Some Very Interesting Cats Perhaps You Weren't Aware Of


Book Description

A completely original and funny new take on cats. Doogie Horner, a writer and illustrator, knows just what it is about cats that so obsesses and delights us—their impenetrable personalities, their self-contained quirkiness, the aura of mystery that makes it seem as if they’re always up to something that they don’t want us to know about. So he imagines their secret lives for us, in a way that takes the most surprising and whimsical turns. With full-color illustrations and absurdly funny short stories, Some Very Interesting Cats Perhaps You Weren’t Aware Of is a gallery of 100 impossible cat characters. Like the Alien cat, Xort, who reports back to his planet: “Have trained my humans to feed and pet me. They suspect nothing.” Or the Mountain Climber cat, Snowball, who is planning a perilous route up the North Curtain to Mt. Bookcase. Or Mystico, the Magician cat—no one could figure out how he sawed a dog in half. (The answer was simple: He didn’t like dogs.) And Hjalmar, the Viking cat, whose motto is “Pillage. Tuna. Plunder. Nap.”




Some Very Interesting Cats Perhaps You Weren't Aware Of


Book Description

A completely original and funny new take on cats. Doogie Horner, a writer and illustrator, knows just what it is about cats that so obsesses and delights us—their impenetrable personalities, their self-contained quirkiness, the aura of mystery that makes it seem as if they’re always up to something that they don’t want us to know about. So he imagines their secret lives for us, in a way that takes the most surprising and whimsical turns. With full-color illustrations and absurdly funny short stories, Some Very Interesting Cats Perhaps You Weren’t Aware Of is a gallery of 100 impossible cat characters. Like the Alien cat, Xort, who reports back to his planet: “Have trained my humans to feed and pet me. They suspect nothing.” Or the Mountain Climber cat, Snowball, who is planning a perilous route up the North Curtain to Mt. Bookcase. Or Mystico, the Magician cat—no one could figure out how he sawed a dog in half. (The answer was simple: He didn’t like dogs.) And Hjalmar, the Viking cat, whose motto is “Pillage. Tuna. Plunder. Nap.”




This Might Hurt a Bit


Book Description

“Full of wit and wisdom, and riotously funny to boot. A phenomenal debut!” —Ransom Riggs, New York Times bestselling author of Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children “As irreverent as it is gratifying.” —David Arnold, New York Times bestselling author of Kids of Appetite and Mosquitoland A grieving teen faces dangerous classmates, reckless friends, and the one-year anniversary of his sister’s devastating death in this poignant, quirky, often humorous novel that’s perfect for fans of Jeff Zentner and Brendan Kiely. Kirby Burns is about to have the second worst day of his life. Tomorrow is the one-year anniversary of the worst day of his life, and in the three hundred and sixty-four days since then he hasn’t stopped running: from his family, his memories, and the horse-sized farm dogs that chase him to the bus stop every morning. But he can’t run forever, and Kirby and his friends PJ and Jake sneak out of his house to play a prank with consequences that follow them to school the next day, causing a chain reaction of mayhem and disaster. It’s a story that’s touching and funny, an authentic meditation on the pain of loss, and the challenge of getting paint to stick to cows.




A Die Hard Christmas


Book Description

A delightful Christmas storybook for adults based on the action-packed Die Hard movie All John McClane wants for Christmas is to reunite with his estranged family. But when his wife’s office holiday party turns into a deadly hostage situation, he has to save her life before he can get home in time for Christmas! The unconventional fan-favorite movie Die Hard is now an illustrated storybook—complete with machine guns, European terrorists, and a cop who’s forced to rely on all his cunning and skills (and the help of a fellow officer) to save the day. Based on the classic “Night Before Christmas” poem and filled with whimsical illustrations, this cleverly reimagined homage is destined to become a holiday classic. *Contains adult material including violence and strong language. Reader discretion is advised. Ho-ho-ho.




This Might Hurt a Bit


Book Description

“Full of wit and wisdom, and riotously funny to boot. A phenomenal debut!” —Ransom Riggs, New York Times bestselling author of Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children “As irreverent as it is gratifying.” —David Arnold, New York Times bestselling author of Kids of Appetite and Mosquitoland A grieving teen faces dangerous classmates, reckless friends, and the one-year anniversary of his sister’s devastating death in this poignant, quirky, often humorous novel that’s perfect for fans of Jeff Zentner and Brendan Kiely. Kirby Burns is about to have the second worst day of his life. Tomorrow is the one-year anniversary of the worst day of his life, and in the three hundred and sixty-four days since then he hasn’t stopped running: from his family, his memories, and the horse-sized farm dogs that chase him to the bus stop every morning. But he can’t run forever, and Kirby and his friends PJ and Jake sneak out of his house to play a prank with consequences that follow them to school the next day, causing a chain reaction of mayhem and disaster. It’s a story that’s touching and funny, an authentic meditation on the pain of loss, and the challenge of getting paint to stick to cows.




The Adventures of Invisible Boy


Book Description

In this hilarious debut middle grade graphic novel, when an impossible wish comes true, a wild adventure begins! "Can't be missed!" —Max Brallier, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Last Kids on Earth Think your wildest wish can’t come true? Just wait! It’s his first day at a new school, and Stanley wishes he could disappear. He can hardly believe it when, after a big spill at the science fair, POOF! Stanley is invisible! It’s awesome! He can do anything he wants, and no one will know! But Stanley isn’t the only one who turned invisible. The inventor of the potion is not happy about the accident and takes his anger out on kids all over town. Stanley wants to use his power for good . . . which means going up against the one person who can make him visible again. Get ready for a battle of the ages.




The Sense of an Ending


Book Description

BOOKER PRIZE WINNER • NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A novel that follows a middle-aged man as he contends with a past he never much thought about—until his closest childhood friends return with a vengeance: one of them from the grave, another maddeningly present. A novel so compelling that it begs to be read in a single setting, The Sense of an Ending has the psychological and emotional depth and sophistication of Henry James at his best, and is a stunning achievement in Julian Barnes's oeuvre. Tony Webster thought he left his past behind as he built a life for himself, and his career has provided him with a secure retirement and an amicable relationship with his ex-wife and daughter, who now has a family of her own. But when he is presented with a mysterious legacy, he is forced to revise his estimation of his own nature and place in the world.




The Last Lecture


Book Description

The author, a computer science professor diagnosed with terminal cancer, explores his life, the lessons that he has learned, how he has worked to achieve his childhood dreams, and the effect of his diagnosis on him and his family.




Dirty Jokes Every Man Should Know


Book Description

The ultimate collection of racy, ribald, and downright hilarious humor that makes a great gift! This pocket-sized compendium of the crude and coarse contains all the jokes a man needs to crack wise. From the suggestive to the salacious, this book compiles the greatest dirty jokes of all time, including: • The One about the Factory Worker Who Made Love with a Pickle Slicer • The One about the Flea, the Flight Attendant, and the Airplane Restroom • The One about Father O’Mally’s Sunday Night Bath • The One about the Cowboy and the Lesbian




Cat Sense


Book Description

Cats have been popular household pets for thousands of years, and their numbers only continue to rise. Today there are three cats for every dog on the planet, and yet cats remain more mysterious, even to their most adoring owners. Unlike dogs, cats evolved as solitary hunters, and, while many have learned to live alongside humans and even feel affection for us, they still don’t quite “get us” the way dogs do, and perhaps they never will. But cats have rich emotional lives that we need to respect and understand if they are to thrive in our company. In Cat Sense, renowned anthrozoologist John Bradshaw takes us further into the mind of the domestic cat than ever before, using cutting-edge scientific research to dispel the myths and explain the true nature of our feline friends. Tracing the cat’s evolution from lone predator to domesticated companion, Bradshaw shows that although cats and humans have been living together for at least eight thousand years, cats remain independent, predatory, and wary of contact with their own kind, qualities that often clash with our modern lifestyles. Cats still have three out of four paws firmly planted in the wild, and within only a few generations can easily revert back to the independent way of life that was the exclusive preserve of their predecessors some 10,000 years ago. Cats are astonishingly flexible, and given the right environment they can adapt to a life of domesticity with their owners—but to continue do so, they will increasingly need our help. If we’re to live in harmony with our cats, Bradshaw explains, we first need to understand their inherited quirks: understanding their body language, keeping their environments—however small—sufficiently interesting, and becoming more proactive in managing both their natural hunting instincts and their relationships with other cats. A must-read for any cat lover, Cat Sense offers humane, penetrating insights about the domestic cat that challenge our most basic assumptions and promise to dramatically improve our pets’ lives—and ours.