Today I Am a Ma'am


Book Description

Valerie Harper has a message for women of a certain age: "Work those laugh lines!" With the irreverence and wit that made her one of television's most beloved personalities, Harper (a.k.a. Rhoda Morgenstern) takes on those phony "fabulous at 50" books written by women whose skin is free of laugh lines and who wouldn't know a cellulite pocket if it bit them on the backside. With her trademark shoot-from-the-hip, call-'em-like-she-sees-'em style, she helps women celebrate, with humor and grace, what it means to be middle aged. Harper's essays explore the treacherous terrain women must travel -- from the tyrannies of fashion to the unmentionables of menopause. She tackles the most perplexing questions of the day: If you wear a size zero, do you exist? Would menopause be revered if it happened to men? Do calories count if you eat standing up? Are dressing rooms fitted with fun house mirrors? Today I Am a Ma'am is the perfect antidote to the youth obsession of our culture, offered by America's most reliable girlfriend. It is Humor Replacement Therapy for midlife women, a book you can pick up when ever you need a laugh or a reminder that midriff drift is not the end of the world.




I Am Jazz


Book Description

The story of a transgender child based on the real-life experience of Jazz Jennings, who has become a spokesperson for transkids everywhere "This is an essential tool for parents and teachers to share with children whether those kids identify as trans or not. I wish I had had a book like this when I was a kid struggling with gender identity questions. I found it deeply moving in its simplicity and honesty."—Laverne Cox (who plays Sophia in “Orange Is the New Black”) From the time she was two years old, Jazz knew that she had a girl's brain in a boy's body. She loved pink and dressing up as a mermaid and didn't feel like herself in boys' clothing. This confused her family, until they took her to a doctor who said that Jazz was transgender and that she was born that way. Jazz's story is based on her real-life experience and she tells it in a simple, clear way that will be appreciated by picture book readers, their parents, and teachers.




Thank You, M'am


Book Description

When a young boy named Roger tries to steal the purse of a woman named Luella, he is just looking for money to buy stylish new shoes. After she grabs him by the collar and drags him back to her home, he's sure that he is in deep trouble. Instead, Roger is soon left speechless by her kindness and generosity.




Excuse Me Ma'am, Excuse Me Sir


Book Description

Have you ever been asked, "Where are you from?," simply because you look or dress differently? Although Amina was born and raised in America, she is constantly asked the same question because she doesn't look "American." Being American means being different. So, join Amina on her adventure through different states; highlighting America's beauty and embracing its many scenic features yet remaining ONE United States. Because in the end, like every state is one of a kind, so is every American, including Amina!




Anything for you, Ma'am


Book Description

… As a professor in IIT Delhi is busy with his love, Biobull, a revolutionary bus that will run on human discharge and provide a somewhat funny, yet, inexhaustible alternate fuel… one of his students is busy with his-a girl thankfully. Tejas Narulas college misadventures and comic entanglements are a result of the twisted hand of Fate. Follow his journey across the nation to his love, aided only by his ingenuity and a trustworthy band of friends.




Ma'am Jones of the Pecos


Book Description

"An unusual story of an American pioneer woman who used a needle, skillet, orgun, as needed, and who tended the dying during frontier wars or outbreaks ofequally deadly diseases."--"The Old Bookaroos."




Yes, Ma'am


Book Description

Experience the thrill of submission to the woman who dominates you day and night. In this collection, naughty boys get what's coming to them from wicked wives and stern mistresses. From a naked party plaything at the mercy of a room full of powerful women to being tied up and shown how to truly please the woman of your dreams, these men get fully teased and taunted, receiving the punishments they truly deserve and crave. Featuring stories from Alison Tyler, Debra Hyde and Ellen Tevault, Yes, Ma’am gives a whole new meaning to "mean girls," one that will be sure to delight and arouse you.




Quirkyalone


Book Description

quirkyalone (kwur.kee.uh.lohn) n. adj. A person who enjoys being single (but is not opposed to being in a relationship) and generally prefers to be alone rather than date for the sake of being in a couple. With unique traits and an optimistic spirit; a sensibility that transcends relationship status. Also adj. Of, relating to, or embodying quirkyalones. See also: romantic, idealist, independent. Are you a quirkyalone? Do you know someone who is? Do you believe life can be prosperous and great with or without a mate? Do you value your friendships as much as your romantic relationships? Do gut instincts guide your most important decisions? Are you often among the first on the dance floor? Coupled or single, man or woman, social butterfly or shrinking violet, quirkyalones have walked among us, invisible until now. Through the coining of a new word, this tribe has been given a voice. Meet the quirkyalones. Read about: The quirkyalone nation: where we live, what we do Quirkytogethers (quirkyalones who have entered long–term relationships) Sex and the single quirkyalone Romantic obsession: the dark side of the quirkyalone's romantic personality Quirkyalones throughout history (profiles in courage)




Good Morning Ma'am


Book Description

Take a nostalgic journey back in time with Good Morning Ma’am, a light-hearted book which can be enjoyed by everyone. Filled with anecdotes chronicling the experiences of a teacher, it targets a wide spectrum of readers from parents and teaching professionals to those who just want a good laugh. The book, which includes funny handwritten notes from children and amusing illustrations, is sure to get readers reminiscing about pranks and mischief from their childhood. Escape reality and enter the wonderful world of children with Good Morning Ma’am!




Ma'am Darling


Book Description

A GUARDIAN BOOK OF THE YEAR * A TIMES BOOK OF THE YEAR * A SUNDAY TIMES BOOK OF THE YEAR * A DAILY MAIL BOOK OF THE YEAR 'An original, memorable and substantial achievement' TLS'A masterpiece' Mail on Sunday'I honked so loudly the man sitting next to me dropped his sandwich' ObserverShe made John Lennon blush and Marlon Brando clam up. She cold-shouldered Princess Diana and humiliated Elizabeth Taylor. Andy Warhol photographed her. Jack Nicholson offered her cocaine. Gore Vidal revered her. John Fowles hoped to keep her as his sex-slave. Dudley Moore propositioned her. Francis Bacon heckled her. Peter Sellers was in love with her. For Pablo Picasso, she was the object of sexual fantasy. "If they knew what I had done in my dreams with your royal ladies" he confided to a friend, "they would take me to the Tower of London and chop off my head!" Princess Margaret aroused passion and indignation in equal measures. To her friends, she was witty and regal. To her enemies, she was rude and demanding. In her 1950's heyday, she was seen as one of the most glamorous and desirable women in the world. By the time of her death, she had come to personify disappointment. One friend said he had never known an unhappier woman. The tale of Princess Margaret is pantomime as tragedy, and tragedy as pantomime. It is Cinderella in reverse: hope dashed, happiness mislaid, life mishandled. Combining interviews, parodies, dreams, parallel lives, diaries, announcements, lists, catalogues and essays, Ma'am Darling is a kaleidoscopic experiment in biography, and a witty meditation on fame and art, snobbery and deference, bohemia and high society. 'Brown has been our best parodist and satirist for decades now ... Ma'am Darling is, as you would expect, very funny; also, full of quirky facts and genial footnotes. Brown has managed to ingest huge numbers of royal books and documents without losing either his judgment or his sanity. He adores the spectacle of human vanity' Julian Barnes, Guardian