Bernie Finds a Friend


Book Description

Travel with Bernie as he goes on an adventure, experiencing a new and unlikely friendship. He finds out that sometimes you can become friends with someone you never thought possible! Also, look for the first two books in the series; Bernies Journey and Bernie Goes to the Beach!




Bernie And I


Book Description

Bernie and I is a book about a man’s experiences with dogs from childhood to old age, and his dog Bernie.




Bernie and Flora


Book Description

Bernie the bear and Flora the duck have been best friends for a long, long time. They enjoy the same things and love to work together in Berniee(tm)s garden, where he grows the most beautiful flowers.But one day, Flora arrives at Berniee(tm)s house to find that his flowers have all disappeared! And theree(tm)s no sign of Bernie either.




Bernie Finds A Friend


Book Description

Bernie takes a liking to a small stray kitten that was hanging around the house.




Pat Conroy


Book Description

“Bernie Schein is the funniest man alive, or so he has dogmatically maintained during the burdensome decades I have known him. . . . [He is] by turns hysterically funny, wildly neurotic, uniquely sensitive, and heartbreakingly honest.”—Pat Conroy Pat Conroy, the bestselling author of The Prince of Tides and The Great Santini among many other books, was beloved by millions of readers. Bernie Schein was his best friend from the time they met in a high-school pickup basketball game in Beaufort, South Carolina, until Conroy’s death in 2016. Both were popular but also outsiders as a Jew and a Catholic military brat in the small-town Bible-Belt South, and they bonded. Wiseass and smart aleck, loudmouths both, they shared an ebullient sense of humor and romanticism, were mesmerized by the highbrow and reveled in the low, and would sacrifice entire evenings and afternoons to endless conversation. As young teachers in the Beaufort area and later in Atlanta, they were activists in the civil rights struggle and against institutional racism and bigotry. Bernie knew intimately the private family story of the Conroys and his friend’s difficult relationship with his Marine Corps colonel father that Pat would draw on repeatedly in his fiction. A love letter and homage, and a way to share the Pat he knew, this book collects Bernie’s cherished memories about the gregarious, welcoming, larger-than-life man who remained his best friend, even during the years they didn’t speak. It offers a trove of insights and anecdotes that will be treasured by Pat Conroy’s many devoted fans.




Where Did I Go Right?


Book Description

Beginning in the William Morris mail room in 1955, Bernie Brillstein wanted only three things: “to walk into a restaurant and have people know who I am…to be the guy who gets the phone calls and doesn’t have to make them…to represent the one performer people must have.” Throughout his long career at the top of the entertainment industry––as TV and movie producer, agent and brilliant personal manager––Brillstein has accomplished it all. Where Did I Go Right? is Brillstein’s street-smart, funny, and thoroughly human story of a life in show business. With his trademark wit and candor, he speaks out for the first time about his feud with Mike Ovitz, and how it felt to pass the leadership of his company to his partner, Brad Grey, and “no longer be the king.” He describes his close relationship with John Belushi and what it was like being alone with Belushi’s body as it lay “stretched out across two cramped seats in a tiny jet, wrapped up in a body bag” on the way to his funeral. He shares stories about Jim Hensen and Gilda Radner, about Lorne Michaels and the early days of Saturday Night Live. He takes us behind the scenes at such hits as The Blues Brothers, Ghostbusters, and The Muppet Show. Brillstein also reveals his secrets about how to survive and prosper in Hollywood, the real meaning of “the art of the deal,” the difference between “hot” and “good,” and why instinct is so crucial to the future of the entertainment industry. “Becoming successful is the most fun of all. I’m not talking about being successful or staying successful. I mean the getting there, the instant you arrive, and for the first time you think, ‘Where did I go right?’” After eight years, Phoenix Books is re-releasing this bestseller, with an updated epilogue from Bernie Brillstein entitled, “Still going right.”




Paw and Order


Book Description

In the seventh installment in the brilliant New York Times bestselling mystery series, canine narrator Chet and PI Bernie Little journey to Washington, DC, and the dog-eat-dog world of our nation’s capital. Stephen King has called Chet “a canine Sam Spade full of joie de vivre.” Robert B. Parker dubbed Spencer Quinn’s writing “major league prose.” Now the beloved team returns in another suspenseful novel that finds Chet sniffing around the capital city and using his street smarts to uncover a devilish plot. Chet and Bernie pay a visit to Bernie’s girlfriend, Suzie Sanchez, an ace reporter living in far-off Washington, DC. She’s working on a big story she can’t talk about, but when her source, a mysterious Brit with possible intelligence connections, runs into trouble of the worst kind, Bernie suddenly finds himself under arrest. Meanwhile Chet gets to know a powerful DC operative who may or may not have the goods on an ambitious politician. Soon Chet and Bernie are sucked into an international conspiracy, battling unfamiliar forces under the blinking red eyes of a strange bird that Chet notices from the get-go but seems to have slipped by everybody else. Most menacing of all is Barnum, a guinea pig with the fate of the nation in his tiny paws. As Harry Truman famously quipped, “If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog.” Too bad he didn’t get to meet Chet!




Thereby Hangs a Tail


Book Description

Bernie Little and his canine companion, Chet, are private investigators. Both have had some setbacks in life - Bernie in combat, Chet in K-9 dog-training school - but together they make up a team like no other. In Thereby Hangs a Tail, Bernie and Chet are hired to investigate threats made against an unlikely target - a pretty, pampered show dog named Princess. What seems like a joke turns serious when Princess and her owner are abducted. And to make matters worse, Bernie's on-again, off-again girlfriend, reporter Susie Sanchez, disappears too. When Chet gets separated from Bernie, he tries to put the pieces together, find his way home, and save the day. With genuine suspense and intrigue, combined with humour and insight into the special bond between man and dog, Thereby Hangs a Tail is the much awaited sequel to the fantastic, funny, New York Times bestselling Dog On It. It will keep everyone talking - and chuckling.




Dog on It


Book Description

I could smell him - or rather the booze on his breath - before he even opened the door, but my sense of smell is pretty good, probably better than yours. So begins this fabulous, funny new detective novel featuring Bernie, a slightly down-at-heel PI; and his off sider, Chet, a dog - and the captivating narrator of the story. Chet may have flunked out of police school (I'd been the best leaper in K-9 class, which had led to all the trouble in a way I couldn't remember exactly, although blood was involved), but he's just as much a detective as Bernie - superior, sometimes, in his insight into human foibles. In Dog On It, their first adventure, Chet and Bernie investigate the disappearance of a teenage girl who may or may not have been kidnapped, but who's definitely gotten herself mixed up with some very unsavoury characters.




I Ain't Scared of You


Book Description

A laugh-out-loud humor book from one of the most celebrated comedians, Bernie Mac, the star of Fox's The Bernie Mac Show, winner of the prestigious Peabody Award. The Chicago-bred performer and royal king of the Original Kings of Comedy, Bernie Mac, has won over countless fans of cutting comedy and family humor with an edgy show that tells it like it is but never loses heart. No surprise, Mac has earned a reputation as perhaps the truest voice of modern humor. Here, in his debut book, Mac brilliantly captures the R-rated side of his comedic genius in print. Touring through a wide range of topics with equal parts insight and irreverence, Bernie presents a way of looking at the world guaranteed to make you laugh. Tackling superstar athletes, the movie business, his fellow comedians, his marriage, and, of course, his friends and family, Mac offers side-splitting riffs on sex, religion, hygiene, money, and more. Nobody is safe; nothing is sacred. Not even Bernie himself. Throughout I Ain't Scared of You, Mac turns his humor inward, firing off hilarious self-deprecating salvos about his golf game and his own hypocrisies. Bernie Mac's hit show and his vital live performances have earned him critical acclaim and international popularity. Now, I Ain't Scared of You reveals his humor whole—unpretentious, unafraid, and unbelievably funny and raw.