Too Funny to be President


Book Description

"With a bumper crop of presidential candidates surfacing, I have concluded that a plague of presidentialitis has swept the nation. Speaking from experience, I must remind all these worthy contenders that once this dreaded disease-- whose symptoms include delusions of grandeur and an urge to make repeated visits to Iowa-- gets into a man's bloodstream, it can only be cured by embalming fluid." --Mo UdallMorris "Mo" Udall, Arizona's Democratic congressman for thirty years, was as well known for his sense of humor as for his dedication to environmental causes. And it was during his 1976 campaign for the Democratic presidential nomination, when he claims he drew more laughter than votes, that James K. Kilpatrick pronounced him "too funny to be president."Udall kept four black notebooks of jokes that he had collected throughout his public life. Some he heard in the courtroom or on the floor of the House; others he found in old speeches and newspaper articles; still others he swiped on the rubber-chicken circuit. This book, a memoir of Udall's career, collects many of those jokes to create a citizen's guide to the lighter side of politics."After due deliberation and two stiff drinks," Udall writes, "I decided to go ahead and write this book because I'm convinced that humor is as necessary to the health of our political discourse as it is in our private lives." Too Funny To Be President is a testament to the Udall spirit--and an example to all who would win the public's heart.




You Can't Spell America Without Me


Book Description

Political satire as deeper truth: Donald Trump’s presidential memoir, as recorded by two world-renowned Trump scholars, and experts on greatness generally "I have the best words, beautiful words, as everybody has been talking and talking about for a long time. Also? The best sentences and, what do you call them, paragraphs. My previous books were great and sold extremely, unbelievably well--even the ones by dishonest, disgusting so-called journalists. But those writers didn't understand Trump, because quite frankly they were major losers. People say if you want it done right you have to do it yourself, even when 'it' is a 'memoir.' So every word of this book was written by me, using a special advanced word processing system during the many, many nights I've been forced to stay alone in the White House--only me, just me, trust me, nobody helped. And it's all 100% true, so true--people are already saying it may be the truest book ever published. Enjoy." Until Donald Trump publishes the ultimate account of his entire four or eight or one-and-a-half years in the White House, the definitive chronicle will be You Can’t Spell America Without Me: The Really Tremendous Inside Story of My Fantastic First Year As President. Trump was elected because he was the most frank presidential candidate in history, a man eager to tell the unvarnished truth about others’ flaws and tout his own amazing excellence. Now he levels his refreshingly compulsive, un-PC candor at his landslide election victory as well as his role as commander-in-chief and leader of the free world. There are intimate, powerful, mind-boggling revelations on every page. You are there with him during his private encounters with world leaders, a few of whom he does not insult. You are there at the genius Oval Office strategy sessions with his advisers. You are there in his White House bedroom as he crafts the pre-dawn Twitter pronouncements that rock the world. And, of course, you are there on the golf course as Trump attempts to manage the burdens of his office. President Trump explains each of the historic decisions that have already made America great again, and how he always triumphs over the fake news media. You'll learn what he really thinks of his cabinet members and top aides not related to him, of the First Lady and the First Daughter and the additional three or four Trump children. Included at no extra charge is a lavish and exclusive portfolio of spectacular, historic and intimate color photographs of President Trump in private – inside the White House, inside Mar-a-Lago, at Trump Tower, and more. You Can’t Spell America Without Me is presented by America’s foremost Trump scholar Kurt Andersen as well as America's foremost mediocre Trump impersonator, Alec Baldwin. You Can't Spell America Without Me is the perfect holiday gift!




Speaking My Mind


Book Description

The most important speeches of America's "Great Communicator": Here, in his own words, is the record of Ronald Reagan's remarkable political career and historic eight-year presidency.




So You Want to be President?


Book Description

Presents an assortment of facts about the qualifications and characteristics of U.S. presidents, from George Washington to Bill Clinton.




President Squid


Book Description

Join Aaron Reynolds and Sara Varon as they explore the ideal qualities of leaders, diplomats...and giant squid. Squid knows all about being president. It means living in a big house, doing all the talking—oh, and having a tie is crucial. He's all set! In the next election, make a more informed choice. Vote for President Squid! And this is the fixed-format version, which looks almost identical to the print edition!




The Toddler in Chief


Book Description

“It may be cold comfort in this chaotic era, but Americans should know that there are adults in the room. . . . And we are trying to do what’s right even when Donald Trump won’t.”—An anonymous senior administrative official in an op-ed published in a New York Times op-ed, September 5, 2018 Every president faces criticism and caricature. Donald Trump, however, is unique in that he is routinely characterized in ways more suitable for a toddler. What’s more, it is not just Democrats, pundits, or protestors who compare the president to a child; Trump’s staffers, subordinates, and allies on Capitol Hill also describe Trump like a small, badly behaved preschooler. In April 2017, Daniel W. Drezner began curating every example he could find of a Trump ally describing the president like a toddler. So far, he’s collected more than one thousand tweets—a rate of more than one a day. In The Toddler-in-Chief, Drezner draws on these examples to take readers through the different dimensions of Trump’s infantile behavior, from temper tantrums to poor impulse control to the possibility that the President has had too much screen time. How much damage can really be done by a giant man-baby? Quite a lot, Drezner argues, due to the winnowing away of presidential checks and balances over the past fifty years. In these pages, Drezner follows his theme—the specific ways in which sharing some of the traits of a toddler makes a person ill-suited to the presidency—to show the lasting, deleterious impact the Trump administration will have on American foreign policy and democracy. The “adults in the room” may not be able to rein in Trump’s toddler-like behavior, but, with the 2020 election fast approaching, the American people can think about whether they want the most powerful office turned into a poorly run political day care facility. Drezner exhorts us to elect a commander-in-chief, not a toddler-in-chief. And along the way, he shows how we must rethink the terrifying powers we have given the presidency.




My Father, My President


Book Description

Revised and updated with six new chapters and many new photographs following his death at age 94, this is the definitive account of George H.W. Bush's life and career written by his only daughter with his full cooperation. Much happened to George H.W. Bush and the country since the initial publication of My Father, My President: His nemesis, Saddam Huessin, has been captured and executed. And while his son George W. Bush has left the White House, his grandson George P. Bush serves as the Commissioner of the Texas General Land Office. As author Doro Bush Koch did for the 2006 edition, she again has contacted hundreds of the late President's friends and associates, conducted scores of interviews with dignitaries; tapped the memories of family members, including her late mother, her four brothers, and of course, her late father himself; and collected new information from the former President's never-before released files. This memoir offers fascinating details about his tenure as head of the Republican National Committee during Watergate, Ambassador to the U.N., America's liaison to China, and Vice President for eight years under Ronald Reagan. Doro shows how the 41st President felt when two of his sons entered politics. She also sheds new light on the unlikely friendship with the President's once-rival Bill Clinton and former President Barack Obama. Distinguished by its many first-person accounts, never-before-published photos, and a foreword by the late Barbara Bush, My Father, My President is at once the history of a great man, and the chronicle of a rapidly changing nation.




I Am a Genius of Unspeakable Evil and I Want to Be Your Class President


Book Description

Family Guy meets Election in this hilarious young adult debut! Twelve-year-old Oliver Watson’s got the IQ of a grilled cheese sandwich. Or so everyone in Omaha thinks. In reality, Oliver’s a mad evil genius on his way to world domination, and he’s used his great brain to make himself the third-richest person on earth! Then Oliver’s father—and archnemesis—makes a crack about the upcoming middle school election, and Oliver takes it as a personal challenge. He’ll run, and he’ll win! Turns out, though, that overthrowing foreign dictators is actually way easier than getting kids to like you. . . Can this evil genius win the class presidency and keep his true identity a secret, all in time to impress his dad?




Kid President's Guide to Being Awesome


Book Description

"This is LIFE, people! You've got air coming through your nose! You've got a heartbeat! That means it's time to do something!" announces Kid President in his book, Kid President's Guide to Being Awesome. From YouTube sensation (75 million views and counting!) to Hub Network summer series star, Kid President—ten-year-old Robby Novak—and his videos have inspired millions to dance more, to celebrate life, and to throw spontaneous parades. In his Guide to Being Awesome, Kid President pulls together lists of awesome ideas to help the world, awesome interviews with his awesome celebrity friends (he has interviewed Beyoncé!), and a step-by-step guide to make pretty much everything a little bit awesomer. Grab a corn dog and settle in to your favorite comfy chair. Pretend it's your birthday! (In fact, treat everyone like it's THEIR birthday!) Kid President is here with a 240-page, full-color Guide to Being Awesome that'll spread love and inspire the world.




It's Kind of a Funny Story


Book Description

Like many ambitious New York City teenagers, Craig Gilner sees entry into Manhattan's Executive Pre-Professional High School as the ticket to his future. Determined to succeed at life—which means getting into the right high school to get into the right college to get the right job—Craig studies night and day to ace the entrance exam, and does. That's when things start to get crazy. At his new school, Craig realizes that he isn't brilliant compared to the other kids; he's just average, and maybe not even that. He soon sees his once-perfect future crumbling away.