Book Description

The idea to write fictional letters to marital couples on how to use God's lifetime warranty on their marriages came into being in the process of a sermon preparation as a guest pastor for a local church in November 2011. I prayed about which message to deliver for many days. About two days before Sunday, I had a dream that a young lady participated during my sermon. After the sermon, her family greeted me well and said I made her speak in public for the first time and I gave her the encouragement that she needs for the rest of her life. Then I woke up. On the actual Sunday service, during the sermon, I asked the congregation how many of them had a dog or a cat. A young lady - a 17 year old said she had a cat. I asked if she ever took her cat for a walk, she said, "no." I asked, "why not?" She replied, "Nobody does!" Then I said people take their dogs for walks, but this does not mean that dogs are more important or better than cats. Cats have their own usefulness. God who created us knows that we are not the same and that we cannot function in the same way. One should not be boasting that s/he is better than the other. After the service, the grandfather of the cat owner who spoke during my sermon and her aunt came to me and thanked me for the opportunity given to the young lady to talk for the first time in public, which would enable her to express herself publicly. When I was praying at home after the sermon, I had the feeling that God wanted me to tell people to try out what seems to be unusual for them. It has been my concern for many years that many couples don't take their wedding vows seriously. It is affecting children a great deal; many children have two or three stepparents. Those children without stepparents seem to be the odd ones among their peers. In Canada, about 50% of first marriages may likely end up in divorce. One may presume that the rate of divorce in second marriages would be lower, but instead it is higher at 72% while, third marriages have the highest divorce rate of 85% (Comparative Annual Divorce Rate in Canada). Similarly, in America, the first marriage divorce rate ranges from 41 - 50%; second marriage divorce rate is between 60-67% and third marriage is between 73-74%. (Information on Divorce Rate and Statistics). This book is fictional. The stories are not real stories. They are about my past experiences with heterosexual couples in my counseling or pastoral care. I do not have a particular person or couple in mind. No names in the book are real names. If anybody's name or any couples have the same names as used in the book, I would like them to know that I am not telling their particular story or using them as an example. The Holy Spirit inspired the writers of the bible stories/instructions/messages and the same Holy Spirit is still talking to us today. I believe, I was inspired to write the book. I will encourage anyone or couple whose story or stories are similar to what's in the book not to be too critical but to take it (the book) as a means through which God is speaking to them to change. No marriage is too bad that God cannot change for better. Don't fold your arms and accept your troubled marriage as a done deal. I will advise the readers to call upon the author of marriage, God through Jesus Christ, to fix their marriages. He is able. Since the idea of letter writing is becoming obsolete, one may be wondering why letters to marital couples, and not email, text, or any other modern means of communication. Letter writing is an old form of communication, which is to inform, correct, and educate. In the New Testament, there are many letters written by Paul the apostle and others to individuals and churches to deal with issues, circumstances, and problems faced by the recipients. We never read about their responses or their initial letters to the Apostles. Similarly, only letters written to the couples are featured in this book. Most of the Letters in this book are long term correspondence with the imaginary couples. The objectives of the letters are to: 1). Encourage couples not to give up on their dream of having a successful marriage and to continue fighting until the victory is won. 2). Enable the counsellors/pastors to keep their counselees' hope alive as long as they are still interested in counselling. 3). Help families and friends to keep on supporting the couples in crises. Note that some of the letters end with prayer, while some didn't. The idea is we don't have to impose prayer on people. Praying with people is as important as praying for people in absentia. We need permission to pray with people, but we don't need permission to pray for people while they are not there. In both my pastoral and counselling ministries, the most prevalent issues are marriage and family matters. This book thus serves as a handbook to help couples in crises or prevent couples from getting into a marital mess. It can be used in marriage enrichment groups or as a counsellor/Pastor's handbook. The group Leaders, Counsellors or Pastors should not use the book as a weapon of judgment against anyone, but as a means of correction and education. The book is calling people who just want a family and not a marriage. Many couples lose love in their marriages. Love is the greatest gift God gives to people but many people do not accept it. They choose anger instead of peace or love from God. The book is calling the readers who are making wrong decisions for wrong reasons. We should not let bitterness, anger, frustration, alcohol, drugs, etc., ruin our marital relationships. The principles of marital solutions in the book focus on God. May God bless you as you read the it. Shalom!