Hola Papi


Book Description

LGBTQ advice columnist John Paul Brammer writes a “wise and charming” (David Sedaris) memoir-in-essays chronicling his journey from a queer, mixed-race kid in America’s heartland to becoming the “Chicano Carrie Bradshaw” of his generation. “A master class of tone and tenderness.” —The New York Times Book Review (Editors’ Choice) “Should be required reading.” —Los Angeles Times The first time someone called John Paul (JP) Brammer “Papi” was on the gay hookup app Grindr. At first, it was flattering; JP took this as white-guy speak for “hey, handsome.” But then it happened again and again…and again, leaving JP wondering: Who the hell is Papi? Soon, this racialized moniker became the inspiration for his now wildly popular advice column “¡Hola Papi!,” launching his career as the Cheryl Strayed for young queer people everywhere—and some straight people too. JP had his doubts at first—what advice could he really offer while he himself stumbled through his early twenties? Sometimes the best advice comes from looking within, which is what JP does in his column and book—and readers have flocked to him for honest, heartfelt wisdom, and more than a few laughs. In this hilarious, tenderhearted book, JP shares his story of growing up biracial and in the closet in America’s heartland, while attempting to answer some of life’s most challenging questions: How do I let go of the past? How do I become the person I want to be? Is there such a thing as being too gay? Should I hook up with my grade school bully now that he’s out of the closet? Questions we’ve all asked ourselves, surely. ¡Hola Papi! is “a warm, witty compendium of hard-won life lessons,” (Harper’s Bazaar) for anyone—gay, straight, and everything in between—who has ever taken stock of their unique place in the world.




Straight Acting


Book Description

Fed up with the fact that men have a shorter shelf life than sushi? Finding, let alone building, a strong relationship can still be challenging for gay men. The reason? Masculinity. All men, gay or straight, have been socialized to believe that to be overtly gay is unmanly and shameful. To compensate, many gay men adopt a macho, "straight acting" pose that blocks them from being their full selves, expressing their true feelings and forging real, lasting connections. In Straight Acting, Angelo Pezzote (AskAngelo.com) encourages readers to go beyond limiting ideas of how "real" men should behave, and leave behind out-dated ways of being that create stumbling blocks to deeper intimacy. Drawing on his years of experience as a gay psychotherapist and advice columnist, he offers practical and thoughtful relationship strategies, with tips on subjects that include coming out, dating, how to avoid falling for a player, how to maintain a sizzling, satisfying sex life, navigating open relationships, and much more. Most of all, he delivers crucial insights on the importance of ditching the macho act and learning to be true to yourself. Whether you're single and sick of it, wanting to move closer to your partner, or wondering how to meet someone for the very first time, let Angelo show you how to get real and get him. Put yourself out there to get--and keep--the love you want.




Straight Acting Gay Men


Book Description

The author, drawing on his years of experience as a gay psychotherapist and advice columnist (AskAngelo.com), offers practical and thoughtful relationship strategies, as well as insight into such issues as coming out, dating, avoiding players, and maintaining a satisfying sex life. Original.




Sissyphobia


Book Description

Here is a revealing look into male effeminacy: why some gay men are swishy, why other gay men are more masculine, and why effeminate men arouse anger, disgust, and disdain in both gay and straight men. Sissyphobia explores those negative feelings that are aimed at people termed fairies, faggots, flamers, and queens; men who, as author Tim Bergling puts it, "run more toward what we could term the 'Quentin Crisp school of homosexuality.'"--Publisher description.




Mostly Straight


Book Description

Based on research, the author explores in this publication the personal stories of forty young men to help us understand the biological and psychological factors that led them to become mostly straight and the cultural forces that are loosening the sexual bind that many boys and young men experience.




Over the Cliff


Book Description

"Over the Cliff" is a self-help book for husbands and wives living in straight/gay marriages. Over three million gay men in the United States and millions more around the world are living double lives in marriages to women due to societal pressures or a lack of understanding their homosexuality at the time of marriage. This book has over a dozen interviews with men who have lived through this experience and offer their insights to others. The book is co-authored by Bonnie Kaye, M.Ed., an internationally recognized counseling specialist for straight wives married to gay men and Doug Dittmer, a gay husband peer counselor who has worked with Kaye over the past five years helping numerous gay men in marriages come to terms with their homosexuality so they can move on to more fulfilling lives. About the Authors Bonnie Kaye is an internationally recognized Relationship Counselor/Author in the field of straight/gay marriages. She has provided relationship counseling for over 25 years with more than 70,000 women who have sexually dysfunctional husbands due to homosexuality, bisexuality, transgenderism or sexual addictions. She is considered an authority in this field by other professionals and the media. Kaye has published five books on straight/gay relationships, which have sold thousands of copies. Her website www.Gayhusbands.com has consistently remained in the number one position on Google, Yahoo, and other major search engines since it's launching in 2000. When media contacts want an expert, they come to Bonnie Kaye who has more experience and expertise than any other person in this country. Her official book website is located at www.BonnieKayeBooks.com. Kaye's other books include: "The Gay Husband Checklist for Women Who Wonder; Doomed Grooms: Gay Husbands of Straight Wives; ManReaders: A Woman's Guide to Dysfunctional Men; Straight Wives: Shattered Lives; Bonnie Kaye's Straight Talk;" and "How I Made My Husband Gay: Myths About Straight Wives." With over 30 years experience in business management, Talent Acquisition and Executive Recruitment, Doug Dittmer's career has depended on his ability to coach clients and employees in problem resolution. Eighteen years into his marriage, Doug faced his own crisis and announced that he was gay. In 1981 Doug put his skills to work to fight discrimination against lesbian, gay and bisexual people. Doug began as a Legislative Lobbyist for the Michigan Organization for Human Rights (MOHR), the State's premier gay rights organization. Within a short time he was elected as the group's Education Officer, charged with the responsibility of educating the general public about lesbian and gay issues. Doug went on to be elected President of the organization. Under his leadership, a task force of volunteer litigation attorneys was recruited to overturn Michigan's sodomy statutes. Two years later, in MOHR v. Kelly, MOHR achieved that objective when the Wayne County Circuit Court ruled the statute as unconstitutional. In November 1985, the Detroit City Council recognized his achievements and leadership in the area of human rights by awarding him the Spirit of Detroit Award. Over the years since, Doug has reached out to other gay men coming to terms with their sexuality in mid-life, acting as peer counselor and coach.




Is My Husband Gay, Straight, or Bi?


Book Description

Jennifer can’t believe it. Just married and pregnant, she discovers that her husband has been meeting Brad for sex. When confronted, Tom doesn’t deny it, but he insists it’s just “a thing” and he isn’t gay. Elsewhere, John’s wife, Karen, discovers that her husband likes to watch gay porn. John doesn’t understand his wife’s reaction. Why does she care what he watches if he’s not unfaithful? In couple’s therapy, Karen and Jennifer raise the same questions: Does this mean my husband is gay? Can my marriage survive? These and other stories illustrate the difficulties inherent when a wife or girlfriend finds out her man has had or wants to have sexual contact with other men. But many times, the man is not gay or even bisexual. Of course, some men with gay sexual interests are gay men in a process of self-discovery; they are “coming out.” These desires may only reflect a different side of a man’s sexuality or some response to childhood trauma or experiences they have not fully processed. Here Joe Kort and Alexander P. Morgan make the distinction between gay men and “straight men with gay interests” clearer to women who want to know how they can overcome these revelations. The authors explain the many reasons why straight men may be drawn to gay sex; how to tell whether a man is gay, straight, or bisexual; and what the various options are for these couples, who can often go on to have very fulfilling marriages. Is My Husband Gay, Straight or Bi? is intended to help couples understand how male sexuality can express itself in ways that may be difficult to understand. Many marriages have been hurriedly terminated when couples (and their therapists) have lacked the information they needed to understand their current situations. This book provides the clarity, describes the choices, and (in many cases) offers hope for relationships and marriages that have been brushed off as doomed.




Still Acting Gay


Book Description

Still Acting Gay is a revision and expansion of Clum's celebrated book, Acting Gay. The book focuses on the relationship between American and British dramas written by and about gay men and the changing gay culture those plays reflect, from the carefully enforced closet to liberation politics to AIDS to the qualified security of the present. Still Acting Gay chronicles the transition of the gay man as subject for sensational melodrama to creator of many of the most powerful and celebrated plays of the late 20th century.




People in Trouble


Book Description

'A book of resistance and love, as urgently necessary now as it was thirty years ago' Olivia Laing First published in 1990, discover this blistering novel about a love triangle in New York during the AIDS crisis. The perfect novel to read after bingeing It's A Sin. It was the beginning of the end of the world but not everyone noticed right away. It is the late 1980s. Kate, an ambitious artist, lives in Manhattan with her husband Peter. She's having an affair with Molly, a younger lesbian who works part-time in a movie theater. At one of many funerals during an unbearably hot summer, Molly becomes involved with a guerrilla activist group fighting for people with AIDS. But Kate is more cautious, and Peter is bewildered by the changes he's seeing in his city and, most crucially, in his wife. Soon the trio learn how tragedy warps even the closest relationships, and that anger - and its absence - can make the difference between life and death. 'Strong, nervy and challenging' New York Times




Camp


Book Description

Set in a summer camp, this sweet and sharp screwball comedy set in a summer camp for queer teens examines the nature of toxic masculinity and self-acceptance. Sixteen-year-old Randy Kapplehoff loves spending the summer at Camp Outland, a camp for queer teens. It's where he met his best friends. It's where he takes to the stage in the big musical. And it's where he fell for Hudson Aaronson-Lim—who's only into straight-acting guys and barely knows not-at-all-straight-acting Randy even exists. This year, however, it's going to be different. Randy has reinvented himself as 'Del'—buff, masculine, and on the market. Even if it means giving up show tunes, nail polish, and his unicorn bedsheets, he's determined to get Hudson to fall for him. But as he and Hudson grow closer, Randy has to ask himself: How much is he willing to change for love? And is it really love anyway, if Hudson doesn't know who he truly is?