Suzy, Led Zeppelin, and Me


Book Description

New novel from the cult author of 'The Good Faires of New York' and 'Milk, Sulphate and Alby Starvation'. Glasgow, 1972: All the coolest kids, rockstar angels and mystical creatures in town are queuing up to see the greatest rock band in the world. Meanwhile over-imaginative Martin and Greg compete for the attention of Suzy, who dates the hippest guy in school. With Led Zeppelin on their way, anything can happen. 'Brixton's answer to Kurt Vonnegut' - The Guardian 'One of the most valuable presences on the British literary scene' - Mail on Sunday




Milk, Sulphate, and Alby Starvation


Book Description

There's a megalomaniac professor digging a hole outside his flat. His small stake in the amphetamine market in Brixton is being threatened by a mysterious Chinese man. And the Milk Marketing Board has taken out a contract on his life. Welcome to the bizarre, obsessive world of Alby Starvation. Albys doctor refuses to believe he's allergic to just about everything (which he is), especially milk. But when Alby soon discovers that his ongoing ailments are directly linked to the consumption of said product, he gives it up and is cured. Only thing is, he goes on to suggest this remedy to a number of other people suffering from milk allergies. In Millar's surreal backyard, the Milk Marketing Board sees sales slump to an all time low. So there's only one thing left to do: put out a contract on Alby Starvation. Now Alby must save both his life and his precious comic collection. In Martin Millar's surreal tale of the urban counter culture a world full of shoplifting, death threats, paranoia, and video game arcades Albys frantic struggle to avoid being shot falls somewhere between Irvine Welsh and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.




Led Zeppelin and Philosophy


Book Description

Led Zeppelin, who bestrode the world of rock like a colossus, have continually grown in popularity and influence since their official winding up in 1980. They exasperated critics and eluded classification, synthesizing blues, rock, folk, rockabilly, funk, classical, country, Indian, and Arabic techniques. They performed the alchemical trick of transmuting base led into gold—and platinum—and diamond. They did what they would, finding wisdom through personal excess and artistic self-discipline. “Not a coda to Zeppelin’s legacy, but a blast of metaphysical graffiti as relevant today as the first time we heard the opening chords of ‘Stairway to Heaven’. From Kant to ‘Kashmir’, from Freud to ‘Fool in the Rain’, Calef and company explore Zeppelin’s music in an introspective, suggestive manner worthy of both a blistering Page solo and a bawdy Bonham stomp.” —BRANDON W. FORBES, co-editor of Radiohead and Philosophy “Led Zeppelin’s albums, personalities, live performances, art work, myths, influences, and more, all come under the microscope. Compelling insights and observations add more depth to a subject that continues to thrill and inspire. Each chapter is driven by an unquenchable thirst for Zeppelin knowledge and pulls the reader deeper into the world of Led Zeppelin . . .” —DAVE LEWIS, editor, Tight But Loose




The Good Fairies Of New York


Book Description

'I owned it for five years before reading it, then lent my copy to someone I thought should read it, and never got it back. Do not make either of my mistakes. Read it now, and then make your friends buy their own copies. You'll thank me one day' Neil Gaiman Morag and Heather, two eighteen-inch fairies with swords, green kilts and badly dyed hair fly through the window of the worst violinist in New York, an overweight and antisocial type named Dinnie, and vomit on his carpet. Who they are, how they came to New York and what this has to do with the lovely Kerry - who lives across the street, and has Crohn's Disease, and is making a flower alphabet - and what this has to do with the other fairies (of all nationalities) of New York, not to mention the poor repressed fairies of Britain, is the subject of this book. It has a war in it, and a most unusual production of Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream and Johnny Thunders' New York Dolls guitar solos. What more could anyone desire from a book? Why do readers love The Good Fairies of New York? 'Pure literary gold' 'I can't remember the last time a book gave me as many belly laughs as this one did' 'Hilarious' 'A fairy tale tale for the new kids on the block : irreverent, subversive, sexually liberated, rich in pop culture references' 'Page-turning . . . intelligent, but never overdone' 'Off-beat and quirky, but it's also a tale with a beating pulse and moral warmth. Martin Millar is an incredible addition to the paranormal scene - he dirties the genre, roughs it up and screams a story that rings in your ears long after the last page'




Goddess of Buttercups & Daisies


Book Description

Aristophanes is inconsolable—his rival playwrights are hogging all the local attention, a pesky young wannabe poet won’t leave him alone, his actors can’t remember their lines, and his own festival sponsor seems to be conspiring against him, withholding direly needed funds for set design and, most importantly, giant phallus props. O woe, how can his latest comedy convince Athenian citizens to vote down another ten years of war against Sparta if they’re too busy scoffing at the diminutive phalluses? And why does everyone in the city-state seem to be losing their minds? Wallowing in one inconvenience after another, Aristophanes is unaware that the Spartan and Athenian generals have unleashed Laet, the spirit of foolishness and bad decisions, to inspire chaos and war-mongering in Athens. To counteract Laet’s influence, Athena sends Bremusa, an Amazon warrior, and Metris, an endearingly airheaded nymph (their first choice was her mother Metricia, but she grew tired of all the fighting and changed back into a river). Dashing between fantastical scenes of moody and meddlesome gods, ever-applicable political debates in the senate, backstage scrambling for the play, and glimpses of life in Ancient Greece, Martin Millar delivers another witty and comical romp for readers of all ages.




Kink Me Honey


Book Description

Kink Me Honey: The earnest, erotic, dominant, submissive, cheerful, depressed, humorous and occasionally clumsy endeavours of Ark, Gina, Mig, Mistress Tardy, Glam Tilly and an assortment of masters, mistresses, doms, subs and slaves, in the world of kink centred around Sex Orbit, London's most prominent fetish organisation.




Lux the Poet


Book Description

There is something about Lux. He's a thief and a liar; he is selfish and self-absorbed and hopelessly vain. But while he looks like Lana Turner and romances like a true Casanova, Lux is actually more like a bumbling, oblivious Mary Tyler Moore. Amid shouting mobs, police shields, and the hurled bricks of the 80s Brixton riots, Lux is searching for Pearl the love of his life. Her home has been burned down by a stray petrol bomb, and she's searching for sanctuary along with her friend Nicky. Nicky is traumatized after having killed her computer her best friend and is herself being followed by Happy Science PLC. It is their plan to breed a superior next generation by implanting the sperm of genius men inside beautiful women. She knows too much about the plan. Lux is helped in his quest by Kalia, a castaway of Heaven attempting to get back in Gods good graces by performing one million good deeds over countless lifetimes. There's also a thrash metal band, a riot-party, past lives, and KY. Lots of KY.




Lux the Poet


Book Description

There is something about Lux. He’s a thief and a liar; he is selfish and self-absorbed and hopelessly vain. But while he looks like Lana Turner and romances like a true Casanova, Lux is actually more like a bumbling, oblivious Mary Tyler Moore. Amid shouting mobs, police shields, and the hurled bricks of the ’80s Brixton riots, Lux is searching for Pearl—the love of his life. Her home has been burned down by a stray petrol bomb, and she’s searching for sanctuary along with her friend Nicky. Nicky is traumatized after having killed her computer—her best friend—and is herself being followed by Happy Science PLC. It is their plan to breed a superior next generation by implanting the sperm of genius men inside beautiful women. She knows too much about the plan. Lux is helped in his quest by Kalia, a castaway of Heaven attempting to get back in God’s good graces by performing one million good deeds over countless lifetimes. There’s also a thrash metal band, a riot-party, past lives, and KY. Lots of KY.




Ruby and the Stone Age Diet


Book Description

Though the narrator's life is peppered with myth, demons, werewolves, god and goddesses, the only thing stronger and more sustaining is his friendship with Ruby. "From now on," Ruby says to her friend, the narrator, "We’re going on the Stone Age diet. It means we only eat the sort of healthy things our ancestors would have eaten. Raw grains and fruits and stuff like that. That’s what our bodies are made for." An admirable plan, but Ruby never eats, and the narrator’s attention span doesn’t lend itself to routine. He’s too busy pining for his ex-girlfriend Cis, who broke up with him and left him with self-pity and a plant: an Aphrodite Cactus that, when it flowers, is supposed to seal the love of the giver to the receiver, according to Ruby. Ruby, who never wears any shoes (even in the dead of winter). Though lovelorn and lonely, the narrator’s life is rich with myth, demons, werewolves, gods and goddesses; everything is imbued with a spirit. There’s Helena, goddess of electric guitar players; Ascanazl, an ancient and powerful Inca spirit who looks after lonely people; Shumash the sun god; the war and sexuality goddess Astarte; the muse Clio. In fact the only thing stronger and more sustaining than the narrator’s fantasy life is his friendship with Ruby—the kind of friendship a body is made for.




Dreams of Sex and Stage Diving


Book Description

Elfish’s friends live hand to mouth in a bleak section of London, squatting, seeing local bands, getting high, and feeling bitter over lost ambitions. Except Elfish, who pursues exactly what she wants with demonic single-mindedness. Elfish rarely eats, never washes, and is devoted to Queen Mab — both the Shakespearian fairy, “deliverer of dreams,” and her thrash metal band, formed with her attractive but dimwitted lover, Mo. When Mo jilts her and calls his new band Queen Mab, Elfish is determined to keep the name for her own band and sets about getting revenge. To stop Mo, Elfish is obliged to steal, cheat, and lie to everyone around her. Happily, Elfish is a compulsive liar, and quite fond of cheating and stealing. On the night Mo’s band is to play, he and his friends laugh cruelly around her. The people she has deceived turn on her viciously. It is up to Elfish whether to give up hope or to rally, proving to all the power of her will. A fearless stage diver and shameless purveyor of bad sex, Elfish stands alone. Surrounded by people who have given up hope, only she will not put down her guitar. Only she refuses to stop dreaming.