The Essex Joke Book


Book Description

WARNING: This book contains laugh-out-loud jokes about fake tans, vajazzles and all fings Essex Forget the Rolex or the flash car, what you really need in your life to make your friends well jel is The Essex Joke Book. It’s packed full of bling-tastic banter, racy rib-ticklers and gob-smackingly good gags all about Essex Girls and Boys, their tans and tribulations, conquests and cock-ups, and more. How can you tell an Essex Girl has been using her iPad? There’s Tipp-Ex on the screen. What do you call the skeleton of an Essex Boy in a wardrobe? Last year’s hide-and-seek champion. What goes blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette? An Essex Girl doing naked cartwheels. An Essex Girl gets a job as a teacher. She notices a boy in the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him. ‘You can go and play with the other kids, you know,’ she says. ‘It’s best I stay here,’ he says. ‘Why?’ asks the Essex Girl. The boy says: ‘Because I’m the f**king goalkeeper.’




Essex Girls


Book Description

'Not all Essex girls are party girls. They can be sages, martyrs, leaders. In her neat and provocative little book, Sarah Perry celebrates their courage and vivacity.' Hilary Mantel A defence and celebration of the Essex Girl by the best-selling author of The Essex Serpent Essex Girls are disreputable, disrespectful and disobedient. They speak out of turn, too loudly and too often, in an accent irritating to the ruling classes. Their bodies are hyper-sexualised and irredeemably vulgar. They are given to intricate and voluble squabbling. They do not apologise for any of this. And why should they? In this exhilarating feminist defence of the Essex girl, Sarah Perry re-examines her relationship with her much maligned home county. She summons its most unquiet spirits, from Protestant martyr Rose Allin to the indomitable Abolitionist Anne Knight, sitting them alongside Audre Lorde, Kim Kardashian and Harriet Martineau, and showing us that the Essex girl is not bound by geography. She is a type, representing a very particular kind of female agency, and a very particular kind of disdain: she contains a multitude of women, and it is time to celebrate them.




The Best Ever Book of Fencing Jokes


Book Description

If you've ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Irish, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Fencing jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Fencing Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The Best Ever Book of Fencing Jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one Fencing joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many Fencing jokes, you won't know where to start. For example: Why do Fencers wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An evil genie captured a Fencer and her two friends and banished them to the desert for a week. The genie allowed each person to bring one thing. The first friend brought a canteen so he wouldn't die of thirst. The second friend brought an umbrella to keep the sun off. The Fencer brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! *** Did you hear about the Fencer who wore two jackets when she painted the house? The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats." *** Why do Fencers laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it. ***




The JOKE


Book Description

All too often, this brilliant novel of thwarted love and revenge miscarried has been read for its political implications. Now, a quarter century after The Joke was first published and several years after the collapse of the Soviet-imposed Czechoslovak regime, it becomes easier to put such implications into perspective in favor of valuing the book (and all Kundera 's work) as what it truly is: great, stirring literature that sheds new light on the eternal themes of human existence. The present edition provides English-language readers an important further means toward revaluation of The Joke. For reasons he describes in his Author's Note, Milan Kundera devoted much time to creating (with the assistance of his American publisher-editor) a completely revised translation that reflects his original as closely as any translation possibly can: reflects it in its fidelity not only to the words and syntax but also to the characteristic dictions and tonalities of the novel's narrators. The result is nothing less than the restoration of a classic.




The Best Ever Book of Cyclist Jokes


Book Description

If you've ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Irish, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Cyclist jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Cyclist Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The Best Ever Book of Cyclist Jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one Cyclist joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many Cyclist jokes, you won't know where to start. For example: Why do Cyclists wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An evil genie captured a Cyclist and her two friends and banished them to the desert for a week. The genie allowed each person to bring one thing. The first friend brought a canteen so he wouldn't die of thirst. The second friend brought an umbrella to keep the sun off. The Cyclist brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! *** Did you hear about the Cyclist who wore two jackets when she painted the house? The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats." *** Why do Cyclists laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it. ***




Jokes and their Relations to Society


Book Description




100% Essex


Book Description

With anecdotes, jokes and quotes about Essex, as well as cheeky tricks and tips on how to act 100% Essex, this is the must-have handbook for all fans of the show and aspiring Essex girls and boys alike.




Engaging Humor


Book Description

Exploring the structure, motives, and meanings of humor in everyday life In Engaging Humor, Elliott Oring asks essential questions concerning humorous expression in contemporary society, examining how humor works, why it is employed, and what its messages might be. This provocative book is filled with examples of jokes and riddles that reveal humor to be a meaningful--even significant--form of expression. Oring scrutinizes classic Jewish jokes, frontier humor, racist cartoons, blonde jokes, and Internet humor. He provides alternate ways of thinking about humorous expressions by examining their contexts--not just their contents. He also shows how the incongruity and absurdity essential to the production of laughter can serve serious communicative ends. Engaging Humor examines the thoughts that underlie jokes, the question of racist motivation in ethnic humor, and the use of humor as a commentary on social interaction. The book also explores the relationship between humor and sentimentality and the role of humor in forging national identity. Engaging Humor demonstrates that when analyzed contextually and comparatively, humorous expressions emerge as communications that are startling, intriguing, and profound.




After Me Comes the Flood


Book Description

From the internationally bestselling author of The Essex Serpent—soon to be an Apple TV+ Series “A beautiful, dream-like, unsettling narrative in which every word, like a small jewel, feels carefully chosen, considered and placed. Rarely do debut novels come as assured and impressive as this one.”—Sarah Waters, New York Times bestselling author of The Paying Guests Elegant, sinister and psychologically complex, After Me Comes the Flood is the haunting debut novel by Sarah Perry, the bestselling author of The Essex Serpent and Melmoth. One hot summer’s day, John Cole decides to shut his bookshop early, and possibly forever, and drives out of London to see his brother. When his car breaks down on an isolated road, he goes looking for help and finds a dilapidated house. As he approaches, a laughing woman he’s never seen before walks out, addresses him by name and explains she’s been waiting for him. Entering the home, John discovers an enigmatic clan of residents all of whom seem to know who he is, and also claim they have been awaiting his arrival. They seem to be waiting for something else, too—something final.... Written before Sarah Perry’s ascension to an internationally bestselling author, After Me Comes the Flood is a spectacular novel of obsession, conviction, and providence.




The Meaning of Life


Book Description

Not suitable for younger readers.