The Hilarious Dead Guy's Last Chance Undies


Book Description

Get ready to buckle up for a wild ride of thrills, laughs, and a seriously flashy undergarment! Enter the world of Polonia Appleseed, a spunky seven-year-old who witnesses her father’s demise, complete with a puzzling clue—a pair of men’s undies adorned with sparkly hearts. Fast forward to Polonia’s coming of age, where, after the unfortunately explosive colonoscopy end of her Uncle George, she’s surrounded by relatives, all of them prime suspects in her father’s killing. And all of Polonia’s relatives know, she is not ordinary. Following in her father’s footsteps, Polonia concocts a daring scheme to expose the killer by swiping millions right out from everyone’s noses! Brace yourself for a whirlwind adventure as Polonia navigates a treacherous path of financial family subterfuge, with heart-pounding suspense, plot twists that’ll leave you gasping, and enough humor to keep your sides splitting. Will Polonia outwit the killer and serve up a platter of justice? Or will she find herself entangled in a sticky web of deceit and danger? Join Polonia on her quest for truth and redemption, where secrets unravel, alliances teeter on the edge, and bombshell revelations lie just beneath the surface. Figure out who the killer is before Polonia, you know the clue! Bonus chapters from some of the author’s other books are included.




The Hilarious Dead Guy's Last Chance Undies


Book Description

EXPLOSIVE COLONOSCOPY ANGST! Seven-year-old Polonia Appleseed cowered in terror the night her Daddy died and killer unknown escaped, a pair of sparkly-hearted men's underwear the only clue. But Polonia's grown up now, and with all the suspects gathering after her Uncle George's unfortunately fatal buttocalypse, Polonia's decided to let one rip of her own: lure the killer out of hiding by doing exactly what her Daddy did, scam millions right under everyone's noses! She is kinda hoping for a better result though.




Azalea & Syzygy


Book Description

Embark on an enthralling journey through the hallowed chambers of an ancient sisterhood, where nuns harness divine abilities to purge wickedness from souls. Brace yourself for an extraordinary quest to rescue the world, spearheaded by an unlikely duo: a feisty centenarian and an endearingly naive teenager. Equipped with their trusty Super-Soakers, these mismatched champions must battle an encroaching storm of supernatural vengeance that threatens humanity’s very existence. Prepare for a gripping whirlwind adventure, as ancient forces clash with the unwavering spirit of Azalea & Syzygy, two unsuspecting heroes in a tale teeming with riotous laughter, heart-stopping suspense, against-all-odds camaraderie, and an irresistible touch of pandemonium! Bonus chapters from some of the author’s other books are included.




Haunting the Rainbow


Book Description

It killed a hundred million people. The most lethal event ever to hit humanity ravaged the world in 1918. But one victim was actually murdered and a century later newly graduated (i.e. unemployed) Library Science Minor Eileen Saffron scrambles to unmask the shocking truth, rousing a deadly family ghost? KEYWORDS: historical mystery, historical fiction, detective, humorous, female protagonist, cozy mystery, sleuth, mystery, female detective




The Liar Charms


Book Description

Buckle up for an exhilarating journey with Remy, the unsuspecting victim of a mind-boggling kidnapping! Join her as she encounters Isaiah Grommet, a determined tycoon with mysterious motives. What sets Remy apart? She’s no ordinary gal—she’s a Liar Charm, wielding a mind-blowing ability that makes her a hot commodity in Isaiah’s empire. Brace yourself, because Remy is about to become a player in this thrilling game. But hey, Remy is far from your damsel in distress. Remy’s a hipster with an unstoppable spirit and a knack for offbeat ideas. When faced with forced servitude, she won’t crumble under pressure, she’ll serve up a hilarious blend of creativity and wit that’ll leave everyone exhausted and amazed. Prepare to dive headfirst into Remy’s world, where she fearlessly carves her own path and defies the odds. Get ready to be fully invested in cheering for Remy’s unconventional triumph like it’s a matter of life and death! Because… it is. Bonus chapters from some of the author’s other novels are included.




Creepy Pair of Underwear!


Book Description

From the celebrated team behind Creepy Carrots!, Aaron Reynolds and Caldecott Honor winner Peter Brown, comes a hilarious (and just a little creepy) story of a brave rabbit and a very weird pair of underwear. Jasper Rabbit is NOT a little bunny anymore. He’s not afraid of the dark, and he’s definitely not afraid of something as silly as underwear. But when the lights go out, suddenly his new big rabbit underwear glows in the dark. A ghoulish, greenish glow. If Jasper didn’t know any better he’d say his undies were a little, well, creepy. Jasper’s not scared obviously, he’s just done with creepy underwear. But after trying everything to get rid of them, they keep coming back!




The Dead Hour


Book Description

The most praised thriller writer to burst onto the scene in years returns with a brilliant story of suicide, murder, violence, and greed. Responding to a late night-call, Paddy Meehan arrives at an elegant villa, where a calm blonde with blood running from her mouth answers the door. She has already convinced the police to leave and soon Paddy realizes how: she slips 50 bucks into Paddy's hands and begs her to keep the incident, whatever it is, out of the press. The next morning Paddy sees the lead news story: The blonde woman has been murdered, and far from the spoiled trophy wife Paddy assumed her to be, the victim turns out to be a prosecution lawyer with a social conscience. Bewildered why the woman didn't take the chance to leave the house when she could, Paddy begins to make connections no one else has seen. When she witnesses the body of a suicide victim being pulled from the river shortly afterward, Paddy suspects links between the two deaths and follows her idea to its shocking -- and deadly -- conclusion.




Dada Underwear


Book Description

This Novel is written in a "dada" format, the randomly placed words have developed their own meanings and ideas apart from the ones imbued by the author, thus each reader can experience a totally different story line based on their own perception of what the words mean to them as individual readers. No effort has been made to "normalize" this dada proses.100%% PURE DADAIf you are a fan of the dada art movement or of Tristan Tzara then your library should have this book.The author of this book is a simple American housewife who only wishes to explore the world of art in its many and varied forms.




Small Medium at Large


Book Description

Lilah can hear ghosts, and boy are they annoying! After she's hit by lightning at a wedding, twelve-year-old Lilah Bloom develops a new talent: she can hear dead people. That's right, she's now a medium--a person who talks to hosts! Among them, there's her overopinionated Bubby Dora; an old lady fashion designer; and a kid who is pure mischief and threatens to ruin everything. The ghosts are more annoying than frightening, especially when Lilah has one big fear on her mind: talking to-and possibly going to the seventh-grade dance with-her crush, Andrew Finkel. Lilah only ever wanted to be a regular seventh-grader, maybe a seventh-grader with a date for the dance, but with meddling ghosts getting in the way, her life is now filled with drama of the spirit variety. What's a young medium to do? Keywords: middle grade, funny, humorous, tween, ghosts, dating, crush, friendship, sydney taylor, awards, red maple, jewish books, small medium at large, canadian, series




Counting by 7s


Book Description

A New York Times Bestseller In the tradition of Out of My Mind, Wonder, and Mockingbird, this is an intensely moving middle grade novel about being an outsider, coping with loss, and discovering the true meaning of family. Willow Chance is a twelve-year-old genius, obsessed with nature and diagnosing medical conditions, who finds it comforting to count by 7s. It has never been easy for her to connect with anyone other than her adoptive parents, but that hasn’t kept her from leading a quietly happy life . . . until now. Suddenly Willow’s world is tragically changed when her parents both die in a car crash, leaving her alone in a baffling world. The triumph of this book is that it is not a tragedy. This extraordinarily odd, but extraordinarily endearing, girl manages to push through her grief. Her journey to find a fascinatingly diverse and fully believable surrogate family is a joy and a revelation to read. * “Willow's story is one of renewal, and her journey of rebuilding the ties that unite people as a family will stay in readers' hearts long after the last page.”—School Library Journal starred review * “A graceful, meaningful tale featuring a cast of charming, well-rounded characters who learn sweet—but never cloying—lessons about resourcefulness, community, and true resilience in the face of loss.”—Booklist starred review * “What sets this novel apart from the average orphan-finds-a-home book is its lack of sentimentality, its truly multicultural cast (Willow describes herself as a “person of color”; Mai and Quang-ha are of mixed Vietnamese, African American, and Mexican ancestry), and its tone. . . . Poignant.”—The Horn Book starred review "In achingly beautiful prose, Holly Goldberg Sloan has written a delightful tale of transformation that’s a celebration of life in all its wondrous, hilarious and confounding glory. Counting by 7s is a triumph."—Maria Semple, author of Where’d You Go, Bernadette