Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Colossal Collection of Quotable Quotes


Book Description

You’ll never be at a loss for words again with this inspired collection of quotes, from bona fide wits to bona fide dimwits. Bob Hope once said, "I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance--waiting for the bathroom." No doubt, lots of people will be learning to tango and foxtrot while they wait for the rabid readers of Uncle John’s Colossal Collection of Quotable Quotes to emerge from the privy. The Bathroom Readers’ Institute searched high and low for the wittiest, wisest and stupidest things ever said, and collected these remarks in one remarkable volume. With more than 4,000 quotations from 1,600 speakers and writers--from bona fide wits like Oscar Wilde and David Letterman, to bona fide dimwits like Britney Spears (who infamously quipped, "I go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.")--there’s no other book of quotations quite like this one.




Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Quintessential Collection of Notable Quotables


Book Description

An all-new follow up quotation book to 2004’s Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Colossal Collection of Quotable Quotes, complete with indexes by name and by subject for easy reference. Here it is: the quintessential collection of notable quotes for all occasions. Grouped together in weird categories as only Uncle John could do, you’ll find quotes about farts, firsts, dogs, Canada, male chauvinist pigs, colors, TV, aliens, and more! And not just quotes, either--there are great facts, fun quizzes, and a few longer articles about how quotations shape our world. As if that weren’t enough, there are a ton of eye-opening new entries for Uncle John’s Quotationary. (Love: “Being stupid together.” --Paul Valery) And to make it easier than ever to find the exact quote you’re looking for, there is a by-subject index as well a by-name index. Here are but a few of the thousands of great quotations awaiting you: * “I don’t really care what I’m famous for.” --Jessica Simpson * “Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.” --Charlie Chaplin * “The way that I feel about music is there is no right and wrong. Only true and false.” --Fiona Apple * “One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.” --A. A. Milne * “Bears are crazy. They’ll bite your head if you’re wearing a steak on it.” --Space Ghost * “I don’t mind not being president. I just mind that someone else is.” --Ted Kennedy * “If little else, the brain is an educational toy.” --Tom Robbins




Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Quintessential Collection Of Notable Quotables For Every Conceivable Occasion


Book Description

Here it is: the quintessential collection of notable quotes for all occasions. Grouped together in weird categories as only Uncle John could do, you'll find quotes about farts, firsts, dogs, Canada, male chauvinist pigs, colors, TV, aliens, and more! And not just quotes, either'there are great facts, fun quizzes, and a few longer articles about how quotations shape our world. As if that weren't enough, there are a ton of eye-opening new entries for Uncle John's Quotationary. (Love: "Being stupid together."'Paul Valery) And to make it easier than ever to find the exact quote you're looking for, there is a by-subject index as well a by-name index. Here are but a few of the thousands of great quotations awaiting you: "I don't really care what I'm famous for."'Jessica Simpson "Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot."'Charlie Chaplin "The way that I feel about music is there is no right and wrong. Only true and false."'Fiona Apple "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries."'A. A. Milne "Bears are crazy. They'll bite your head if you're wearing a steak on it."'Space Ghost.




Quintessential Collection of Notable Quotables


Book Description

Here it is:the quintessential collection of notable quotes for all occasions. Grouped together in weird categories as only Uncle John could do, you'll find quotes about farts, firsts, dogs, Canada, male chauvinist pigs, colors, TV, aliens, and more! And not just quotes, either--there are great facts, fun quizzes, and a few longer articles about how quotations shape our world. As if that weren't enough, there are a ton of eye-opening new entries for Uncle John's Quotationary. (Love: "Being stupid together." --Paul Valery) And to make it easier than ever to find the exact quote you're looking for, there is a by-subject index as well a by-name index. Here are but a few of the thousands of great quotations awaiting you: * "I don't really care what I'm famous for." --Jessica Simpson * "Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot." --Charlie Chaplin * "The way that I feel about music is there is no right and wrong. Only true and false." --Fiona Apple * "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries." --A. A. Milne * "Bears are crazy. They'll bite your head if you're wearing a steak on it." --Space Ghost * "I don't mind not being president. I just mind that someone else is." --Ted Kennedy * "If little else, the brain is an educational toy." --Tom Robbins




Uncle John's Facts to Go Mouthing Off


Book Description

“There’s never been a better quote book for only three bucks.” —Uncle John In the 26-year history of the Bathroom Readers’ Institute, we have collected tens of thousands of the world’s most memorable quotations. In this e-book, you’ll find the very best of them (along with some newly-discovered utterances). From the profound to the sublime, from the witty to the stupid, after reading Mouthing Off, you’ll never be at a loss for words again! Some highlights: • Surprisingly wise celebrities, cocky rock stars, and dumb jocks • When commentators misspeak, and other foot-in-mouth moments • What Mark Twain didn’t say • Hollywood’s all-time weirdest acceptance speeches • Talk show guests deemed too mouthy for TV • Wacky 911 calls and court transcripts • Ancient quotes that still resonate today • Modern pearls of wisdom, including actor (and racing enthusiast) Paul Newman’s observation: “It is useless to put on your brakes when you’re upside down.” And much, much more!
















Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Treasury


Book Description

This collection of slap shots, high sticks, and toothless grins offers fans everything they love about hockey: its colorful history, legendary players, and enough hard-hitting trivia to occupy even the most avid stat head. The latest title in the new Uncle John's series dedicated to the wide (and weird ) world of sports, Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Shoots and Scores shares the origins of the Coolest Game on Earth, the greatest teams in hockey history, the best (and worst) hockey movies of all time, the Incredible Exploding Zamboni (and those who lived to tell the tale), a rap sheet of hockey arrests, goalies' superstitions (Patrick Roy's conversations with goal posts; Glenn Hall's pre-game gastric cleansing), and much, much more.