • Includes information on how readers can use this knowledge to enhance their significant relationships, both romantic and nonromantic




Becoming a Vincent


Book Description

When you live in a place where "turbo speed" internet is a slight step above dial-up, men carry on nine-year beard-growing challenges out of stubborn pride, and your brothers do things like nail all your panties to the outside of your cabin just for funsies, you tend to be a little crazy. You can call it a "locational" hazard, if you will.That's Tomahawk for you.We rank people based on just how crazy they are. And the four craziest families in town are called the Wild Ones.I'm on the bottom tier of those, so technically I'm not as crazy as the other Wild Ones. In fact, if it wasn't for my brothers and their endless antics, I wouldn't be considered a Wild One at all. Ahem. Sure. We'll go with that.Anyway, I have a best friend who endures it all with me. Benson Nolans is my one, constant favorite person.Without him, I'd probably go really crazy, and not the fun kind. It'd be ridiculous, after three years of a flawless friendship, to mess that all up by falling for him.I mean, even if we did get a little too close one night, it'd be reckless endangerment. Even if we did suddenly feel the chemistry that's always been there and stop toeing the line, it'd be a foolish risk to take.It'd be stupid to start hoping a really fun, but completely irrational, night with zero inhibitions might accidentally happen.Really stupid...Right?*NO cliffhanger*Stand-alone book*Sexual Content*Adult language*Completely, 100% crazy




Destined to Win


Book Description

Pastor and cofounder of the Bethel School of Ministry Kris Vallotton walks Christians through the profound process of discovering their true identity and experiencing the wonder of their kingdom purposes. Christians are often told that they were born with a purpose that reaches beyond their human strivings, but most are not sure how to break past the daily struggles holding them back, much less how to fully step into their callings. As a pastor and the cofounder of the Bethel School of Ministry, Kris Vallotton has been teaching Christians all over the world how to walk in wholeness and purpose for more than seventeen years. In Destined to Win, he passes on the lessons that will help readers discover who they really are, overcome destructive behaviors, and become equipped for their kingdom purposes. Confronting the challenges that limit Christians—such as living shackled by past pain, fear, and unforgiveness—Vallotton offers practical solutions to the of­ten-complex problems that undermine their destinies and derail their pur­poses. With personal stories and biblical teaching, Destined to Win combines practical wisdom and profound revelation to unlock the latent potential present in each person.




Romance


Book Description

No relationship is truly alive without romance, and Dr. Fagan (aka Dr. Romance) is prepped to teach her readers everything they need to know to keep the romance alive in their relationships. From romantic e-mails, faxes, and phone calls to writing love letters, watching romantic movies, or initiating the perfect romantic seduction, The Complete Idiot's Guide to Romance is bound to help every reader obtain romantic fulfillment.