Book Description

"The first and only all-encompassing action plan for the end of life. When it comes to death, we are all beginners. What we could use is a clear-eyed, bighearted friend to hold our hand and walk us through not just the practical decisions we'll have to make in the coming months and years, but also how to engage with loved ones and face our fears. That is why one of the leading hospice and palliative medicine doctors in the country and an experienced caregiver and journalist teamed up to guide you, your friends, and your family through the unfamiliar to-do lists and the emotional and medical choices that often overwhelm us. You'll learn: Why your partner may not be the best choice to speak for you if you can't speak for yourself; That you can choose how much (or how little) you want to know about your condition; That there are constructive ways to manage your fear of death; That there are strategies for keeping your kids (and their spouses) from fighting over your stuff; How to break the news of a diagnosis to your employer; Whether to toss old love letters and share family secrets; How to face friends who might not be as helpful as you'd hoped; How to adapt your sex life. The guide begins well before a diagnosis and ends well after the memorial. No subject is too small: Did you know you can buy a casket at Walmart? That cremation isn't the greenest option? That your 'When I Die' file should include not just passwords, but also letters to the people you love, and maybe your favorite family recipes? You'll find out how to get the most out of a hospital visit (and that a medical student may be your best ally), along with tips on how to get real information out of your doctor. There are also lessons for caregivers, like how to get help at home, shut down social media accounts, clean out the condo, and write a good eulogy. 'There is nothing wrong with you for dying,' B] Miller and Shoshana Berger write in their introduction. 'Our ultimate purpose here isn't so much to help you die as it is to tree up as much life as possible until you do.'"--Dust jacket.