Armitage Shanks and the Footballer's Bones


Book Description

The Wildcats are in trouble again! Down on the ground, there?s got to be some way of raising funds, and their coach comes up with health food bars. Only trouble is they?re inedible, and whoever sells the most gets an all-expenses-paid trip to Canberra. Up in the air, though, Splinters and Nuke are on their way to London to retrieve their best player, Gazza, who?s been deported back to England with her mum, and the two boys get up to the sort of in-flight antics that have made travelling footballers notorious. Grappling as always with the problem of how to make up the numbers, someone remembers a genius footballer called Armitage Shanks who registered for the Under 6s, but never turned up for training or played a single game. Then the obvious question: how do you know he was a genius? And (to Splinters) the equally obvious answer: he had great boots! But when Armitage Shanks turns up, it?s a bigger surprise than the Wildcats have bargained for. A crazy adventure with an unexpectedly moving conclusion, this is one of John Larkin?s funniest books in the series - but it also offers a little insight into success and fame.




Dog Boy


Book Description

Harry Highpants hates corned beef and feeds his dinner to Munchie the dog. But when Munchie leaves his dog food untouched day after day, Harry's mum is suspicious. So there's only one thing for Harry to do...




Horse Girl


Book Description

Rebecca Yallop loved horses. She loved everything about them until she became one! A hilarious story about big sisters from one of Australia s funniest writers and best-loved illustrators.




I Hate Witnessing


Book Description

Presents ways to tell people about Jesus Christ, effectively and without fear.




Roger's Profanisaurus


Book Description

No lavatory is complete without a Profanisaurus! After all, what else could you read whilst you're sitting on the 'chod bin' trying not to 'breach the hull' or commit a 'Wee-Harvey Oswald'? Don't know the difference between 'stabbing the cat' and 'feeding the ducks'? Don't know when to take a 'monkey's fag break? You need Roger's Profanisaurus - the ultimate in schoolboy humour (that is definitely not for children). Roger Mellie presents this updated dictionary of swearing that gives a hilarious new angle to many previously innocently-used words. New vastly expanded edition. Completely revised and updated. An entertaining glossary of vulgarity, expletives, colourful obscenity and downright filth; Ideal for use in the home and office




Pause, The


Book Description

Declan seems to have it all: a family that loves him, friends he's known for years, a beautiful girlfriend he would go to the ends of the earth for. But there's something in Declan's past that just won't go away, that pokes and scratches at his thoughts when he's at his most vulnerable. Declan feels as if nothing will take away that pain that he has buried deep inside for so long. So he makes the only decision he thinks he has left: the decision to end it all. Or does he? As the train approaches and Declan teeters at the edge of the platform, two versions of his life are revealed. In one, Declan watches as his body is destroyed and the lives of those who loved him unravel. In the other, Declan pauses before he jumps. And this makes all the difference. One moment. One pause. One whole new life.




Roger's Profanisaurus


Book Description

From the playground to the boardroom, this lexicon of bad language makes, arguably, a more important contribution to the everyday vocabulary of the British Isles than the Oxford dictionary. Now, with over 10,000 entries, this edition features the latest in expletives, sexual obscenities and lavatorial euphemisms.




Australian Children's Books: 1989-2000


Book Description

All Australian children's books published from 1989 to 2000 are listed in this essential reference for those who appreciate the richness of Australian writing for children. Following the same format as volumes 1 and 2 in this series chronicling books published as early as 1774, entries include publishing details, the number of illustrations, and the awards received for each book. This third volume follows the continuing careers of authors such as Mem Fox, Bob Graham, Robin Klein, and Paul Jennings, and traces changes in the popularity of Australian themes and settings to identify publishing trends. Varied cultural aspects of modern-day life are shown, from globalization, commercialism, and the rise of the middle class in Asia to desktop publishing, outcome-based school curricula, and the modern obsession with celebrities all of which are reflected in the type and quantity of books produced by Australian writers and publishers. The wealth of included material will extend researchers' understanding of the range of Australian children's books. "




Lasagne Brain


Book Description

Eric Underwood, also known as Spaghetti Legs and Pizza Features, serves up the final course in the pasta trilogy: Lasagne Brain. Eric would love to be an intellectual and here he unexpectedly takes the journey from boyhood to manhood, and the only question he wants to ask is: can he go back? With his mind-boggling essays driving teachers out of their minds, the love of his life Veronica Roberts dumping him, his best friend hanging round Woolies with a trolley full of bananas hoping to pick up more than potassium poisoning, and his father watching pre-recorded golf, there’s only one thing for Eric to do: retreat to his bedroom in self-imposed exile. Eric’s ambition is to lock himself away for the rest of his teenage years. And if it wasn’t for the Teletubbies and the arrival of Imelda, the Scots girl he French kissed in an English pub, he might just have made it!




Greek Americans


Book Description

This is an engrossing account of Greek Americans--their history, strengths, conflicts, aspirations, and contributions. This is the story of immigrants, their children and grandchildren, most of whom maintain an attachment to Greek ethnic identity even as they have become one of this country's most successful ethnic groups.