Insults & Comebacks


Book Description

The 'Lines For All Occasions' series provides a superb collection of these much needed phrases for all manner of breakup, rejection, excuse, lie, come-on, or insult situations - ranging from the diplomatic to the downright bridge burning.




1001 Insults, Put-Downs, & Comebacks


Book Description

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”—Groucho Marx An insult can be offensive and infuriating, but it means nothing if you have a better comeback. 1001 Insults, Put-Downs, and Comebacks gathers together the very sharpest of these barbs from a wide variety of sources, with some of the wickedest put-downs from the literary, political, and entertainment worlds, along with many others.




Yo' Mama Is So...


Book Description

It's everyone's favorite form of insult comedy (as seen on MTV!) -- hundreds of crushingly funny one-liners about "yo' mama" -- and all yo' other relatives -- sure to shut people's mouths or make them howl with laughter. Yo' mama is so fat, when her beeper goes off, people think she's backing up. Yo' mama is so old that when she was young, rainbows were black and white. Yo' mama is so fat, she eats Wheat Thicks. Yo' mama is so dumb that when she saw a sign that said, "Airport Left," she turned around and went home. Yo' mama's so short you can see her feet on her driver's license. So dumb, so fat, so ugly, and so old have never been SO FUNNY, thanks to this exhaustive and inventive assortment of laugh-out-loud one-line jokes sure to cause a sensation. Hundreds of quotable and easy-to-remember quips have been gathered here by a comedy master, and the result is a relentless collection of wholesome, all-in-good-fun nastiness for every occasion. Divided into handy categories (in case you happen to need a boatload of fat jokes, skinny jokes, or whatever) Yo' Mama Is So . . . is an essential addition to the humor shelf of any self-respecting smart aleck. Hey . . . what did you call my mama??!!




The Snark Handbook: Insult Edition


Book Description

The beloved "Snark Handbook" is back in a new edition--making readers smarterand, more importantly, better than everyone else.




WITTY COMEBACKS


Book Description




The Unofficial Harry Potter Insults Handbook


Book Description

WELCOME TO THE NEW FULL-COLOR EDITION! We are pleased to inform you that in October 2017 this book was magically refreshed and improved. Please find enclosed a list of all second-edition updates: full-color illustrations, additional pages including "Tricks and Treats for Magical Bullies," and wicked new insults! Got a belligerent bully on your back? Next time your paths cross, say "Every time I see a Dementor, I'm forced to relive our every encounter." Whether you're a N.E.W.T.-level wizard or a wide-eyed witch still awaiting your Hogwarts acceptance letter, you've probably encountered a merciless Malfoy or despicable Dursley who makes your magical blood boil. If you've ever stood speechless as someone called you a talentless squib, a worthless git or a filthy mudblood, The Unofficial Harry Potter Insults Handbook: 101 Comebacks For The Wicked Wizards And Witches In Your Life is the book for you! NOTE: This is a picture book intended for any Harry Potter fan but geared toward younger audiences. This book is NOT affiliated in any way with any other official or unofficial Harry Potter book.




The Giant Book of Insults


Book Description

A lively collection of sharp retorts and ripostes, pithy pot, ricocheting bombast - caustic quips, and polite, and the definitely unpolite, sort of put downs. This book can either be read for the sheer fiendish fun of it, or it can be put to work as a sourcebook for anyboday - speakers, entertainers, managers, writers - who wishes to communicate a little more forcefully. Carefully categorised according to targets, this book can be used time and time again to deflate egotists, dispose of bores and demolish dummies.




Insults Every Man Should Know


Book Description

A pocket-sized gift book guide to the best hard-hitting insults for every occasion. This handy little book is packed with insulting gestures, backhanded compliments, comebacks, all the things you should never say about someone's mama, and much more! Including: • Insulting Someone’s Intelligence • Insulting Someone’s Sexual Prowess • Insults for the Office • Insults on Game Day • Insults throughout History • Insults from around the World




Perfect Comebacks


Book Description

Craft the ultimate comeback in seconds flat with Perfect Insults, your clean guide to all things insulting. Craft the ultimate comeback in seconds flat with Perfect Insults, your clean guide to all things insulting. Drag your enemies with eloquence with insults like the classic “Son of a Nutcracker” to the masterful “You’d struggle to pour water out of a book with instructions on the heel.” Learn the art of insulting your adversaries without a single curse word with hundreds of premade comebacks at the turn of a page, so you’ll never find yourself rehearsing what you should have said later. Packed with humorous, clean insults for all ages, this book is sure to be a hit!




The Official Guide to Cut-Downs and Comebacks: Words Edition


Book Description

Have you ever been in a situation where you needed to defend yourself, or others, but just didn't have the right words to do so? Of course, a few hours later, when you replay the situation in your mind, the perfect response comes to you. "If I had only said that I would've been a hero!" Yes, we've all been there, and it's a helpless feeling because you know that the moment has passed for good. For all intents and purposes, you lost. In this book, you'll get a full breakdown of the ways to come right back to those individuals who are attempting to cut you down. You'll discover clever ways to instantly dominate any situation where another person is trying to insult you or your friends. You'll quickly become a master of the craft and be able to call upon these comebacks, or come up with your own using this proven formula, at any time. No more regrets, no more shoulda-coulda-wouldas. No more losing. Consider this comeback system as your compass that allows you to navigate the rough terrain we call social class and order. I wrote this book because you needed support from someone who has been there before. Know that I have a personal stake in this and have tapped back into my own childhood and current everyday life to try and understand both sides of this natural phenomenon. The defenseless need defending. The common person needs armor and weapons when it is their time to attack. You are my inspiration for this. Here's how it works: At the top of the page there will be a cut-down, directly below will be a brief insight into the cut-down, and at the bottom, there will be several different comebacks to the cut-down. The following pages will change your life for the better. The time for lying down is over. The time has come for a shift in power. It's time for a new hero-story to be written. Is it your time? Will you be that hero? It is yours for the taking if you are ready. Are you ready?