The Quotable Douchebag


Book Description

Did he really just say that?!? Douchebags have a gift for speaking the unspeakable. Vain, arrogant, brash, and clueless, they’re the worst the male species has to offer—and now their most outlandish statements have been compiled into a single volume. The Quotable Douchebag features dozens of boneheaded and tasteless remarks from actors, musicians, athletes, and politicians, including: David Hasselhoff: “There are many dying children out there whose last wish is to meet me.” Gene Simmons: “[I] don’t believe there’s any difference between a monogamous and a polygamous relationship. Those are all just big words, like gymnasium.” Sean Hannity: “I’ll tell you who should be tortured and killed at Guantanamo: every filthy Democrat in the U.S. Congress.” And many, many more.




The Quotable Douchebag


Book Description

Did he really just say that?!? Douchebags have a gift for speaking the unspeakable. Vain, arrogant, brash, and clueless, they’re the worst the male species has to offer—and now their most outlandish statements have been compiled into a single volume. The Quotable Douchebag features dozens of boneheaded and tasteless remarks from actors, musicians, athletes, and politicians, including: David Hasselhoff: “There are many dying children out there whose last wish is to meet me.” Gene Simmons: “[I] don’t believe there’s any difference between a monogamous and a polygamous relationship. Those are all just big words, like gymnasium.” Sean Hannity: “I’ll tell you who should be tortured and killed at Guantanamo: every filthy Democrat in the U.S. Congress.” And many, many more.




Microcrafts


Book Description

It is a small world, after all! Here are step-by-step instructions for making tiny teddy bears, little ladybugs, petite porcupines, itsy-bitsy bikinis, and much, much more! Microcrafts shows crafters how to create dozens of miniature treasures, each no larger than a spool of thread. No previous crafting experience or pricey materials are necessary—just a love of all things small!




Assholeology


Book Description

Getting one's way requires the perpetrator to be cocky yet quietly confident, snide as well as sincere, sneaky while abrupt. Better men than most have failed miserably. This guide is the first to walk readers through the tricks of the trade and the numerous benefits the attitude reaps.




Casino Confidential


Book Description

In Casino Confidential, a veteran pit boss and dealer (who must remain anonymous) takes readers behind the scenes to show where casinos are most vulnerable—and which bets are simply a waste of money. Through chapters on blackjack, Texas hold ’em, roulette, craps, baccarat, slot machines, and more, readers will learn: • Basic strategy for the most popular casino games • Five keys to successful gambling • Tips for identifying and maintaining positive streaks • Advice on money and bankroll management . . . and much more. Along the way, Anonymous shares examples and anecdotes gleaned from a career working as a pit boss and keeping high rollers under his thumb. You’ve been told again and again that the odds are stacked against players—but that doesn’t stop thousands of gamblers from winning big every day. Discover what they all have in common—and what the house doesn’t want you to know—in Casino Confidential.




The Quotable A**hole


Book Description

Whoever said, "sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you" never met an a**hole. Here, you'll find more than 1,200 of the most biting quotes, comments, and comebacks ever uttered, including: "I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would be an affront to your intelligence." --George Bernard Shaw "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein "If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can sure make something out of you." --Muhammed Ali You won't just find quotes from typical a**holes like Winston Churchill, Joseph Stalin, and Mark Twain, either. You'll also see what happens when practically perfect folks like Walt Disney, Mahatma Ghandi, and Audrey Hepburn lose their cool. So embrace your dark side and get ready to enjoy every over-confident, over-blown, over-the-top a**hole comment you'll ever need.




Summer Sons


Book Description

Lee Mandelo's debut Summer Sons is a sweltering, queer Southern Gothic that crosses Appalachian street racing with academic intrigue, all haunted by a hungry ghost. Andrew and Eddie did everything together, best friends bonded more deeply than brothers, until Eddie left Andrew behind to start his graduate program at Vanderbilt. Six months later, only days before Andrew was to join him in Nashville, Eddie dies of an apparent suicide. He leaves Andrew a horrible inheritance: a roommate he doesn’t know, friends he never asked for, and a gruesome phantom that hungers for him. As Andrew searches for the truth of Eddie’s death, he uncovers the lies and secrets left behind by the person he trusted most, discovering a family history soaked in blood and death. Whirling between the backstabbing academic world where Eddie spent his days and the circle of hot boys, fast cars, and hard drugs that ruled Eddie’s nights, the walls Andrew has built against the world begin to crumble. And there is something awful lurking, waiting for those walls to fall. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.




How Hard Can It Be?


Book Description

A woman approaching fifty must rejoin the workforce as she juggles motherhood and her husband’s midlife crisis in this “brilliant, funny, and tender” novel (Booklist, starred review). Kate Reddy had it all: a nice home, two adorable kids, a good husband. Then her kids became teenagers (read: monsters). Richard, her husband, quit his job, taking up bicycling and therapeutic counseling: drinking green potions, dressing head to toe in Lycra, and spending his time—and their money—on his own therapy. Since Richard no longer sees a regular income as part of the path to enlightenment, it’s left to Kate to go back to work. Companies aren’t necessarily keen on hiring forty-nine-year-old mothers, so Kate does what she must: knocks a few years off her age, hires a trainer, joins a Women Returners group, and prepares a new resume that has a shot at a literary prize for experimental fiction. When Kate manages to secure a job at the very hedge fund she founded, she finds herself in an impossible juggling act: proving herself (again) at work, dealing with teen drama, and trying to look after increasingly frail parents as the clock keeps ticking toward her fiftieth birthday. Then, of course, an old flame shows up out of the blue, and Kate finds herself facing off with everyone from Russian mobsters to a literal stallion. Surely it will all work out in the end. After all, how hard can it be?




When You Get the Chance


Book Description

Follow cousins on a road trip to Pride as they dive into family secrets and friendships in this contemporary novel—perfect for fans of David Levithan and Becky Albertalli. As kids, Mark and his cousin Talia spent many happy summers together at the family cottage in Ontario, but a fight between their parents put an end to the annual event. Living on opposite coasts—Mark in Halifax and Talia in Victoria—they haven't seen each other in years. When their grandfather dies unexpectedly, Mark and Talia find themselves reunited at the cottage once again, cleaning it out while the family decides what to do with it. Mark and Talia are both queer, but they soon realize that's about all they have in common, other than the fact that they'd both prefer to be in Toronto. Talia is desperate to see her high school sweetheart Erin, who's barely been in touch since leaving to spend the summer working at a coffee shop in the Gay Village. Mark, on the other hand, is just looking for some fun, and Toronto Pride seems like the perfect place to find it. When a series of complications throws everything up in the air, Mark and Talia—with Mark's little sister Paige in tow—decide to hit the road for Toronto. With a bit of luck, and some help from a series of unexpected new friends, they might just make it to the big city and find what they're looking for. That is, if they can figure out how to start seeing things through each other's eyes.




Come Away with Me


Book Description

Being confronted on the beach by a sexy stranger wasn't part of Natalie Conner's plans for a peaceful morning taking photos. And why on earth would he think she's taking pictures of him, anyway? Who is he? One thing's for sure, he's hot, and incredibly romantic, feeding Natalie's wounded soul. Luke Williams just wants the world to give him a break, so seeing yet another camera aimed at his face has him ready to pounce on the beauty behind the lens. When he finds out she has no idea who he is, he's intrigued and more than a little tempted by her. Natalie has a body made for sex, a sassy mouth and Luke can't get enough of her, but he's not ready to tell her who he really his. Natalie is a no nonsense girl who doesn't do well with lies and secrets. What will happen to this new relationship when she discovers what Luke's hiding?