Book Description

Seventeen-year-old Rachel has her on days and her off days. She’s battled schizophrenia since eighth grade and sometimes decides not to take her medication. To avoid a relapse, she’s careful about when she skips and how often. But no matter how normal she appears, she’s still an outcast at school, a worry to her mother, and unable to let go of her father’s abandonment. She needs the intangibles, her make-believe friends, to fill the lonely gaps in her life. Then she meets Arnold, a real person, who is accepting and adoring of Rachel, and can relate to the numbing side effects of pills due to his own struggle with ADHD and depression. At first, Rachel is hesitant to even talk to Arnold, but her intangibles encourage the relationship, every part of it, even the physical stuff. That is until Arnold convinces Rachel to ditch her medication completely for marijuana. The higher Rachel goes with Arnold, the less she sees of her intangibles and the happier she feels. But things take a dangerous turn when she and Arnold befriend two classmates who take getting high to a whole other level. Eventually, Rachel’s untreated mind starts to unravel, bringing her face to face with the traumas of her past.