When Santa Lost His Ho! Ho! Ho!


Book Description

It's almost Christmas, and everyone—from Mrs. Claus right down to the littlest elf—is getting ready for the big day. But there's something wrong at the North Pole. It's just a bit too . . . quiet. Oh no! Santa has lost his laugh! Where could it be? And how can there be Christmas without Santa's Ho! Ho! Ho! From the author of Santa's New Suit and Who'll Pull Santa's Sleigh Tonight? comes a holiday romp that's sure to make readers giggle with glee.




The Year Santa Lost His List


Book Description

With list in hand, Santa boarded his sleigh on Christmas Eve. Things were going well until a huge gush of wind blew the list right out of Santa's hand. Santa still had gifts to deliver, but without his list, he had no idea which gift to deliver to which child. He brought ice skates to Julie, who always wanted to be an artist. Noah, whose only interest was baseball, received a guitar and microphone. Santa was worried that he may not have gotten the gifts delivered to the right children, but he didn't need to worry. Children will discover, along with Santa the magic that took place, the year Santa lost his list!




The Night Santa Lost His Pants


Book Description

"Santa was dreadfully embarrassed the night he lost his pants and Mrs. Claus was horrified when he arrived home pants-less"--Back cover.




How Santa Lost His Job


Book Description

Frustrated by Santa's slowness at Christmastime, the elf Muckle creates a mechanical replacement called the Deliverator, and proposes a series of contests to prove that it can do Santa's job better than he can.




The Night Santa Got Lost


Book Description

Every Christmas millions of kids and adults track Santa on the NORAD Santa Tracker. Now, author Michael Keane brings to life this fun tradition with his new children’s book The Night Santa Got Lost: How NORAD Saved Christmas. Written in the iconic style of “The Night Before Christmas,” The Night Santa Got Lost begins on a blustery and treacherous Christmas Eve as Santa sets off to deliver toys to good little boys and girls everywhere. As always, NORAD is faithfully tracking him to make sure no harm comes his way. But when Santa disappears from their radar screen, NORAD’s skills and resources are put to the test as they scramble to find Santa and save Christmas. Entertaining and educational, The Night Santa Got Lost will delight parents and children alike while teaching kids about our military, team work, and the true spirit of Christmas.




How Santa Lost His Jollies


Book Description

Brimming with laugh-out-loud Santa stories, How Santa Lost His Jollies is a humorous take on Santa "events" from around the globe, from Santa gropers, to flying Santas (Elvis impersonators), to patented Santa traps, and of course, the usual kids (naughty) with their Santa-defying tricks. Drawn from genuine, and documented, news articles, How Santa Lost His Jollies reveals the trial and tribulations- even dangerous situations -endured by today's Santa. Well, not the real Santa, but those jolly old elves who work the trade for dollars. Admittedly, it was one dark and dismal Christmas Eve when in a desperate attempt to ignite my own holiday spirit, I resorted to dredging up Santa-in-the-news events off the internet. It wasn't long before I found myself laughing out loud. Therein lies the beginning of How Santa Lost His Jollies -- as well as the crummy feeling one gets upon discovering that the guy who delivered your first bicycle is right now busy getting his nose bloodied and a couple of eyes seriously discolored in a back alley, one quite possibly located near you. Santa stories, like all holiday stories, are meant to be shared. Accordingly, each Santa news event has been reconfigured to include a short multiple-choice quiz designed to keep both grinches and guests engaged and amused. You already know the scene: Christmas day; cooks in the kitchen; kids squabbling over noisy, blinking toys; teenagers tying up the TV with noisier, electronic games; guys swapping fish stories; and the self-appointed in-law joke-teller laughing at his own dirty jokes. Time to open How Santa Lost His Jollies, assign the family grinch to read the stories out loud and let the cooks, kids, and by now slightly inebriated men-folk guess the punch lines. Only right answers count.




Santa, Bring Me a Biker!


Book Description

Tinsley Parker is a scattered, scorned, mess of a woman this holiday season. This year has been one thing after another with no end in sight. Down on her luck, a drunk evening with her only sister lands them both writing letters to Santa. A simple mix-up when delivering her nephew’s letter lands her secret wish in the hands of Ryan Causley. One Christmas wish from one hopeless woman turns into a miracle for a family that has been dealt too many hard knocks. Do you still believe in the magic of Christmas?




Ho-Ho-Hopeless Santa


Book Description

The holidays are supposed to be a festive and joyful time but everything is going wrong for Father Christmas…will things turn out all right? Find out in this hilarious and fun Christmas story! The elves are busily working to get everything ready for Christmas but what’s this…Father Christmas is wrapping presents with tin foil? And his beard looks a little wonky? He doesn’t seem to be able to get anything right! Could he be the wrong Santa? Find out if Christmas can be saved in this silly story about mistaken identity. Kids and adults alike will enjoy the humorous rhyming text and detailed illustrations.




Your Own Song To Sing


Book Description

AUTHOR UP CLOSE. I have been a contractor most of my adult life. This is actually a second career for me. Hopefully you have enjoyed many of my lyrics in this book. Some words I spelled wrong on purpose, I guess you know that by now. I did so the end of the word would have the effect I wanted; many lyricists do that. If by chance there are others, then shame on me and my spell check. Grammar never was my best subject. I’m married with six children and nine grandchildren. Working in any form has been my many hobbies. This is my first edition of Your Own Song to Sing. I will be doing additional editions, probably one a year for the next four or five years. Without writing any new material, I have enough to fill that many books, and yes, I’m still writing. Again I surely hope to see some of you that use my lyrics, if not on center stage when the awards come around. Meanwhile All Stay Well.—SAVERIO




The Year's Best Science Fiction: Thirty-Second Annual Collection


Book Description

"The thirty-six stories in this collection imaginatively take us far across the universe, into the very core of our beings, to the realm of the gods, and the moment just after now"--Page 4 of cover.