The Dumbest Things Ever Said


Book Description

A collection of stupid utterances, mostly unintentional--although not always--from politics, show business, sports, and anywhere else people can put their feet in their mouths. Based on recorded history, it's safe to say that dumb remarks have been with us since the invention of writing. Young or old, rich or poor, famous or unknown, people of all generations and cultures have seized the opportunity to say something dumb - stupidity has always been an equal opportunity employer. In celebration of such mental lapses and pure idiocy, here is a collection of stupid utterances, unintentional and otherwise, from the worlds of politics, radio, television, newspapers, show business, sports, and literature - and everywhere else people can - and have - put their feet in their mouths.




The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said


Book Description

A connoisseur's compendium of Freudian slips, spoonerisms, double-talk, and utter bosh from famous and infamous figures past and present -- a complete course in anti-eloquence by the foot-in-mouth champions of all time.




The Smartest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded


Book Description

The Smartest Things Ever Said is a compendium of human wisdom culled from the world’s most celebrated—and sometimes anonymous—minds. From Confucius and Shakespeare to Maya Angelou and Woody Allen, and from Winston Churchill and Thomas Edison to Jeff Bezos and Jane Fonda, it is quite simply the best collection of the smartest quotes ever.




Sh*t Politicians Say


Book Description

From the moment a Founding Father first asked for a vote, politicians have been saying dumb stuff. From George Washington to George Bush (both of them!) right on to present-day pundits like Donald Trump, Sarah Palin, and Hillary Clinton, political leaders can always be counted on to say funny, exasperating, and nonsensical things, often unintentionally. In Sh*t Politicians Say, Jesse Ventura shares the most entertaining and disturbing “thoughts” from his political brethren, including these winners: “The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make U.S. manufacturing non-competitive.” —Donald Trump “I am not worried about the deficit. It is big enough to take care of itself.” —Ronald Reagan “I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman.” —Arnold Schwarzenegger “I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.” —Dan Quayle “A zebra does not change its spots.” —Al Gore “People have got to know whether or not their president is a crook. Well, I’m not a crook. I’ve earned everything I’ve got.” —Richard Nixon “Death has a tendency to encourage a depressing view of war.” —former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld “I’ll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office.” —George W. Bush From bigoted statements to outright lies . . . flip-flopping to just TMI, Sh*t Politicians Say will provide readers with a welcome respite from the presidential campaigns.




7 Dumb Things We All Say


Book Description

Nobody wants to say dumb things. But we all do. The first step towards reducing the number of dumb things you say is to know what the dumb things are. Based on thirty years of research with millions and millions of conversations, this book contains the secrets of overcoming these blunders: Using Bad Bookends Starting with Wrong First Words Not Choosing Your Words Well Poor Questions and Bad Listening Focus-on-Me Attitude Wrong Tone Not Diffusing Difficult Drama 7 Dumb Things We All Say is quick and enjoyable reading. Action strategies are clearly outlined and provide a road map to success. If you are serious about communicating well--and like a spot of humor along the way--then this is the book for you.




The Most Low-down, Lousiest, Loathsome Things Ever Said


Book Description

A nasty insult (is there any other kind?) can be offensive and infuriating, but we’ve all had those moments when we’ve employed one or just wished we had come up with the perfect nasty thing to say. Even better, having the perfect comeback to one of these rude remarks brings us all the personal satisfaction in the world. The Nastiest Things Ever Said gathers together the very sharpest of these barbs from a wide variety of sources with some of the wickedest put-downs from the literary, political, and entertainment worlds, and everywhere else people say nasty things to each other.




Dim Wit


Book Description

-"Tom [Cruise] has--we all have--the right to practice how we feel...don't judge someone until they have tossed your salad." --John Travolta -"I love Africa in general--South Africa and West Africa, they are both great countries." --Paris Hilton -"Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream." --George W. Bush -"My game is like the Pythagorean theorem: No one has an answer." --Shaquille O'Neal -"It's really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people." --Axl Rose From Muhammad Ali to Frank Zappa, everyone has said something idiotic at some point. Dim Wit presents the most hilarious verbal mishaps ever uttered by famous figures. Perfect for e-mailing to friends and family or giving yourself a laugh before bed, these adventures in Blunderland define "jaw-droppingly stupid."




Stupid Movie Lines


Book Description

The creme de la crud of screen history "War! War! That's all you think of, Dick Plantagenet! You burner! You pillager!" --Virginia Mayo as Lady Edith to George Sanders in King Richard and the Crusaders (1954) "Visits? That would indicate visitors." --Army captain learning of alien visits in Plan 9 from Outer Space (1959) "When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people." --Hero to heroine in The Slime People (1962) "Suck the coffin mushroom now." --The Ultimate Vampire (1991) "This is bad." --Leonardo DiCaprio as the you-know-what hits the you-know-what in Titanic (1997)




The Dumbest Generation


Book Description

This shocking, surprisingly entertaining romp into the intellectual nether regions of today's underthirty set reveals the disturbing and, ultimately, incontrovertible truth: cyberculture is turning us into a society of know-nothings. The Dumbest Generation is a dire report on the intellectual life of young adults and a timely warning of its impact on American democracy and culture. For decades, concern has been brewing about the dumbed-down popular culture available to young people and the impact it has on their futures. But at the dawn of the digital age, many thought they saw an answer: the internet, email, blogs, and interactive and hyper-realistic video games promised to yield a generation of sharper, more aware, and intellectually sophisticated children. The terms “information superhighway” and “knowledge economy” entered the lexicon, and we assumed that teens would use their knowledge and understanding of technology to set themselves apart as the vanguards of this new digital era. That was the promise. But the enlightenment didn’t happen. The technology that was supposed to make young adults more aware, diversify their tastes, and improve their verbal skills has had the opposite effect. According to recent reports from the National Endowment for the Arts, most young people in the United States do not read literature, visit museums, or vote. They cannot explain basic scientific methods, recount basic American history, name their local political representatives, or locate Iraq or Israel on a map. The Dumbest Generation: How the Digital Age Stupefies Young Americans and Jeopardizes Our Future is a startling examination of the intellectual life of young adults and a timely warning of its impact on American culture and democracy. Over the last few decades, how we view adolescence itself has changed, growing from a pitstop on the road to adulthood to its own space in society, wholly separate from adult life. This change in adolescent culture has gone hand in hand with an insidious infantilization of our culture at large; as adolescents continue to disengage from the adult world, they have built their own, acquiring more spending money, steering classrooms and culture towards their own needs and interests, and now using the technology once promoted as the greatest hope for their futures to indulge in diversions, from MySpace to multiplayer video games, 24/7. Can a nation continue to enjoy political and economic predominance if its citizens refuse to grow up? Drawing upon exhaustive research, personal anecdotes, and historical and social analysis, The Dumbest Generation presents a portrait of the young American mind at this critical juncture, and lays out a compelling vision of how we might address its deficiencies. The Dumbest Generation pulls no punches as it reveals the true cost of the digital age—and our last chance to fix it.




It's Kind of a Funny Story


Book Description

Like many ambitious New York City teenagers, Craig Gilner sees entry into Manhattan's Executive Pre-Professional High School as the ticket to his future. Determined to succeed at life—which means getting into the right high school to get into the right college to get the right job—Craig studies night and day to ace the entrance exam, and does. That's when things start to get crazy. At his new school, Craig realizes that he isn't brilliant compared to the other kids; he's just average, and maybe not even that. He soon sees his once-perfect future crumbling away.