It's The Freaking Apocalypse And This Is My New Boyfriend


Book Description

Some helpful rules to stay alive during an apocalypse: 1. Keep your socks dry. 2. Don't eat expired tuna. Seriously. 3. Grab the baddest scariest guy you see and don't let go. 4. Do whatever he says (you might just like it). 5. Don't fall in love. They say romance died when society collapsed. They were right. It's brutal out here. My last date had no teeth. He took me to the Great Tire Fire and roasted a rat on a stick. I was convinced I was going to die alone at the tender old age of twenty-two until I saw Max. He was wearing a freaking skull on his head. It was terror at first sight. But like bacteria on wet socks, Max will grow on you. And this obsessive alpha might just give me the best happy ending you can get in this nightmarish hellscape. The Ravagers were formed to kill all the zombies. Now that the zombies are long gone, who's left to take out the Ravagers? They're cruel, barbaric men who raid and steal from the ordinary people trying to make a life after the carnage. When Marley gets stolen on a raid, she's expecting the worst, but she gets the best-she gets Max. Insta-love at its finest in a SAFE read with no cheating and a HEA guaranteed. Enjoy!




Taken by the Hunter


Book Description

CONNIE I have a purple stalker. I don't know what possessed me to hit the Xarc'n warrior with my bat, but now I have a stalker--a big purple stalker with fangs and horns. And to make things worse, I can't go back to New Franklin. After my first night out on my own, I wake up all wrapped up and cuddly with a certain possessive hunter. He purrs like a giant cat and vows to protect me. And to top it all off, he has a pet squirrel. A freakin' pet squirrel! The "Jerk" claims he can't let go of me, but I don't buy it. I'm no squirrel, and I don't intend to be his pet. Not even when he claims I belong with him and promises to protect me forever. JORG'K Killing the scourge is my calling, and I revel in every violent encounter. Hunters are created with strong instincts to protect, but mine never fully manifested. I just wanted to fight. I never understood why some hunters wanted anything more. Until now. I can't get the little human out of my head. She attacks me with her wooden club, and I realize she's all I ever wanted. My brave female watches me as I fight the deadly scourge, so I give her a show of my strength and skills. I will convince her to be my mate. I have to. The mating bond has chosen, and it is never wrong!




Hyperbole and a Half


Book Description

#1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!




The Remaining


Book Description

The first volume in D.J. Molles's bestselling series, now in a special edition with the bonus novella The Remaining: Faith. In a steel-and-lead encased bunker a Special Forces soldier waits on his final orders. On the surface a bacterium has turned 90% of the population into hyper-aggressive predators. Now Captain Lee Harden must leave the bunker and venture into the wasteland to rekindle a shattered America.




The Knife of Never Letting Go


Book Description

A dystopian thriller follows a boy and girl on the run from a town where all thoughts can be heard – and the passage to manhood embodies a horrible secret. Todd Hewitt is the only boy in a town of men. Ever since the settlers were infected with the Noise germ, Todd can hear everything the men think, and they hear everything he thinks. Todd is just a month away from becoming a man, but in the midst of the cacophony, he knows that the town is hiding something from him -- something so awful Todd is forced to flee with only his dog, whose simple, loyal voice he hears too. With hostile men from the town in pursuit, the two stumble upon a strange and eerily silent creature: a girl. Who is she? Why wasn't she killed by the germ like all the females on New World? Propelled by Todd's gritty narration, readers are in for a white-knuckle journey in which a boy on the cusp of manhood must unlearn everything he knows in order to figure out who he truly is.




Ashen Winter


Book Description

It's been over six months since the eruption of the Yellowstone supervolcano. Alex and Darla have been staying with Alex’s relatives, trying to cope with the new reality of the primitive world so vividly portrayed in Ashfall, the first book in this series. It's also been six months of waiting for Alex's parents to return from Iowa. Alex and Darla decide they can wait no longer and must retrace their journey into Iowa to find and bring back Alex's parents to the tenuous safety of Illinois. But the landscape they cross is even more perilous than before, with life-and-death battles for food and power between the remaining communities. When the unthinkable happens, Alex must find new reserves of strength and determination to survive.




Love in the Time of the Apocalypse


Book Description

Though a dystopian novel hovering over the imminent collapse of American civilization at the hands of a techno-authoritarian state, "Love in the Time of the Apocalypse" is also a book about the triumph of love and humor over the fatal gravitas of life and death. It is part future nightmare part whimsical farce of the present. Love in the Time of the Apocalypse is a work of playful conspiritorial pop-delirium and pastiche full of lovable terrorists, state run breeding houses, Amish casinos, vulgar action scenes, the antichrist, tongue and cheek hyper-masculinity ("perhaps sit-ups can save the world") and a bourgeois love story to top it all. Readers who love Science Fiction, Dystopian Literature, and Conspiracy Theory will find this book chock full of fresh and clever fare. The speculative details are much more subtle than works on the post-apocalypse. The reader can feel both drawn into a bit of a future shock while at the same time remain anchored in a familiar, albeit, terrifying present. Blecha has a way of pulling from current trends of government suppression of freedoms and stretching them ever so softly to their possible conclusion. Thus, rather than a world of utter totalitarianism such at Orwell's 1984, we are presented with a more plausible, more friendly fascism that a society founded on consumerism and entertainment might bring about. Without coming across as a writer with an agenda, Gregory Blecha offers a strong but playful critique of State power, the smothering inefficiency and corruption of bureaucracy, and the role of the over-stimulated, under-critical herd of middle class consumers and middle managers of a collapsing North America. Tramps,plague victims, nihilists and nymphomaniacs along with the main character, a WASP drawn into their exciting world, make for the heroes of the story. The villains are the lifeless and systematic processes of the Federal Government, the Department of Health, the Department of Overpopulation, and the technological control systems of modern life, and yet even these are rendered with an air of playfulness that allows the reader to smile as the world comes crumbling down.




Romancing the Nerd


Book Description

Dan Garrett has become exactly what he hates—popular. Until recently, he was just another live-action role-playing nerd on the lowest rung of the social ladder. Cue a massive growth spurt and an uncanny skill at taking three-point shots in basketball and voilà...Mr. Popular. It's definitely weird. And the biggest drawback? Going from high school zero to basketball hero cost Dan the secret girl of his dorky dreams. A band geek with an eclectic fashion sense, Zelda Potts's “coolness” stat is about minus forty-two. Dan turning his back on her and the rest of nerd-dom was brutal enough, but when he humiliates her at school, Zelda decides it's time for a little revenge—dork style. Never mind that she used to have a crush on him. Never mind that her plan could backfire big time. It's time to roll the dice...and hope like freakin' hell she doesn't lose her heart in the process.




Wedding Belles


Book Description

The Sassy Belles are back…and this time, wedding bells are ringing! Seven months pregnant and head over heels in love, Vivi Ann McFadden is busy pulling together the final details for her wedding to Lewis Heart, famous play-by-play announcer for the Crimson Tide. But with two wedding-planners-gone-wild, a psychic giving her advice and the ceremony happening on the same day as the wildly popular Crimson Tide kickoff game, chaos reigns supreme. Luckily, maid of honor Blake O'Hara Heart is on the job. She'll tackle this wedding if it's the last thing she does! But not everyone is cheering for the happy couple. News of the upcoming nuptials has brought Lewis's old flame back to Tuscaloosa—and she's got a secret that could mean the end of Lewis's marriage…before it even begins. Sexy Southern fun…with a hint of magnolia!




Crazies


Book Description

Its the last week of summer vacation for Caleb. He has chosen to spend it at his family camp in the deep mountains of southern Vermont. His friends should be arriving soon. However, after a morning hike, he returns to find the answering machine filled up with frantic messages about the dead coming alive...just on the other side of the mountain! Seemingly at the safest place possible, his friends arrive and start preparing for the worst. And the worst happens. A single staggering figure arrives in the 20 acre field that the camp sits in. From this point forward, it turns into a living nightmare. An adventure through the woods, an abandoned hotel, and at every turn, a Crazy!