How to Not Drive Like an Asshole Or Do Other Stupid Shit


Book Description

This is not a kid's book! It is a non-filtered view from an experienced law enforcement officer who has a unique, dry, sarcastic sense of humor. There is a lot of potty-mouth language in this book, so if you're easily offended, you may want to pass. Sgt. 'A. Hole' has experience in military law enforcement, state corrections, county corrections, municipal, tribal and county law enforcement. You WILL enjoy this book.....if you actually have a sense of humor!




Traffic


Book Description

Driving is a fact of life. We are all spending more and more time on the road, and traffic is an issue we face everyday. This book will make you think about it in a whole new light. We have always had a passion for cars and driving. Now Traffic offers us an exceptionally rich understanding of that passion. Vanderbilt explains why traffic jams form, outlines the unintended consequences of our attempts to engineer safety and even identifies the most common mistakes drivers make in parking lots. Based on exhaustive research and interviews with driving experts and traffic officials around the globe, Traffic gets under the hood of the quotidian activity of driving to uncover the surprisingly complex web of physical, psychological and technical factors that explain how traffic works.




The No Asshole Rule


Book Description

The definitive guide to working with -- and surviving -- bullies, creeps, jerks, tyrants, tormentors, despots, backstabbers, egomaniacs, and all the other assholes who do their best to destroy you at work. "What an asshole!" How many times have you said that about someone at work? You're not alone! In this groundbreaking book, Stanford University professor Robert I. Sutton builds on his acclaimed Harvard Business Review article to show you the best ways to deal with assholes...and why they can be so destructive to your company. Practical, compassionate, and in places downright funny, this guide offers: Strategies on how to pinpoint and eliminate negative influences for good Illuminating case histories from major organizations A self-diagnostic test and a program to identify and keep your own "inner jerk" from coming out The No Asshole Rule is a New York Times, Wall Street Journal, USA Today and Business Week bestseller.




Way of the Asshole


Book Description

Aaron Smith is a stand-up comedian, writer, and an unofficial sociologist. Born and raised in the Harlem section of Manhattan, in New York City, he is the eldest of two children. Aaron brings his point of view to light and shows you how it can be used in your everyday life. His blunt and sometimes harsh honesty tells it how it is and shows that many people like to hide from the ugly truth. He provides a way of being someone out of the ordinary and a lifestyle that some have but never go the whole nine yardsThe Way Of The Asshole. It is more than just a name for calling someone or saying to someone when you dont agree with them. Maybe just call yourself one because you think its cool. Being an asshole is more than just saying it, you have to be about it. You must live, breathe, eat and sleep it in everything you do. And this is a start in the right direction.







You Drive Like an Asshole


Book Description

You Drive Like an Asshole includes 101 letters to tell off all the asshole drivers you encounter on the road, each letter conveniently perforated so you can tear it out and give it to the desired offender. The world is full of asshole drivers -- but now you can fight back! Ever wish you could leave a note for the asshole not paying attention to the road, or the asshole hauling the speedboat, or the asshole with the Duct-taped-on fender? Now you can! Whether it's the asshole driving on a flat tire, the asshole who blocked you in, the asshole bus driver, or the senior citizen asshole, you should never get on the road without this useful book ever again! Letters include: Dear Asshole Too Young to Afford That Car Dear Rush-Hour-Taxi-Driving Asshole Dear Asshole Driving Way Too Slow Dear Asshole Driving Way Too Fast Dear Unmarked-Police-Car Asshole Dear Asshole Driving on a Mini Spare Tire Dear VNTY-PLT ASSHL Dear Asshole Driving in the Carpool Lane And more!




The Art Of Seduction


Book Description

Which sort of seducer could you be? Siren? Rake? Cold Coquette? Star? Comedian? Charismatic? Or Saint? This book will show you which. Charm, persuasion, the ability to create illusions: these are some of the many dazzling gifts of the Seducer, the compelling figure who is able to manipulate, mislead and give pleasure all at once. When raised to the level of art, seduction, an indirect and subtle form of power, has toppled empires, won elections and enslaved great minds. In this beautiful, sensually designed book, Greene unearths the two sides of seduction: the characters and the process. Discover who you, or your pursuer, most resembles. Learn, too, the pitfalls of the anti-Seducer. Immerse yourself in the twenty-four manoeuvres and strategies of the seductive process, the ritual by which a seducer gains mastery over their target. Understand how to 'Choose the Right Victim', 'Appear to Be an Object of Desire' and 'Confuse Desire and Reality'. In addition, Greene provides instruction on how to identify victims by type. Each fascinating character and each cunning tactic demonstrates a fundamental truth about who we are, and the targets we've become - or hope to win over. The Art of Seduction is an indispensable primer on the essence of one of history's greatest weapons and the ultimate power trip. From the internationally bestselling author of The 48 Laws of Power, Mastery, and The 33 Strategies Of War.




AM I THE ASSHOLE?


Book Description

"A hilariously irreverent take on the modern memoir....you'll never look at memoirs the same way again." -Boston Globe "A heartbreaking and hilarious memoir, Dr. Brandon Day takes us on his lifelong odyssey of hellish introspection and painstaking self-discovery. He chronicles his battles with homelessness, addiction, bosses, teachers, cable companies, neighbors, his children, and his ex-wife to answer the existential question that burns inside all of us, "Am I the Asshole?" -NEW YORK TIMES Brandon Day grew up in an abusive home. All through his childhood, his sadistic and overbearing parents tortured him by forcing him to perform all sorts of unthinkable acts such as brushing his teeth and doing his homework, and by the time he was ten years old he had already become addicted to Nintendo. He would spend hours upon hours in his bedroom playing games such as Mike Tyson's Punchout and The Legend of Zelda as a means to escape the suffering he endured at the hands of his cruel and merciless parents. Without any real skills, talent or drive, Dr. Brandon Day knew that if he wanted to become rich and famous that he would have to tell his story. He would have to write a really self-righteous memoir where he plays the victim and shits all over his friends and family, complains about how hard his life is, and then brags about how he overcame it all. That would be his only way out of the insufferable torture of having hardly any followers on social media. But upward mobility required crafting the perfect resilience narrative. He had to prove to himself and the rest of the world that he was not just lazy, and he was an "overcomer," made stronger by all the bullshit he had endured at the hands of not only his parents, but other family members, friends, co-workers, teachers, wives, ex-wives, bosses, neighbors, and even his own children. However, the truth was more complicated. After he graduated from college, Dr. Brandon's mom and dad kept breaking his balls about smoking too much pot and finding a fucking job already. If only it were that easy. Eventually his parents would kick him out of their house and even force him to pay for his own car insurance when he was just a young, scared, 26-years-old little boy. Dr. Brandon learns to confront his own past filled with many secrets: a marijuana stash he hid in his sock drawer all through high school, phone calls from debt collectors who use strange numbers to try to trick him into picking up, dozens of lost car keys and wallets he never found, and sometimes even peeing in the kitchen sink when he is drunk. All of which led to the unbecoming desperation of a 40-year-old man forced to a reckoning with his own identity. Although Dr. Brandon would go on to graduate from college and become a high school guidance counselor, he found that sweet-ass summer vacations and a strong teacher's union didn't necessarily mean safety from judgment from the patriarchy or American meritocracy. Both a chronicle of the American Dream and an indictment of it, this searing debut memoir exposes the price we pay for the promise of a bright future. Dr. Brandon Day's story challenges our ideas of what it means to overcome—and live life on our own terms, even if those terms mean that you're kind of an asshole.




The Church of Fuck You - Holy Shit Edition


Book Description

This book is for people who love to laugh at the stupid things that happen in this world. It is designed to make people think, to laugh, to get angry and to want to change the world.




Remember to Love


Book Description

KARO SEROVIAN, ALONG WITH HIS MOTHER AND FATHER, MIGRATE TO AMERICA FROM ARMENIA IN SEARCH OF THE AMERICAN DREAM. BUT SOMEHOW KARO FINDS HIMSELF ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE LAW WHILE HE CONSTANTLY STRUGGLS WITH HIS DESIRE TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT, BUT OFTENTIMES FALLING SHORT OF HIS INTENDED GOAL. MEET KYRA, KAROS YOUNGER SISTER WHO IDOLIZES KARO, BUT AS SOMETIMES HAPPENS WITH FAMILIES AND THE PASSAGE OF TIME, THEY FIND THEMSELVES AT ODDS WITH EACH OTHER AND HOW THEYVE CHOSEN TO LIVE THEIR LIVES. WILL KARO EVER FIND HIS PURPOSE IN LIFE? WILL KYRA EVER FIND IT IN HER HEART TO FORGIVE KARO HIS FAILINGS? COME ALONG ON THIS JOURNEY OF LOVE, FRIENDSHIP, TRAGEDY AND THE HOPE OF REDEMPTION AS THE SEROVIAN SAGA UNFOLDS.