Truly Funny Stories Vol. 1


Book Description

The collections from beloved mother-daughter writing duo Lisa Scottoline and Francesca Serritella are among the best reviewed humor books published today and have been compared to the late greats, Erma Bombeck and Nora Ephron. Here for the first time in a fabulous eBook bundle are two of their witty and warm collections. Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog This one's for you, extraordinary ordinary women everywhere! Here Lisa Scottoline shares a hilarious collection of scenes from her real life, and she bets her life sounds a lot like yours...if you crave carbs, can't find jeans that fit, and still believe that these two things are unrelated. My Nest Isn't Empty, It Just Has More Closet Space Lisa and Francesca give their mother-daughter perspective on everything from blind dates to empty calories, as well as life with the feistiest octogenarian on the planet, Mother Mary. Three generations, triple the laughs-and the love.




Absolutely Truly


Book Description

An unsent letter in a first edition copy of Charlotte’s Web leads to a hunt for treasure in this heartwarming middle grade mystery from the author of The Mother-Daughter Book Club. Now that Truly Lovejoy’s father has been injured by an IED in Afghanistan and is having trouble finding work back home, the family moves from Texas to tiny Pumpkin Falls, New Hampshire, to take over Lovejoy’s Books, a struggling bookstore that’s been in the family for one hundred years. With two older brothers and two younger sisters clamoring for attention, her mother back in school, and everyone up to their eyebrows trying to keep Lovejoy’s Books afloat, Truly feels more overlooked than usual. So she pours herself into uncovering the mystery of an undelivered letter she finds stuck in a valuable autographed first edition of Charlotte’s Web, which subsequently goes missing from the bookshop. What’s inside the envelope leads Truly and her new Pumpkin Falls friends on a madcap treasure hunt around town, chasing clues that could spell danger. Fans of Heather Vogel Frederick’s Mother-Daughter Book Club series “will rejoice for a new series with a similarly cozy New England setting, great characters, and literary references to beloved classics” (School Library Journal).




Truly Tasteless Jokes


Book Description

The original is back. TRULY TASTELESS JOKES took America by storm and made it laugh at itself. It's all in here, disgusting, repulsive, cruel, and just plain tasteless jokes and stories that will make you smile, laugh, or groan--and love every minute of it.




Based on a True Story


Book Description

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • “Driving, wild and hilarious” (The Washington Post), here is the incredible “memoir” of the legendary actor, gambler, raconteur, and Saturday Night Live veteran. When Norm Macdonald, one of the greatest stand-up comics of all time, was approached to write a celebrity memoir, he flatly refused, calling the genre “one step below instruction manuals.” Norm then promptly took a two-year hiatus from stand-up comedy to live on a farm in northern Canada. When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, “Call it anything you damn like.”




HRT: Husband Replacement Therapy


Book Description

An outrageously funny, heartbreaking read – when Ruby finds out she has cancer on the brink of her 50th birthday, she decides to start living instead of complying... Ruby has always been the generous mediator among her friends, family and colleagues, which is why they've all turned up to celebrate her 50th birthday. But after too many glasses of champers, Ruby takes her moment in the spotlight to reveal what she really thinks of every one of them. She accuses her husband of having an affair and lambasts her mother for a lifetime of playing her three daughters against each other – it's blisteringly brutal. As the stunned gathering gawks at Ruby, the birthday girl reveals that she has terminal cancer, and has cashed in her life savings to take her two estranged sisters cruising into the sunset for a dose of HRT – Husband Replacement Therapy. But is Ruby being courageous or ruthlessly selfish? Praise for Kathy Lette: 'Fabulous, fast-paced, funny & unapologetically female. Nobody does it better.' DEBORAH FRANCES-WHITE, THE GUILTY FEMINIST 'Deliciously rude and darkly funny, but with compassion and humanity at its heart. Read with relish.' NICOLE KIDMAN 'Kathy Lette can turn from raunchy farce to the most tender emotion in a trice.' STEPHEN FRY




Guys Read: Funny Business


Book Description

Funny Business, the first volume in Jon Scieszka's Guys Read Library of Great Reading, features ten short stories guaranteed to delight, amuse, and possibly make you spit your milk in your friend's face. There's something for everyone in this collection of short stories from some of the funniest writers around. This hilarious, offbeat first installment in the Guys Read Library is 100% grade-A humor, guaranteed to have kids of all ages asking for more. Authors include Mac Barnett, Eoin Colfer, Christopher Paul Curtis, Kate DiCamillo & Jon Scieszka, Paul Feig, Jack Gantos, Jeff Kinney, David Lubar, Adam Rex, and David Yoo, with illustrations by Adam Rex.




Storm Dancer


Book Description

Dahoud is a troubled hero with a dark past. A former siege commander, he atones for his atrocities by hiding his identity and protecting women from war's violence. But he hides a deep secret: demonic possession. How can he shield the woman he loves from the evil inside him? Principled weather magician, Merida, brings rain to a parched desert land. When her magical dance rouses more than storms, she needs to overcome her scruples to escape from danger. Thrust together, Dahoud and Merida must fight for freedom and survival. How can they trust each other when their hearts burn with the hatred of betrayal? Storm Dancer is a dark-epic fantasy novel. It deals with dark issues and is not recommended for readers under 16. The fantasy world is inspired by ancient Middle Eastern cultures - Persians, Egyptians, Babylonians, Hittites. The writing is atmospheric, exciting and intense. It is a big book, offering many hours of reading pleasure. British English.




Bloodsucking Fiends


Book Description

Jody never asked to become a vampire. But when she wakes up under an alley Dumpster with a badly burned arm, an aching back, superhuman strength, and a distinctly Nosferatuan thirst, she realizes the decision has been made for her. Making the transition from the nine-to-five grind to an eternity of nocturnal prowlings is going to take some doing, however, and that's where C. Thomas Flood fits in. A would-be Kerouac from Incontinence, Indiana, Tommy (to his friends) is biding his time night-clerking and frozen-turkey bowling in a San Francisco Safeway. But all that changes when a beautiful undead redhead walks through the door...and proceeds to rock Tommy's life—and afterlife—in ways he never thought possible.




Funny Stories For 6 Year Olds Gross Out Book


Book Description

El Ninjo is going to demonstrate how he takes advantage of each single adventure that he is experiencing in various hilarious situations of life in Volume 1 and the situations go like this: * The Wake Upper Popper * The Straight Up Breakfast Table Shot * The Flying Carpet * The Backpack Burster * The Gasification In The Car * The Neighbour Detonator * The Imaginary Bone Shot Or Fart Expressionism * The Blue Hour In The Elevator (This is a brand new and never before released story. It is included for the first time in this new and enhanced color and audio version of the Fart Book) * The Delivery Boy Truck Detonater * The Stinky Tsunami * The Lego Blower * The Hand Stinker * The Marshmallow Shooter * The Steamy Sweat Blanket Pooper * The Gas Eruption in the Chicken Coop and many more... In Volume 3 he faces the most dangerous animals. He uses his bean blowing way in order to save his life! He gets attacked by the lion, the leopard, the crocodile, and many more dangerous animals in the jungle and in the end there is only one animal that he feels save to be around with. The list of the African Bean Fart Adventures in the Jungle goes like this: * Arrival At The Lodge With Poop & Pump * The Safari Mobil Breakdown * The Jungle Bang * The Bean Slam'n Smoke * The Artistic Liana Salto Blaster * The Tears Gas Boom * The Gorilla Sound Cloud and many more steamy Kenja bean blowing stories... One last word of WARNING from El Ninjo himself: "Don't forget to check your shorts after you finish reading...because you'll laugh so hard you might tear your pants. I heard some scary story about a brave 8 year old boy who got so excited and laughed so hard about one of my fart whiffing episodes, he tore his underpants! Don't ask me about the reaction of his Mom who had to wash and mend her son's poopy ripped pants. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha - This one is a real gag! This boy is now part of the flatulent secret society!"




Who's a Good Boy?


Book Description

From the authors of the New York Times bestselling novels It Devours! and Welcome to Night Vale and the creators of the #1 international podcast of the same name, comes a collection of episodes from Season Four of their hit podcast, featuring an introduction by the authors, a foreword by Jonny Sun, behind-the-scenes commentary, and original illustrations. In June of 2012, the creators of Welcome to Night Vale began airing twice-monthly podcasts. Their hopes were that they could reach people outside their close circles. What they didn’t know was that a year after the first show aired, the fanbase had far exceeded their expectations, launching the podcast into the #1 spot on iTunes. Over the years, its popularity has surged by mega proportions, hitting more than 100 million downloads, and Night Vale has expanded to a successful live multi-cast international touring stage show and two New York Times bestselling novels (Welcome to Night Vale and It Devours!), and a new podcast network Night Vale Presents. Now with Who’s a Good Boy? Season Four of the podcast is available in book form, offering a valuable reference guide to past episodes. Featuring a foreword by twitter personality and highly regarded author Jonny Sun, original introductions by Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor, fascinating behind-the-scenes commentary by cast members and supporters, and gorgeous illustrations by series artist Jessica Hayworth accompanying each episode, this book will thrill fans of the podcast and those new to the amazing universe of Night Vale.