We Adopted Five Special-Needs Foster Kids


Book Description

A powerful memoir about the joys and pains of making a family. In 2008, Ann and Dan made the life-altering decision to start a family. In their mid-forties and inspired by various stories that they had heard, the couple decided to adopt special needs children through foster care. Not wanting to separate siblings, Ann and Dan’s family eventually grows to seven, first with the adoption of Jimmy and Ruby, and then Jason, Susie, and Anthony. But, the transition was not without its challenges. The children, aged five to ten years old, had been neglected, abused, and diagnosed with behavioral, cognitive, medical, and psychiatric conditions, none of which could be treated medically. Their first months in their new home were intense, overwhelming, and on occasion, violent. With numerous outbursts and incidents, Ann and Dan’s patience and resolve were constantly tested. But slowly, when surrounded with stability, warmth, compassion, and love, the children settled in and became a family. Poignant and heartfelt, We Adopted Five Special-Needs Foster Kids is for any reader who has ever been part of a family.




Kids Need to Be Safe


Book Description

“Kids are important… They need safe places to live, and safe places to play.” For some kids, this means living with foster parents. In simple words and full-color illustrations, this book explains why some kids move to foster homes, what foster parents do, and ways kids might feel during foster care. Children often believe that they are in foster care because they are “bad.” This book makes it clear that the troubles in their lives are not their fault; the message throughout is one of hope and support. Includes resources and information for parents, foster parents, social workers, counselors, and teachers.




Second Time Foster Child


Book Description

“Toni walks us through the experience of having foster children with undiagnosed mental illness . . . moving and heart-wrenching” (Marcia Stein, PHR, CA, author of Strained Relations). As an infant, Daniel entered the foster care system as a result of severe neglect, which manifested in violence and aggression later in his childhood after he was adopted by Jim and Toni Hoy. Desperate to get him into a residential treatment center and keep their other children safe, Jim and Toni were given two options by the state of Illinois: either keep him in a psychiatric hospital or be charged by the Department of Children and Family Services with child endangerment for failure to protect their other children. Mental health professionals recommended abandoning Daniel at the hospital after the state denied all viable sources of funding for his treatment. So Daniel re-entered the foster care system for no other reason than he was mentally ill. A year later, Daniel’s mother discovered that his treatment was covered by a funding source that he was awarded as part of his special needs adoption. How could they get the state government to understand the federal law and re-gain custody of their son? Second Time Foster Child is the story of parents who never gave up on their son, despite being prosecuted and persecuted in exchange for his medically necessary treatment. “Toni Hoy bares her soul in this courageous true story of her family’s journey to help and heal her severely traumatized adopted son.” —Michael Groomer, founder, and Beverly Hansen, executive director, Advocates for Children of Trauma




Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew


Book Description

"Birthdays may be difficult for me." "I want you to take the initiative in opening conversations about my birth family." "When I act out my fears in obnoxious ways, please hang in there with me." "I am afraid you will abandon me." The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the twenty complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love--that he must grieve his loss now if he is to receive love fully in the future--that she needs honest information about her birth family no matter how painful the details may be--and that although he may choose to search for his birth family, he will always rely on you to be his parents. Filled with powerful insights from children, parents, and experts in the field, plus practical strategies and case histories that will ring true for every adoptive family, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew is an invaluable guide to the complex emotions that take up residence within the heart of the adopted child--and within the adoptive home.




Parenting Your Adopted Older Child


Book Description

This comprehensive guide provides specific parenting strategies for the growing number of people who adopt children over two years old. Parents learn to identify their child's needs, meet such challenges as aggressive behavior and attention deficit disorder, and create a sense of belonging.




Home for Good


Book Description

Tying in to a nationwide joint campaign by the Evangelical Alliance and Care for the Family, Krish Kandiah wants us all to take seriously Jesus's call to 'suffer the little children' by engaging with the needs of the many thousands of children up and down the country who are in care and whom the church could and should be helping. Krish and his wife Miriam have adopted and fostered children themselves and their experience - and that of the many others in this book - is very different from the popular myth which suggests social services seek to prevent Christians from getting involved. Krish argues that whatever the state's stance may be, it is a part of our calling as God's church to get involved where it's hardest, and to help these children out of the tough realities they find themselves in. Filled with stories from people who have adopted or were adopted themselves, alongside practical advice on how it all works and the challenges that will come, this book makes a compelling case that the church can and must make a difference in these children's lives, and asks us all to consider our response.




Foster the Family


Book Description

There are great rewards that come along with being a foster parent, yet there are also great challenges that can leave you feeling depleted, alone, and discouraged. The many burdens of a foster parent's day--hurting children, struggling biological parents, and a broken system--are only compounded by the many burdens of a foster parent's heart--confusion, anxiety, heartache, anger, and fear. With the compassion and insight of a fellow foster parent, Jamie C. Finn helps you see your struggles through the lens of the gospel, bringing biblical truths to bear on your unique everyday realities. In these short, easy-to-read chapters, you'll find honest, personal stories and practical lessons that provide encouragement and direction from God's Word as you walk the journey of foster parenting.




Small Town, Big Miracle


Book Description

On one memorable day, while Bishop Martin and his wife, Donna, were in prayer together, God gave them a one-word message: "Adopt!" Over the next five years, the Martins would adopt four kids. Others in their church community have heard the call and have now adopted 72 children.




The Primal Wound


Book Description

Originally published in 1993, this classic piece of literature on adoption has revolutionised the way people think about adopted children. Nancy Verrier examines the life-long consequences of the 'primal wound' - the wound that is caused when a child is separated from its mother - for adopted people. Her argument is supported by thorough research in pre- and perinatal psychology, attachment, bonding and the effects of loss.




Facilitating Developmental Attachment


Book Description

This book shows how to work successfully with emotional and behavioral problems rooted in deficient early attachments. In particular, it addresses the emotional difficulties of many of the foster and adopted children living in our country who are unable to form secure attachments. Traditional interventions, which do not teach parents how to successfully engage the child, frequently do not provide the means by which the seriously damaged child can form the secure attachment that underlies behavioral change. Dr. Daniel Hughes maps out a treatment plan designed to help the child begin to experience and accept, from both the therapist and the parents, affective attunement that he or she should have received in the first few years of life. Hughes' approach includes: —Using foster and adopted parents as co-therapists —Teaching differentiation between old and new parents —Overcoming the perception of discipline as abusive —Framing misbehavior, discipline, conflicts, and parental authority as important aspects of a child's learning to trust. All children, at the core of their beings, need to be attached to someone who considers them to be very special and who is committed to providing for their ongoing care. Children who lose their birth parents desperately need such a relationship if they are to heal and grow. This book shows therapists how to facilitate this crucial bond. A Jason Aronson Book