I Want You to Shut the F#ck Up


Book Description

D.L. Hughley calls it like he sees it, discussing everything from dating to former president Barack Obama with sharp, thoughtful commentary “The best book since The Hunger Games. First he was a King of Comedy; now he’s the king of comedy authors.”—Chris Rock The American dream is in dire need of a wake-up call. A f*cked up society is like an addict: if you are in denial, then things are going to keep getting worse until you hit bottom. According to D. L. Hughley, that's the direction in which America is headed. In I Want You to Shut the F*ck Up, D.L. explains how we've become a nation of fat sissies playing Chicken Little, but in reverse: The sky is falling, but we're supposed to act like everything's fine. D.L. just points out the sobering facts: there is no standard of living by which we are the best. In terms of life expectancy, we're 36th—tied with Cuba; in terms of literacy, we're 20th—behind Kazakhstan. Things are bad now and they're only going to get worse. Unless, of course, you sit down, shut the f*ck up, and listen to what D. L. Hughley has to say. I Want You to Shut the F*ck Up is a slap to the political senses, a much needed ass-kicking of the American sense of entitlement. In these pages, D. L. Hughley calls it like he sees it, offering his hilarious yet insightful thoughts on: • Our supposedly post-racial society • The similarities between America the superpower and the drunk idiot at the bar • Why apologizing is not the answer to controversy, especially when you meant what you said • Why civil rights leaders are largely to blame for black people not being represented on television • And more!




Go the F**k to Sleep


Book Description

The #1 New York Times Bestseller: “A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep” (NPR). “Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.” Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.




If You Give a Kid a Cookie, Will He Shut the F**k Up?


Book Description

Before they Go the Fuck to Sleep, they need to Shut the Fuck Up If you give a kid a cookie, will he shut the fuck up? That is the question at the heart of this hilarious, deeply honest, profanity-laced book for parents who will do whatever it takes for a moment's peace. What really happens when you give in to your child's tantrums? The events that follow this seemingly simple act will test parents to the breaking point...while entertaining the millions of us who have been there ourselves (and lived to tell). Also a cautionary and instructive tale for new parents, If You Give a Kid a Cookie, Will He Shut the F**k Up? is a must-have for every family library collection. Just keep it on the top shelf.




How I Learned to Shut the Fuck Up


Book Description

In a interconnected world- there are so many facets to the inner world of the multitude of humans each of us will have to come in contact with during our life time. Instead of trying to be accepted and or trying to persuade or convince others why you should be loved- one should know x understand their self worth. Having self love x self confidence- coming to terms that not everyone will love nor accept you. Though that is more than fine- for there are many that will cherish you for that which you are and that which to are morphing to become. A piece written on and about the human condition [Anthropology x Psychology]- that which one may face or do and how to have peace in the mist of it all or personal acknowledgment- that said individual can up root. Knowing that they a capable of doing all which they desire- while honoring the life x rights of all and a reminder or telling that they have a choice in all facets of life-[Health, Wealth, Love, Happiness] internal and out. A reflection- an acknowledgment that no life isn't a fairytale yet that one's life x the life of humanity can be made better- yet it starts one person at a time x in daily civil human to human interaction. -Armand Cook




Shut The F*ck Up and LOVE


Book Description

We as individuals want to succeed and achieve our goals on an immense level. It's in our DNA to be creative and evolve. Unfortunately you know what else can be in our DNA? Self doubt, procrastination, guilt, stubbornness, asshole-ness, bitchiness, fakeness, fear and the list goes on! We are not immortal, the Unicorns run this sh*t! We are on borrowed time! Learn to live today and stop holding on to bullsh*t! Be fearless and let it go! SHUT THE F*CK UP and LOVE!




Foreverland


Book Description

A Recommended Read from: Good Morning America • Good Housekeeping • Esquire • Shondaland • Atlanta Journal-Constitution • The Week • Lit Hub • Publishers Weekly An illuminating, poignant, and savagely funny examination of modern marriage from Ask Polly advice columnist Heather Havrilesky If falling in love is the peak of human experience, then marriage is the slow descent down that mountain, on a trail built from conflict, compromise, and nagging doubts. Considering the limited economic advantages to marriage, the deluge of other mate options a swipe away, and the fact that almost half of all marriages in the United States end in divorce anyway, why do so many of us still chain ourselves to one human being for life? In Foreverland, Heather Havrilesky illustrates the delights, aggravations, and sublime calamities of her marriage over the span of fifteen years, charting an unpredictable course from meeting her one true love to slowly learning just how much energy is required to keep that love aflame. This refreshingly honest portrait of a marriage reveals that our relationships are not simply “happy” or “unhappy,” but something much murkier—at once unsavory, taxing, and deeply satisfying. With tales of fumbled proposals, harrowing suburban migrations, external temptations, and the bewildering insults of growing older, Foreverland is a work of rare candor and insight. Havrilesky traces a path from daydreaming about forever for the first time to understanding what a tedious, glorious drag forever can be.




Please Shut The F**k Up!


Book Description

Please Shut The F**k Up! is a hilarious conversation piece to have around the house or as a funny gag gift to enjoy while exploring relatable situations where you would simply like someone to cease talking. The book is brutally honest encouraging laughter as it dives into everyday situations you most likely have encountered at some point. Please Shut The F**k Up! is perfect for that special someone in your life from family, friends, acquaintances, and everyone in between. This is a children's book designed for grown ups so it may not be suitable for kids, but as a responsible adult, we're sure you'll make the right decision. Enjoy!




OCP: Oracle Database 12c Administrator Certified Professional Study Guide


Book Description

An updated guide for an updated certification exam! As the most popular database software in the world, Oracle Database 12c has been updated for the first time in nearly six years and the changes are significant. This study guide reviews how Oracle 12c allows multiple instances to be used simultaneously via the cloud. You'll sharpen your skills to prepare for the three levels of certification: Oracle Certified Associate, Oracle Certified Professional, and Oracle Certified Master. Workbook exercise appendix, test engine, chapter review questions, electronic flashcards, searchable PDF glossary, and two bonus practice exams all help to enhance your preparation to take the Oracle 12c exam. Addresses such topics as: database architecture, configuring and recoverability, configuring backup specifications, and performing user-managed backup and recovery Reviews how to use RMAN to create backups, perform recovery, and duplicate a database Looks at performing tablespace point-in-time recovery and using flashback technology Covers diagnosing the database, managing memory, managing resources, and automating tasks Focusing 100 percent on the exam objectives, OCP: Oracle Database 12c Administrator Certified Professional Study Guide is designed for those who feel they are ready to attempt this challenging exam.




The Comics Journal


Book Description




How to Survive America


Book Description

"Dispels the myth that people of color are somehow predisposed to poor health, blaming systemic injustice in the health care system." —New York Times Book Review Legendary comedian D.L. Hughley uses his "hilarious yet soul-shaking" (Black Enterprise) humor to confront racism's unjust impact on the health and wellbeing of Blacks and minorities White people love survival guides. But have you noticed they’re always about ridiculous activities in locations far from home, with chapters like “How to Survive an Avalanche" or "How to Live on Bugs in the Jungle.” Huh?! You know who really needs a survival guide? Black and brown Americans. For surviving their own damn country! Minority populations wake up every day in a battle for their health and safety. Thankfully, legendary activist-comedian D.L. Hughley offers How to Survive America, a fearless satire that exposes racism’s unjust toll on our bodies and minds. Even before COVID-19 disproportionately impacted minority communities, life expectancy for Blacks was a full three years less than for white Americans. The very air we breathe is more polluted, our water is more contaminated, our local food options are toxic, and our jobs are underpaid. Despite the obvious need, the quality of our health care is tragically inadequate. Our communities are statistically less safe than the average, and yet we’re terrorized by the law-enforcement and criminal-justice systems that are supposed to protect us, sending Blacks to prison at five times the rate of whites. Not least, our means of addressing these injustices—voting—is perennially under assault. It’s enough to drive you crazy. Well, guess what? According to Cigna, Blacks are 20 percent more likely to report “psychological distress” yet “50 percent less likely to receive counseling or mental health treatment.” It’s almost like the entire country has been structured with no regard for our welfare. Hmmm. Whether you’re Black, white, brown, or Asian, don’t leave home without arming yourself with How to Survive America!