The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes


Book Description

A MASSIVE COLLECTION OF LAUGHABLE, CHEESY JOKES PERFECT FOR AMUSING DADS WHILE SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSING THE KIDS As groan-inducing as they are hilarious, dad jokes are the punny one-liners and oh-so-clever quips fathers never tire of telling. With this massive collection, no Dad will ever lack new material to make his kids facepalm: • A watermelon and a honeydew wanted to get married right away, but they cantaloupe. • After Humpty Dumpty recovered from his fall, he was just a shell of his former self. • Sign language interpreters have to lean sideways to translate something in italics. • Anyone with a wheat allergy that routinely eats pasta is just a gluten for punishment. • A chord walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bartender said, “We don’t serve minors.”




The Ultimate Dad Joke Book


Book Description

New for 2020! Easy Father's Day gift for your favorite guy! The Ultimate Dad Joke Book is jam packed with family friendly, clean and hysterical jokes that are great for everyone from your toddler to your great-grandma! Buckle up and get ready for some knee slapping, head shaking and gut busting laughter every time you flip a page. Over 500 hilarious jokes, puns and one-liners Squeaky clean, family safe jokes for kids (and adults) of all ages Great selection of time honored classics and all new jokes for 2020 Grab your copy today and channel your inner dad with some amazingly groan worthy humor bombs!




The World's Greatest Dad Jokes: The Complete Collection (The Heirloom Edition)


Book Description

Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe! Because the world needs more dad jokes. Hundreds more. What are dad jokes? Short, family-friendly one-liners that often produce more eye rolls and groans from their audience than audible laughs. Anyone can tell dad jokes, but they are best told by dads. The World’s Greatest Dad Jokes: The Complete Collection is here, and inside you'll find: More puns, quips, and corny one-liners that are sure to get eyes rolling Hundreds of dad jokes that will make you groan—then make you smile. This book is jam-packed with clever quips and unbearable wisecracks that are so bad, they’re good. Now the dad joke aficionado in your life will never run out of puns, no matter how much you might want them to. The perfect gift for the dad who thinks he’s heard them all, this book is sure to add even more jokes to his repertoire, for better or worse. These jokes are so funny you won't even see them coming!




Dad Jokes for Kids


Book Description

Turn the bad jokes back on dad with this seriously silly joke book, the perfect funny Halloween gift for kids and families to laugh and celebrate together! Dads have been embarrassing their kids for decades with goofy and groan-worthy jokes, and now it's their children's turn! In this hilarious new joke book from USA Today bestselling author Jimmy Niro, kids can out-dad-joke their dads and even learn how to write some of their own. Filled with over 350 silly jokes about school, sports, animals, and more, Dad Jokes for Kids will have young readers rolling on the floor with laughter! Plus, children can learn to write their own dad jokes with fun activities in the back! This book is perfect for: The whole family - perfect for kids ages 7 to 12, but offers fun for the entire family! Reluctant readers - fun jokes help engage reluctant kids, helping them gain confidence and build reading comprehension and vocabulary Screen-free time - Endless laughs for road trips, vacations, sleepovers, game nights, and more! Gifts - makes a great holiday stocking stuffer, white elephant gag gift for kids, or Father's Day gift to share with dads Includes jokes like: Q: What did the carrot say to the broccoli? A: Nothing. Vegetables can't talk. You can't play hide-and-seek with mountains. They're always peaking.




Dad Jokes


Book Description

Dad’s comedy arsenal is about to get a huge upgrade . . . to the relief of everyone around him! Cue the groans. Put an end to courtesy laughs and awkward silences with the jokes in this book! From the people who brought you Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader, this is an eclectic collection of the punniest, funniest, most outrageous knee-slappers that have ever been told! At work, at home, at the game—Dad will beat them all to the punch—line, that is! He’ll be hip and humorous with totally bodacious jokes like these: Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too! Why is Christmas just like another day in the office? Because you do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit! Dad: “I wouldn’t want to be buried in this graveyard.” Kid: “Why not?” Dad: “Because I'm not dead yet!” And many more!




Dad Jokes


Book Description

The perfect gift for dads and pun-lovers alike "Dad, can you put my shoes on?" "No, I don't think they'll fit me." Ah, the dad joke--humor that reminds us of all the lovable, embarrassing dads out there. Be prepared for the obvious, silly, and awkward in this massive collection of the best groan-worthy dad jokes around, including clever quips, overly literal dialogue, and punny one-liners. These jokes may be on porpoise, but they whale definitely make you laugh: I used to hate facial hair, but then it started growing on me. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down Q: What's the hardest thing about learning to ride a bicycle? A: The road. With over 600 knee-slappers, head-shakers, and groan-makers, Dad Jokes is packed with enough witty quips and cheesy-but-grate jokes for you to hold your own against even the most embarrassing of dads. But remember--you don't have to be a dad to tell dad jokes




Super Dad Jokes


Book Description

The ultimate laugh-out-loud Christmas gift for any pun lover or Super Dad out there! Q: What super power do you get when you become a parent? A: Supervision. Super Dad Jokes is perfect for all heroes out there—from the dad experts to the first-time fathers embracing their most cringe-worthy dad powers! This new edition from USA Today bestselling author Jimmy Niro has over 500 magnificent puns, stories, and anti-jokes—the best way to celebrate and laugh at dad's super (bad) joke skills! The perfect birthday gift, holiday stocking stuffer, or white elephant gag gift from any daughter, son, or partner to the super dad or grandpa who makes their eyes roll with super speed. Arm yourself against the forces of evil and good taste with this heroically funny joke book. It's time to save the world, one joke at a time! Includes knee-slappers like: I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm slowly getting over it. Q: What is the sleepiest fruit? A: Napricot. "Dad, do you want a box for your leftovers?" "No, but I'll wrestle you for them!"




World's Greatest Dad Jokes (Vol. 2)


Book Description

Over 200 new and improved dad jokes for any occasion. Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. Be the stand-up comedian of the century with 200 new and improved dad jokes for any occasion. This compact compendium of cheesy jokes is the perfect size for carrying with you for all your split-second bad joke needs. Never get stuck telling the same corny joke twice with this easy-to-use reference book to all things funny and punny. Whether you’re shopping for world’s Greatest Dads or a Faux Pa joker, World’s Greatest Dad Jokes Volume 2 is perfect for anyone who appreciates a well-placed pun.




All New Dad Jokes


Book Description

THE BRAND-NEW BOOK FROM @DADSAYSJOKES hr All New Dad Jokes is the second book from the most followed dad jokes page on Instagram, @DadSaysJokes. Now with a following of over 1 million, All New Dad Jokes provides brand new gags guaranteed to leave your friends and family laughing and groaning in equal measure. @DadSaysJokes is a community-run Instagram account with more than a million followers, inspired by the daily jokes of author Kit Chilvers' dad, Andrew. Every day, followers submit their jokes and the team picks their favourites - or Dad just drops in his own zinger! Kit, a young social networking mastermind started his career at the tender age of 14, when he created his original platform, Football.Newz, to serve audiences for the World cup 2014. He has recently added another nine platforms in different genres (of which @DadSaysJokes is one), with nine million followers and rising. This is his second book. Q: Where do naughty rainbows go? A: Prism.




The Big Book of Dad Jokes


Book Description

Hundreds and Hundreds of Jokes that Will Drive Your Family Crazy Nothing is more hilarious for moms, sons, and daughters than the bad jokes dads tell. (Well, at least he thinks they're hilarious . . .) Have you ever noticed when you’re out to dinner and your dad takes it upon himself to antagonize your server with a lame joke? Has he ever made a pun that made everyone at a family gathering roll their eyes? Has he ever made a corny comment about things simply lying around the house? If you answered “yes” to any of the following, you’re not alone. Dad jokes are at the center of all dad interactions and the core of every dad’s persona. This comedic compendium compiles more than eight hundred of the best jokes dads can use to hone their craft and ensure maximum eye rolling. Included within are jokes such as: Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food; no atmosphere. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant. What kind of tea is hard to swallow? Reality. With Dad Jokes, give your dad the gift of becoming the least funny/most "punny" guy in the room.