Book Description
Bully . . . described in the Concise English Dictionary:"a browbeating person, esp someone who is habitually cruel toother weaker people;"intimidate with persistently aggressive or violent behaviour, orby using threats of violence;"These two descriptions are certainly true, but to the victims whohave so generously submitted their stories for inclusion in this book . . .they would barely be adequate. I have been one such victim. But my taleof woe is NOTHING compared with the humiliation, embarrassment,degradation and so much more that many of the people featured in thisbook have suffered, many still suffering.The suggestion of writing a book about bullying was put to me someyears ago . . . I cannot actually recall who did suggest it, or when, but itcertainly planted a seed in my mind. Research through those years hassuggested that many have written books before me, but no-one seems tohave actually devoted a book almost entirely to stories of victims . . . thiswas my goal. In communicating with these and other victims, both currentand past, I found that they all appeared to have the same message . . . justhow therapeutic it was to be able to . . . just talk about it . . . get it off theirchests. Of course, there are always the exceptions. Sadly, one particularvictim has been so badly scarred that he found it too difficult to write hisexperiences at all. And writing their stories will never change the fact that these people have been bullied. Many have had counselling, many havenot . . . many are still undergoing this. Some cases are far more serious thanothers . . . some have undergone the court process . . . others are still goingthrough this . . .The stories within these pages vary hugely . . . from supposedly minorcases through to some which are far some serious. But irrespective of theseverity of them, the effects on the victims have been horrendous. Manyhave made my blood boil.Doing this has given me a very small idea of just how mammoth thisproblem is and that it is EVERYWHERE. No-one is immune, nor is anyinstitution, any situation. It takes place at any age, any gender, any faith,anywhere, any time.Many of the victims were bullied in their teens and/or childhood,and some of these people were raised in the years prior to bullying beingrecognized and/or acknowledged. For some victims it is past tense, forothers a very current and continuing nightmare. Some stories have comefrom various work places. There are even a couple written by people whohave been bullied and have been bullies themselves.What has disturbed and infuriated me throughout (and believe me, Iwould NOT have wanted to have my blood pressure nor stress levels takenwhile doing this), something that does appear to be a common thread,particularly with the stories taken from schools . . . in seeking help, justiceand compensation through the appropriate channels, the education andlegal systems, in almost every case it appears that that the perpetrator/s is/are the ones who have been supported . . . NOT the victims. Most if notall schools maintain that they have a ''bullying policy'' in place . . . but givenall that is covered in these stories, and some of the outcomes, I do have toquestion . . . just how effective are these policies and who are they aimingto help?In one particular case, the victim lost her father, which was tragicenough in itself, but then . . . from what I can see, she was bullied . . . partlyfor this reason? Losing her father? WHY? What is the MENTALITYof bullies?A few of these histories are quite long and, as previously mentioned,some victims continue their fight for compensation and/or justice. I haveand do feel so much for the parents, families of the victims and for thevictims themselves. Overall from what I have learned, the attitudes of theschools leave me cold. I am not saying that this applies in all cases worldwide . . . goodness knows, those in the following pages are only the smallest drop in the ocean compared with the amount o
