The Big Fat South African Joke Book


Book Description

Koos is sitting in a bar. Each time he orders a drink he takes out his wallet, removes a photograph and stares at it. ‘Who’s the photo of?’ asks the barman, serving Koos his eighth Klippies and Coke. ‘My wife. When she starts to look pretty I’ll know I’ve had enough.’ What’s the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead rugby referee in the road? There are skid marks in front of the dog. WARNING: Not for the faint-hearted or Mother Grundys of this world! Politically incorrect, irreverent and laugh-out-loud funny, The Big Fat South African Joke Book covers a range of topics close to every South African’s heart: from Patricia Lewis to Robert Mugabe; from rugby referees to Kamp Staaldraad; from picking up chicks to marriage; from infidelity to divorce; from Little Bongani to Little Koos and Little Gertruide; from school days to Varsity; and from the mouth of babes to the Pearly Gates of Heaven. These and many other jokes will tickle your funny bone and keep you chuckling for hours.




The Big, Fat South African Kiddies' Joke Book


Book Description

The book that will tickle the funny bone of all South African children, both young and old. The Big, Fat South African Kiddies’ Joke Book contains jokes of all shapes and sizes, from knock-knock jokes to one-liners and old-time classics. There are short jokes, and longer jokes, and questions and silly answers. There are animals that can talk, children who outfox grown-ups, jokes about teachers and learners, sport and computers, the precious (and hilarious) things children say, and much, much more. The Big, Fat South African Kiddies’ Joke Book is guaranteed to put a big smile on every child’s dial, whether they are seven or seventy!




The Wallet Allocation Rule


Book Description

Customer Loyalty Isn't Enough—Grow Your Share of Wallet The Wallet Allocation Rule is a revolutionary, definitive guide for winning the battle for share of customers' hearts, minds, and wallets. Backed by rock-solid science published in the Harvard Business Review and MIT Sloan Management Review, this landmark book introduces a new and rigorously tested approach—the Wallet Allocation Rule—that is proven to link to the most important measure of customer loyalty: share of wallet. Companies currently spend billions of dollars each year measuring and managing metrics like customer satisfaction and Net Promoter Score (NPS) to improve customer loyalty. These metrics, however, have almost no correlation to share of wallet. As a result, the returns on investments designed to improve the customer experience are frequently near zero, even negative. With The Wallet Allocation Rule, managers finally have the missing link to business growth within their grasp—the ability to link their existing metrics to the share of spending that customers allocate to their brands. Learn why improving satisfaction (or NPS) does not improve share. Apply the Wallet Allocation Rule to discover what really drives customer spending. Uncover new metrics that really matter to achieve growth. By applying the Wallet Allocation Rule, managers get real insight into the money they currently get from their customers, the money available to be earned by them, and what it takes to get it. The Wallet Allocation Rule provides managers with a blueprint for sustainable long-term growth.










The Heinemann Book of South African Short Stories


Book Description

All by writers who spent their formative years in South Africa, this diverse range of short stories spans from the end of World War II when the National Party was on the upsurge, to the early 1990s when the legal framework of apartheid was abolished, the ANC was legalized and Mandela was released.




The Short Story in South Africa


Book Description

This book considers the key critical interventions on short story writing in South Africa written in English since the year 2000. The short story genre, whilst often marginalised in national literary canons, has been central to the trajectory of literary history in South Africa. In recent years, the short story has undergone a significant renaissance, with new collections and young writers making a significant impact on the contemporary literary scene, and subgenres such as speculative fiction, erotic fiction, flash fiction and queer fiction expanding rapidly in popularity. This book examines the role of the short story genre in reflecting or championing new developments in South African writing and the ways in which traditional boundaries and definitions of the short story in South Africa have been reimagined in the present. Drawing together a range of critical interventions, including scholarly articles, interviews and personal reflective pieces, the volume traces some of the aesthetic and thematic continuities and discontinuities in the genre and sheds new light on questions of literary form. Finally, the book considers the place of the short story in twenty-first century writing and interrogates the ways in which the short story form may contribute to, or recast ideas of, the post-apartheid or post-transitional. The perfect guide to contemporary short story writing in South Africa, this book will be essential reading for researchers of African literature.




South African national bibliography


Book Description

Classified list with author and title index.




Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot and Other Observations


Book Description

Move over P.J. O'Rourke! From Al Franken, America's premier liberal satirist, comes a hilarious homage to the wonderful, awful, and always absurd American political process that skewers a whole new crop of presidential hopefuls--just in time for the 1996 presidential election. "(Franken is) responsible in part for some of the most brilliant political satire of our time".--John Podhoretz, New York Post.




Kaapse bibliotekaris


Book Description

Issues for Nov. 1957- include section: Accessions. Aanwinste, Sept. 1957-