The Search for Autonomous Intimacy


Book Description

At the center of this book are the stories of three very different young women who share their experiences of sexual abuse in childhood and adolescence. Drawing on research from both clinical and developmental psychology, it explores the formation of a separate, yet social self, as well as the ways in which sexual abuse may disrupt that process. The young women's narratives become a lens through which to examine how their identities are linked to self and social constructions of gender, power, sex, and abuse.




Attachment, Intimacy, Autonomy


Book Description

Attachment theory is on the leading edge of a conceptual revolution. It offers a new paradigm that can synthesize into a more coherent whole the best ideas from psychoanalysis, cognitive science, and neurobiology. With its emphasis on relationships, attachment theory is determinedly humanistic, while retaining the scientific vigor of Darwinian ethnology. Attachment theory provides an overall framework for thinking about relationships, or more accurately, about those aspects of relationships that are shaped by threat and the need for security, themes that are central to the work of psychotherapy. In this book Jeremy Holmes explores the contribution of attachment theory to everyday psycho-therapeutic practice where patients are usually seen once weekly, or less, for no more than two to three years.




Deeper Dating


Book Description

With exercises, practical tools, and inspiring stories, Deeper Dating will guide you on a journey to find the love—and personal fulfillment—you long for Lose weight. Be confident. Keep your partner guessing. At the end of the day, this soulless approach to dating doesn't lead to love but to insecurity and desperation. In Deeper Dating, Ken Page presents a new path to love. Out of his decades of work as a psychotherapist and his own personal struggle to find love, Page teaches that the greatest magnet for real love lies in our "Core Gifts"—the places of our deepest sensitivity, longing, and passion. Deeper Dating guides us to discover our own Core Gifts and empowers us to express them with courage, generosity, and discrimination in our dating life. When we do this, something miraculous happens: we begin to attract people who love us for who we are, we become more self-assured and emotionally available, and we lose our taste for relationships that chip away at our self-esteem. Without losing a pound, changing our hairstyle, or buying a single new accessory, we find healthy love moving closer . . . Deeper Dating integrates the best of human intimacy theory with timeless spiritual truths and translates them into a practical, step-by-step process.




Intimate Autonomy


Book Description

This insightful new volume explores the many and varied aspects of the process of intimacy as it relates to autonomy in couples therapy. The nature of intimacy in relationships is explored from a variety of vantage points by experienced therapists with a wide range of backgrounds. This thought-provoking book will provide all therapists and mental health/counseling professionals with insight into the subject of intimacy and the problems involved in attaining access to the intimacy process in therapy with couples. Given that a large portion of the population of our culture suffers from various forms of intimacy disorder, Intimate Autonomy: Autonomous Intimacy brings a variety of viewpoints of utmost importance to all who are involved in couples therapy. In-depth coverage of various factors related to intimacy and autonomy is provided by this intriguing book. Some of the topics examined include the myth and reality of intimate autonomy in couples relationships, narcissistic vulnerability in marriage, the fear of loneliness as the basic and universal drive motivating intimacy, intimate autonomy as it relates to the Gestalt therapy concept of the "I-Thou" relationship, a comparison of transference in therapy to falling in love, the use of existential reflection with Vietnam veterans in marital therapy to increase meaning awareness, and a clinical guide to the use of a conceptualization of marital intimacy based on the idea of a matrix of four basic characteristics of intimacy. Mental health professionals, pastoral counsellors, clergy, and psychotherapists will find plenty of food-for-thought on the subject of intimacy and autonomy in couples relationships in this fascinating volume.




Love, Friendship, and the Self


Book Description

Recent Western thought has consistently emphasized the individualistic strand in our understanding of persons at the expense of the social strand. Thus, it is generally thought that persons are self-determining and autonomous, where these are understood to be capacities we exercise most fully on our own, apart from others, whose influence on us tends to undermine that autonomy. Love, Friendship, and the Self argues that we must reject a strongly individualistic conception of persons if we are to make sense of significant interpersonal relationships and the importance they can have in our lives. It presents a new account of love as intimate identification and of friendship as a kind of plural agency, in each case grounding and analyzing these notions in terms of interpersonal emotions. At the center of this account is an analysis of how our emotional connectedness with others is essential to our very capacities for autonomy and self-determination: we are rational and autonomous only because of and through our inherently social nature. By focusing on the role that relationships of love and friendship have both in the initial formation of our selves and in the on-going development and maturation of adult persons, Helm significantly alters our understanding of persons and the kind of psychology we persons have as moral and social beings.




The Search for the Secure Base


Book Description

In recent decades, attachment theory has gained widespread interest and acceptance, although the relevance of attachment theory to clinical practice has never been clear. The Search for the Secure Base shows how attachment theory can be used therapeutically. Jeremy Holmes introduces an exciting new attachment paradigm in psychotherapy with adults, describing the principles and practice of attachment-informed therapy in a way that will be useful to beginners and experienced therapists alike. Illustrated with a wide range of clinical examples, this book will be welcomed by practitioners and trainees in psychotherapy, psychoanalysis and in many other disciplines.




Intimacy and Desire


Book Description

In this groundbreaking book, Dr. David Schnarch, one of the foremost experts on sexuality and relationships, explains why normal healthy couples in long-term relationships have sexual desire problems, regardless of how much they love each other or how well they communicate. In-depth examples of couples he has counselled reveal his unique understanding of common-but-difficult sexual desire problems that affect couples of all ages. Combining compassion and clinical wisdom, Dr. Schnarch explains how to use his revolutionary Four Points of Balance approach to resolve low desire, mismatched desire, sexual boredom, and the emotional gridlock that accompanies these problems. Intimacy and Desire provides a roadmap for how couples can transform common sexual desire problems into self-exploration and personal development that leads to psychological and spiritual growth, stronger relationships, and more powerful and meaningful desire for each other. It provides time-proven comprehensive solutions that help couples reconnect with each other sexually, and take their intimacy and passion to new, previously unexplored heights.




Modern Kinship


Book Description

Same-sex marriage may be legal in America, but its still far from the accepted norm, especially in Christian circles. So where can LBGTQ Christians who desire a lifelong, covenantal relationship look for dating and marriage advice when Christian relationship guides have not only simply ignored but actively excluded same-sex couples? David and Constantino Khalaf struggled to find relational role models and guidance throughout dating, their engagement, and the early months of their marriage. To fill this void, they began writing Modern Kinship, a blog exploring the unique challenges queer couples face on the road from singleness to marital bliss. Part personal reflection, part commentary, and full of practical advice, Modern Kinship explores the biblical concept of kinship from a twenty-first-century perspective. This important resource tackles subjects such as dating outside of smartphone apps, overcoming church and family issues, meeting your partners parents, deciding when and how to have children, and finding your mission as a couple. Modern Kinship encourages queer Christian couples to build God-centered partnerships of trust and mutuality.




Intimate Relationships across Cultures


Book Description

A ground breaking study of the ways that intimate relationships are similar around the world, and the ways they are different.




Search For The Real Self


Book Description

From the authoritative expert in personality disorders, Search for the Real Self is a thorough dissection of how one’s real self is developed, how it relates to the outer world, and how personality disorders are understood and treated in our modern society. Personality disorders—borderline, narcissistic, and schizoid—have become the classic psychological disorders of our age. Outwardly successful, charming and powerful, personality-disordered individuals have long confounded their colleagues, family, lovers and employees—as well as mental health professionals. The author helps the reader understand them. After describing how the healthy real self develops and functions, he explains what can go wrong. Drawing on case histories, he shows how the false self behaves in relationships and on the job, and then delineates appropriate treatments, offering real hope for cure.