Primal Loss


Book Description

Seventy now-adult children of divorce give their candid and often heart-wrenching answers to eight questions (arranged in eight chapters, by question), including: What were the main effects of your parents' divorce on your life? What do you say to those who claim that "children are resilient" and "children are happy when their parents are happy"? What would you like to tell your parents then and now? What do you want adults in our culture to know about divorce? What role has your faith played in your healing? Their simple and poignant responses are difficult to read and yet not without hope. Most of the contributors--women and men, young and old, single and married--have never spoken of the pain and consequences of their parents' divorce until now. They have often never been asked, and they believe that no one really wants to know. Despite vastly different circumstances and details, the similarities in their testimonies are striking; as the reader will discover, the death of a child's family impacts the human heart in universal ways.




The Life-Saving Divorce


Book Description

You Can Love God and Still Get a Divorce. And get this, God will still love you. Really. Are you in a destructive marriage? One of emotional, physical, or verbal abuse? Infidelity? Neglect? If yes, you know you need to escape, but you're probably worried about going against God's will. I have good news for you. You might need to divorce to save your life and sanity. And God is right beside you. In "The Life-Saving Divorce" You'll Learn: - How to know if you should stay or if you should go.- The four key Bible verses that support divorce for infidelity, neglect, and physical and/or emotional abuse. - Twenty-seven myths about divorce that aren't true for many Christians. - Why a divorce is likely the absolute best thing for your children. - How to deal with friends and family who disapprove of divorce. - How to find safe friends and churches after a divorce. Can you find happiness after leaving your destructive marriage? Absolutely yes! You can get your life back and flourish more than you thought possible. Are you ready? Then let's go. It's time to be free. This book includes multiple first-person interviews. Explains psychological abuse, gaslighting, the abuse cycle, Christian divorce and remarriage, children and divorce, domestic violence, parental alienation, mental abuse, and biblical reasons for divorce. Includes diagrams such as the Duluth Wheel of Power and Control (the Duluth Model) and the Abuse Cycle, as well as graphs based on Paul Amato's 2003 study analyzing Judith Wallerstein's book, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce. Includes quotes by Leslie Vernick, Lundy Bancroft, Shannon Thomas, David Instone-Brewer, Natalie Hoffman, LifeWay Research, Kathleen Reay, Gottman Institute, Glenda Riley, Martin Luther, John Calvin, Steven Stosny, Michal Gilad, Leonie Westenberg, Nancy Nason-Clark, Julie Owens, Marg Mowczko, Justin Holcomb, Barna Group, Justin Lehmiller, Alan Hawkins, Brian Willoughby, William Doherty, Brad Wright, Bradford Wilcox, Sheila Gregoire, E Mavis Hetherington, John Kelly, Betsey Stevenson, Justin Wolfers, Norm Wright, Virginia Rutter, Judith Herman, and Bessel van der Kolk. Recommended reading list includes: Henry Cloud, John Townsend Boundaries books, Richard Warshack books.




Splitopia


Book Description

Packed with research, insights, and illuminating (and often funny) examples from Paris’s own divorce experience, this book is a “practical and reassuring guide to parting well.” —Gretchen Rubin, author of The Happiness Project Engaging and revolutionary, filled with wit, searing honesty, and intimate interviews, Splitopia is a call for a saner, more civil kind of divorce. As Paris reveals, divorce has improved dramatically in recent decades due to changes in laws and family structures, advances in psychology and child development, and a new understanding of the importance of the father. Positive psychology expert and author of Happier, Tal Ben-Shahar, writes that Paris’s “personal insights, stories, and research” create “a smart and interesting guide that can be extremely helpful for those going through divorce.” Reading this book can be the difference between an expensive, ugly battle and a decent divorce, between children sucked under by conflict or happy, healthy kids. This is “a compelling case that it’s high time for a new definition of Happily Ever After—for everyone” (Brigid Schulte, author of Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time).




The Parent's Guide to Birdnesting


Book Description

Take coparenting to the next level and provide a stable environment for your children as you and your spouse begin tackling your separation or divorce. For parents who are separating and want to put their children first, birdnesting could be the interim custody solution you’ve been looking for. Instead of the children splitting their time being shuttled between mom and dad’s separate homes, birdnesting allows the children to stay in the “nest” and instead, requires mom and dad to swap, allowing each parent to stay elsewhere when not with the children. Initially popularized by celebrities, this method of coparenting is now becoming more mainstream as a way to help ease children into a new family dynamic. Birdnesting takes work and commitment but with Dr. Ann Gold Buscho’s guidance, you’ll learn everything you need to know about this revolutionary method. In The Parent’s Guide to Birdnesting, you will discover the pros and cons, the financial and interpersonal considerations, and if it’s the right decision for you and your family.




Divorce Busting


Book Description

A step-by-step approach to making your marriage loving again.




The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce


Book Description

Divorce is at once a widespread reality and a painful decision, so it is no surprise that this landmark study of its long-term effects should both spark debate and find a large audience. In this compelling, thought-provoking book, Judith Wallerstein explains that, while children do learn to cope with divorce, it in fact takes its greatest toll in adulthood, when the sons and daughters of divorced parents embark on romantic relationships of their own. Wallerstein sensitively illustrates how children of divorce often feel that their relationships are doomed, seek to avoid conflict, and fear commitment. Failure in their loving relationships often seems to them preordained, even when things are going smoothly. As Wallerstein checks in on the adults she first encountered as youngsters more than twenty-five years ago, she finds that their experiences mesh with those of the millions of other children of divorce, who will find themselves on every page. With more than 100,000 copies in print, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce spent three weeks on the New York Times, San Francisco Chronicle, and Denver Post bestseller lists. The book was also featured on two episodes of Oprah as well as on the front cover of Time and the New York Times Book Review.




Your Child's Divorce


Book Description

When an adult child's marriage ends, lots of folks are hurt. The divorcing couple, of course, and their children. Until now, however, little attention has been paid to the parents of the divorcees. Temlock's examination of this sensitive topic offers parents a friendly guidebook packed with helpful information and suggestions from parents who've "been there." Her five-stage model of the divorce process for parents (Accepting the News, Rescuing Your Child, Responding to Changes, Stabilizing the Family, Refocusing and Rebuilding) will help readers stay grounded through the emotional upheavals they'll share with their children and grandchildren. This practical manual puts an arm around the shoulder of parents of divorcing adults and supports them through the difficult days of the divorce process and its aftermath.




Learning From Divorce


Book Description

Learning from Divorce, by Christine A. Coates and E. Robert LaCrosse, is a practical book that will help you rid yourself of negative feelings of guilt and worry and replace them with positive feelings of growth and hope. Learning from Divorce will show you how to confront your fears and flaws, motivate you to move forward toward change, develop realistic hopes about succeeding with future relationships, and turn your failures into victories! In this groundbreaking book the authors explain that divorce can be viewed as a developmental process, a period of transformation and growth. They help the reader understand why the divorce happened in the first place— how unrealistic expectations of a permanent honeymoon or a partner who would satisfy their infantile needs and solve all their childhood problems have so often led to immature and self-centered behavior. In place of this attitude, Learning from Divorce provides the reader with a more realistic view of marriage as a long-term commitment requiring loyalty, compromise, devotion, perseverance, and selflessness. This book shows that the rewards of love and family exceed most any other joy or aspiration in one's life and will help you.




Not Too Old for That


Book Description

Helps women break through the tired and hurtful stereotypes of aging to better reflect who they are, how they live, and what they want as they age. Who hasn’t heard the stereotypes about women of a "certain age?” That’s the age when women become invisible, irrelevant, undesirable, asexual, unhinged, dried-up, hormonal messes. It’s when women quickly slide into fragility and become forgetful, passive, weak, feeble, debilitated, disabled, dependent, and depressed. Or so the story goes. Not only are those outdated narratives sexist and ageist, they are also damaging to women’s physical, emotional, financial, romantic, and sexual health. It’s time to change them. In Not Too Old for That, Vicki Larson helps change the narrative about being a woman at midlife and older. She questions what we’ve been told aging would be like and encourages us to instead ask ourselves, what do we want it to be like, and how can we get there? The key is to be curious, open-minded, and intentional about the ways we are becoming our future selves.We have an opportunity to create new narratives of aging as a woman, ones that value women at all stages of life, not just youth, and it starts with us. Once the stereotypes that have held women back are broken down, women can move past them and rather than feel helpless as the years add up, they can discover and tap into just how much agency they have. Not only will this book help to create a less-ageist, less-sexist, more-inclusive future, it will release our daughters and all young women from a similar future.




I Don't Want a Divorce


Book Description

What could be good about a bad marriage? The good news is, you can get beyond that old marriage and its destructive habits, and build a brand-new one with the same spouse. And you can do it in just 90 days, even if only one spouse is committed to change. Thousands of couples in marriages that are on the brink will never enter a therapist's office, and for others it's too late by the time they do agree to come. But for more than 20 years, David Clarke has seen marriages turn around in just 12 weeks. Here he takes his 90-day plan and presents it using humor, Scripture, and personal stories to help couples turn difficult marriages into great ones. Whether the issue is communication, the kids, negative attitudes, or even serious sin, Clarke's personalized approach will put readers on the road to a great marriage.