The Dynamics of Infidelity


Book Description

This book employs research in social, personality, and evolutionary psychology to explain and offer treatment approaches for individuals and couples suffering from infidelity.




Handbook of the Clinical Treatment of Infidelity


Book Description

Help your clients’ relationships survive infidelity! In the Handbook of the Clinical Treatment of Infidelity, a panel of seasoned experts reflects on issues central to affairs, and on how to help couples heal and learn from them. First, editors Fred P. Piercy, Katherine M. Hertlein, and Joseph L. Wetchler provide an essential overview of infidelity theory, research, and treatment. They discuss the effect of infidelity on couples and delineate three types of infidelity—emotional, physical, and infidelity including aspects of both. They review the relatively new role of the Internet in infidelity and explore infidelity within the context of comarital relationships. Finally, they discuss the overarching theories and common models used in infidelity treatment. Also in the Handbook of the Clinical Treatment of Infidelity: Susan M. Johnson, the co-developer of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), discusses affairs through the lens of attachment theory, and shows how EFT provides a way to acknowledge and express pain, remorse, and regret, and to repair this attachment bond. David Moultrup takes a Bowenian approach to infidelity, focusing attention on the underlying dynamics of the emotional system Frank Pittman and Tina Pittman Wagers outline cultural myths about affairs and do their share of debunking Adrian Blow discusses how to help couples directly address their pain—and the challenges of the healing process Brian Case highlights the role of apology and forgiveness in the healing process Frank Stalfa and Catherine Hastings focus on the treatment of “accusatory suffering”—a spouse’s obsessive holding onto and retaliating for an affair long after it has ended, and despite the offending partner’s repeated apologies and attempts at restitution Don-David Lusterman discusses individuals who have suppressed or denied traumatic stress reactions to their partner’s affair, and how to help them Scott Johnson discusses myths about affairs, from who is cheating on whom, to whether men really have more affairs than women, to the blame-filled language of “affairs,” “betrayal,” and “infidelity,” asking us to think more systematically about affairs and to see the dynamics of extra dyadic relationships as more complex and nuanced than they are typically portrayed in the literature Joan Atwood provides an overview of Internet infidelity—the factors influencing one’s involvement in this type of infidelity, and some considerations for therapists Tim Nelson, Fred Piercy, and Doug Sprenkle report on the results of a multi-phase Delphi study that explored what infidelity experts say are the critical issues, interventions, and gender differences in the treatment of Internet infidelity Monica Whitty and Adrian Carr draw upon Klein’s object relations theory and discuss how this might influence the way people rationalize their Internet infidelity Emily Brown outlines the concept of the Split Self Affair—discussing its origins, characteristics, and implications for individuals and couples, and providing detailed information on how to work with these couples in therapy Michael Bettinger presents extra dyadic relationship as a fact, rather than a problem, within many gay male relationships—a discussion that shows how gay male polyamory can work as an alternative to the heterosexual model of emotional and sexual exclusivity in romantic dyadic relationships Katherine Hertlein and Gary Skaggs report on the results of a study that assessed the level of differentiation and one’s engagement in extra dyadic relationships The Handbook of the Clinical Treatment of Infidelity is essential reading for today’s (and tomorrow’s) clinicians who work with couples. Make it a p




NOT "Just Friends"


Book Description

One of the world’s leading experts on infidelity provides a step-by-step guide through the process of infidelity—from suspicion and revelation to healing, and provides profound, practical guidance to prevent infidelity and, if it happens, recover and heal from it. You’re right to be cautious when you hear these words: “I’m telling you, we’re just friends.” Good people in good marriages are having affairs. The workplace and the Internet have become fertile breeding grounds for “friendships” that can slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. Yet you can protect your relationship from emotional or sexual betrayal by recognizing the red flags that mark the stages of slipping into an improper, dangerous intimacy that can threaten your marriage.




The Secrets of Surviving Infidelity


Book Description

Advocates against ending a relationship due to cheating, teaching both victims and perpetrators of infidelity how to deal with their feelings, reduce their sense of despair, and begin rebuilding a strong relationship.




Patterns Of Infidelity And Their Treatment


Book Description

The new edition of this highly-regarded book includes comprehensive discussion of the nature of an affair and the five types of affairs and their underlying dynamics. The author addresses issues regarding revealing the affair, management of the consequences, rebuilding, and treating an unmarried third party, as well as the host of complex issues regarding children and custody arrangements. New material for the second edition includes cybersex and the effects of new technology on fidelity in marriage; the effects of managed care on treatment; marriage to the third party; and a new chapter on affairs and violence.




The State of Affairs


Book Description

"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”




Private Lies


Book Description

Infidelity is the most common major crisis of marriage. In this wise book, a psychiatrist and family therapist discusses four kinds of infidelity, why they happen, and what they mean.




Infidelity


Book Description

This second edition brings together an impressive array of experts to discuss and provide understanding to the treatment of infidelity. Bringing together voices from a range of disciplines and backgrounds, including couples therapy, family therapy, evolutionary psychology, relational research, and more, Peluso and Irvine help therapists understand and practically treat this common and complex issue. Divided into three parts, chapters begin by laying the foundations for understanding why couples commit infidelity before looking at different treatments, such as Gottman Method Couples Therapy, models of fidelity and forgiveness, and other integrative approaches. This new edition includes brand-new material on topics such as nonmonogamy, teletherapy, cyber-infidelity, and the impact of infidelity on couples and families from different social, cultural, generational, and sexual perspectives. With revised referrals and resources at the end of each chapter; additional infidelity treatment methods; and examinations of gender, race, and power, this guide is essential reading for all practicing and training marriage and family therapists, counselors, psychotherapists, and social workers.




Patterns of Infidelity and Their Treatment


Book Description

An age-old problem, infidelity is increasingly being discussed as part of public dialogue. This book includes discussion of the nature of an affair and the five types of affairs and their underlying dynamics. Topics covered include cybersex; marriage to the third party; and affairs and violence.




Affairs


Book Description

A deeply traumatic experience for both spouses, an affair can create a terrible loss of trust and can often lead to the end of a relationship. There are consequences not only for the married couple, but also for their children, family, and friends, not to mention for the third party in the triangle. This non-judgmental guide offers the knowledge and information that couples need in order to adequately confront marital infidelity and to get on with their lives.