Old Farts: A Spotter's Guide


Book Description

This newest title in the wildly popular Spotter's Guide series leads readers through the distinct field marks of flatulence in the latter years of life, from "The Crank" (the fart that chases pesky kids—and everyone else—off the lawn) through "The ReAnimator" (the sudden eruption of post-holiday meal flatulence that brings Great Aunt Gladys back from the brink). Each spread is devoted to a singular fart profile and includes helpful information such as age of onset, key characteristics for identification, and prominent subtypes. Detailed "in situ" illustrations and ten distinct push-button sounds complete this indispensable reference to farting happily and healthfully into the autumn years of life.




Jurassic Farts


Book Description

In prehistoric times, majestic dinosaurs walked the earth. Though long extinct, one important question remains—did dinosaurs fart? You bet! From booming Brachiosaurus to the terrible tooting T. Rex, this amusing audiobook not only includes stats on the funniest dinosaur farts but also the sound effects that go with them. Just tap each fart and let 'er rip!




Farts in the Wild


Book Description

From tiny bubble-popping goldfish toots to thunderously loud elephant gas, learn how to spot the funniest (and smelliest) farts in the animal kingdom! Hilarious tidbits identify the odor, range, frequency, and aftereffects of ten different types of gassy expulsions, while the attached battery-powered fart machine reproduces each emanation with astounding accuracy. This is pure, unbridled entertainment for the giggling child in all of us. Let 'er rip!




Everything Sad Is Untrue


Book Description

A National Indie Bestseller An NPR Best Book of the Year A New York Times Best Book of the Year An Amazon Best Book of the Year A Booklist Editors' Choice A BookPage Best Book of the Year A NECBA Windows & Mirrors Selection A Publishers Weekly Best Book of the Year A Wall Street Journal Best Book of the Year A Today.com Best of the Year PRAISE "A modern masterpiece." —The New York Times Book Review "Supple, sparkling and original." —The Wall Street Journal "Mesmerizing." —TODAY.com "This book could change the world." —BookPage "Like nothing else you've read or ever will read." —Linda Sue Park "It hooks you right from the opening line." —NPR SEVEN STARRED REVIEWS ★ "A modern epic." —Kirkus Reviews, starred review ★ "A rare treasure of a book." —Publishers Weekly, starred review ★ "A story that soars." —The Bulletin, starred review ★ "At once beautiful and painful." —School Library Journal, starred review ★ "Raises the literary bar in children's lit." —Booklist, starred review ★ "Poignant and powerful." —Foreword Reviews, starred review ★ "One of the most extraordinary books of the year." —BookPage, starred review A sprawling, evocative, and groundbreaking autobiographical novel told in the unforgettable and hilarious voice of a young Iranian refugee. It is a powerfully layered novel that poses the questions: Who owns the truth? Who speaks it? Who believes it? "A patchwork story is the shame of the refugee," Nayeri writes early in the novel. In an Oklahoman middle school, Khosrou (whom everyone calls Daniel) stands in front of a skeptical audience of classmates, telling the tales of his family's history, stretching back years, decades, and centuries. At the core is Daniel's story of how they became refugees—starting with his mother's vocal embrace of Christianity in a country that made such a thing a capital offense, and continuing through their midnight flight from the secret police, bribing their way onto a plane-to-anywhere. Anywhere becomes the sad, cement refugee camps of Italy, and then finally asylum in the U.S. Implementing a distinct literary style and challenging western narrative structures, Nayeri deftly weaves through stories of the long and beautiful history of his family in Iran, adding a richness of ancient tales and Persian folklore. Like Scheherazade of One Thousand and One Nights in a hostile classroom, Daniel spins a tale to save his own life: to stake his claim to the truth. EVERYTHING SAD IS UNTRUE (a true story) is a tale of heartbreak and resilience and urges readers to speak their truth and be heard.




Fly Guy and the Alienzz (Fly Guy #18)


Book Description

A hysterical, action-packed outer space adventure for Fly Guy and Buzz in the New York Times bestselling Fly Guy series. Buzz is making a movie about aliens from outer space. When the action begins, superheroes Fly Guy and Buzz Boy are protecting a secret fort in the sky when an alien ship captures them! The duo must outsmart the aliens and the space pirates with the help of Dragon Dude and Fly Girl. The fun-zee is never-ending in this early chapter book.




Bob Ross' Happy Little Night Before Christmas


Book Description

An instant holiday classic. A happy little Christmas miracle. Even after more than 20 years after his death, pop culture icon, painter, host, and teacher Bob Ross has never been more heralded than he is today. His memorable quotes, friendly face, and signature hairstyle grace merchandise and memes around the world. But what makes Bob as beloved as he is are ultimately his core values, and his peaceful, joyful demeanor that encouraged his students and viewers to not only appreciate their natural talents but to appreciate the natural world around them. Bob was, in many respects, the embodiment of the classic holiday sprint which encourages peace on Earth and good will toward men. Now, for the first time, inspired by the classic Clement C. Moore’s story, this fully-authorized tale of a painter (and his little squirrel friend) on a cold winter night pairs Bob Ross's most beautiful wintertime landscapes with a meditation on embracing not only your inner creativity, but the beauty of nature, and the feelings of peace, friendship, and harmony that blankets the entire holiday season like a happy little snowfall. Perfect for families, fans, and painters of all ages, Bob Ross’s Happy Little Night Before Christmas is the perfect addition to any holiday tradition.




Farts Around the World


Book Description

What is proper English etiquette for a tea room emission? Can a Swiss fart be so loud that it generates an echo? If a meditating Buddhist passes gas, does it exist? The answers to such pressing questions are answered in this hilarious soon-to-be international best seller. Ingeniously packaged with a sound unit to convey the nuances of global flatulence, Farts Around the World is the ideal gift for those who like to travel with a smile.




The Big Book of Farts


Book Description

This wonderfully quirky, laugh out loud book is the PERFECT GIFT for FART lovers of all ages.




What's Your Poo Telling You?


Book Description

"With universal appeal (everyone poops, after all), this witty, illustrated description of over two dozen dookies (each with a medical explanation written by a doctor) details what one can learn about health and well-being by studying what's in the bowl. A floater? It's probably due to a buildup of gas. Now think back on last night's dinner, a burrito perhaps? . . .All the greatest hits are here: The Log Jam, The Glass Shard, The Deja Poo, The Hanging Chad ... the list goes on. Sidebars, trivia, over 60 euphemisms for number 2, and unusual case histories all make this the ultimate bathroom reader. Who knew you could learn so much from your poo?"--Publisher website (October 2007)




Effin' Birds


Book Description

A compact, comprehensive, and very silly field guide featuring more than 200 of the rudest birds on earth—from the creator of the Webby Award–winning hit Instagram account! Effin’ Birds is the most eagerly anticipated new volume in the grand and noble profession of nature writing and bird identification. Sitting proudly alongside Sibley, Kaufman, and Peterson, this book contains more than 150 pages crammed full of classic, monochrome plumage art paired with the delightful but dirty aphorisms (think “I’m going to need more booze to deal with this week”) that made the Effin’ Birds feed a household name. Also included in its full, Technicolor glory is John James Audubon’s most beautiful work matched with modern life advice. Including never-before-seen birds, insults, and field notes, this guide is a must-have for any effin’ fan or birder.