Oh, the Places You'll Eff Up


Book Description

This hilarious graduation keepsake exposes the not-always-awesome realities of becoming an adult in bitingly satirical verse. Congrats! Congrats! You’ve made it so far. You’re an adult now, you’re even allowed in a bar. But long before you’re going to succeed, You’ll eff shit up, 100% guaranteed. This off-beat (and off-color) volume of illustrated comic verse offers an honest assessment of what’s in store for those with the misfortune of just entering the workforce. It is the perfect graduation present for any young adult who needs a dose of reality—or a good laugh.




Oh, the Places You'll Eff Up


Book Description

A HILARIOUS GRADUATION KEEPSAKE THAT GLEEFULLY EXPOSES THE NOT-ALWAYS-AWESOME REALITIES OF STARTING OUT IN THE ADULT WORLD Congrats! Congrats! You've made it so far. You're an adult now, you're even allowed in a bar. But long before you're going to succeed, You'll eff shit up, 100% guaranteed. This ultimate graduation present is sure to bring a nervous smile to the face of any young adult about to face the wide world.




H.M.S. Pinafore


Book Description




Go the F**k to Sleep


Book Description

The #1 New York Times Bestseller: “A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep” (NPR). “Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.” Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.




Oh, the Places You'll Eff Up


Book Description

Discover the ups and downs of post-college life in this hilarious keepsake graduation gift that parodies Seuss' classic for the modern age. Congrats! Congrats! You've made it so far. You're an adult now, you're even allowed in a bar. But long before you're going to succeed, You'll eff shit up, 100% guaranteed. This ultimate graduation present is sure to bring a nervous smile to the face of any young adult about to face the wide world.




Goodnight Dorm Room


Book Description

A BITTERSWEET AND HUMOROUS GUIDE TO COLLEGE LIFE FEATURING PRACTICAL TIPS COMBINED WITH FUNNY, FULL COLOR ILLUSTRATIONS You're off to college--it's gonna be life-changing Follow this book's advice to make it amazing - What to pack, what to leave behind - Which classes to pick - How TAs can save your brain - Why flip flops are a must - How often to change your sheets - Where to make new friends - How to balance class and fun - And more




A Zombie's History of the United States


Book Description

Learn the American history they don’t teach in school—like colonial zombie massacres and undead Civil War heroes—in this horrifying and hilarious volume. “Americans have been taught that their nation is civilized and humane. But, too often, U.S. actions have been uncivilized and inhumane.” —Howard Zinn Shedding light on 500 years of suppression, this shocking exposé reveals the pivotal role in American history played by its most invisible minority—zombies. From colonization and revolution to World Wars and global hegemony, A Zombie’s History of the United States tells the powerful and moving stories of this country’s living-dead underclass, including: •The zombie massacre of European colonists at Plymouth Rock •The gruesome killing of a zombinated Meriwether Lewis by his fellow explorer William Clark •The doomed defense of the Alamo against hordes of the attacking undead •The heroic, platoon-saving charge into a hail of German fire by an undead Lt. Audie Murphy •The top-secret NASA missions that launched (and often lost) zombies into space •The anti-terrorist program to stop the weaponization of the zombie virus




The Waking Engine


Book Description

Welcome to the City Unspoken, where Gods and Mortals come to die. Contrary to popular wisdom, death is not the end, nor is it a passage to some transcendent afterlife. Those who die merely awake as themselves on one of a million worlds, where they are fated to live until they die again, and wake up somewhere new. All are born only once, but die many times . . . until they come at last to the City Unspoken, where the gateway to True Death can be found. Wayfarers and pilgrims are drawn to the City, which is home to murderous aristocrats, disguised gods and goddesses, a sadistic faerie princess, immortal prostitutes and queens, a captive angel, gangs of feral Death Boys and Charnel Girls . . . and one very confused New Yorker. Late of Manhattan, Cooper finds himself in a City that is not what it once was. The gateway to True Death is failing, so that the City is becoming overrun by the Dying, who clot its byzantine streets and alleys . . . and a spreading madness threatens to engulf the entire metaverse. Richly imaginative, David Edison's The Waking Engine is a stunning debut by a major new talent.




Co-WRECKER


Book Description

What do ice cream and Sadie Montgomery have in common? They're both ice cold, but one taste is never enough.I wanted to be friends - I would have even settled for her seeing me as anything but a nerd - but there was no getting through. So just like any hard-headed, red-blooded man out there, I made up my mind.I'd make my coworker fall for me.I'd like to say it was simple, but like every other epic love story, all it took was one drunken night and a lot of naked courage to get the girl. For a moment, at least.Love with a coworker is never simple, especially since Sadie's trying to keep us on the low. Not to mention her persistent ex-boyfriend who won't leave her alone. But I've never been good at giving up, and I don't plan to start now.The whole thing is a recipe for a rocky road, but I plan to eat the whole gallon, no matter how bad the brain freeze.




Hyperbole and a Half


Book Description

#1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!